IBD and me

wait he found out you have TSR?

x

Sorry to hear about your IBD It really is an unpleasant condition that feels like it takes over your life, so I can understand how you feel. But it is important keep trying to fight back and stay positive, which I can see you are trying

Hopefully though your condition does improve with time and you find the medication that work best for you, and you experience some remissions and reduced incidence of flares. It's not impossible, and whilst anecdotal, I know people who have improved and gotten better control of their condition over time.

This is a great. I do really admire your determination and drive. Don't worry about it being too long. (there were paragraphs so it's okay ). You deserve the very best and that's what you'd get.
We will always be here.

@Cremated_Spatula I found this, which I think is hilarious and so sweet, and I added a line of it on my A4 sheet:

@ravioliyears Aww, I came across your blog and after reading about your condition I just want to give you a hug

No one should have to go through that and you are so strong for getting through life despite it being there

Best of luck for the future, I'm sure you'll do very well and I hope your condition gets better xxx

Hi all! Now for my intro

Warning - this is a rant.

I've not been in a good state the past few days. Forget days, for the past year or so. I don''t know if you read quite an old post of mine (when I first joined TSR a few months ago), I wrote about how I suffer from a form of IBD, called Ulcerative Colitis. Usually, people begin getting symptoms around the age of 15-16, but I started getting it at the age of 11. It affects 1 in 420 people, which in theory may not seem like a lot and this horrible rant may make me sound selfish as I'm not a rarity (techinically I am because no-one in my family has ever had it and it rarely occurs in asians). It began very severly, therefore I prescribed a high dose medication (800mg tablet thrice daily).To be frank, its a **** condition. A very **** condition (no pun intended). Its so unexpected and you never know when something is gonna pop up.

I'm sick of it. I really am sick of it. I'm sick of the pain that I go through when I wake up in the morning, I'm sick of the medication I practically have to take for the rest of my life because there isn't a cure, I'm sick of holding in the tears whenever I'm in school because I want to try and keep a happy face, I'm sick of the fact that my hands are always trembling, which results in me missing practical lessons in the engineeirng workshop and I'm sick of the questions that people keep asking me. With my condition, I have really bad stomach aches and because it is so unexpected, I can get extra time in exams and I frequently need to take breaks between lessons. One reason why I never want to return back to class is because people begin to ask me questions about why I drink so much water and why I need to leave class so many times. I hate it. I feel like sticking a post it note on my forehead stating that. And because I go to a school where there are predominantly males, they always tend to think its periods. FFS ITS NOT AWAYS ABOUT PERIODS. It drives me INSANE.

It got to a point where today, I had to miss yet another practical lesson and someone commented, which caused me to start crying at break. I never usually cry, and this was the first time my friend of 5 years had ever seen me actually cry about something. I understand that having UC is not something that was intentionally given to me to make my life miserable, but the comments and the pain is killing me inside. My friend just asked me to rant my heart out. And so I did.

IBD has no cure and that sucks. And when they think they have one, it will be years before it will be proven because of clinical trials etc. And because of that, I feel like SCREAMING MY ****ING HEAD OFF BECAUSE SHPIUAHURIPVNROQNIOENC[OIWE!!!

Sorry

Its an invisible condition, so you may not see any physical changes (apart from looking more tired or skinnier) - which is why people make the assumption that you're completely fine - which is fine I guess. But, once people start asking questions, it puts me in an awkward position because I don't like talking about my IBD. I know that no-one would know what it is and then when they ask again, my response where I say 'its a condition where I **** blood basically and I lose a lotta weight'. No one understands the emotional pain I go through everyday - and of course I don't expect them to if they haven't experienced it. I also get the odd comments saying 'oh but you were fine last week'.

I've been reading this blog from someone called Sam Cleasby on her site called sobadass.me, which I suppose is helping because she has UC, has had it for 10 yrs, has 3 children and is so positive! On the other hand, its not helping because its making me think about the worse case scenario's and the flares etc. I was diagnosed 11 months ago, so I haven't had any flares yet, thankfully. But, I'm not prepared for when it does happen. Beginning to have the symptons from such a young age has in some ways scarred me because, I admit, I didn't have a clue what was going on. And then again, no one does at the age of 11. I even said to my friend today that I'm not prepared for **** like that, and when it happens, it will hit me hard and I dunno what the turnout would be.

I just want things to stop. It's never going to happen though. I can't magically ask for something that I know I'm never gonna get. I try to think positively but that thought of something I know will happen in a few days, a few weeks, month, years - whatever is just pulling me down, when I keep persuading my self to think that it shouldn't. I mean, thats why I created the Motivational Society, so that I could get some motivation from people to live through everyday. Not only me, but also fellow TSRians.

So this is me. I told you to bare the rant, and hats off to you if you've read till the end! If you'd like to post your own personal stories about coping through a medical condition, please feel free to or any advice on coping through everyday The people I have tagged are those I feel I'm quite close to on TSR

Thank you very much for reading,

ravioliyears xx

Really interesting.

Thanks so much for sharing.

Hey its me again. Nothing's gonna hurt me with my eyes shut. Remember that song lyric. You really inspire me, it mustn't be easy but honestly your a strong person.

Thank you so much! You know that you make it shine

Aww no problem. Have you heard Desire ft. Tove Lo? I prefer the original.

Omg ikr! No doubt, I love Tove Lo and her songs are AMAZING but that song.... Nopeee can't do it. The original is 1000 times better imo.

It's just ruined what is already an amazing song. I'm surprised they've released Desire now, it's a re release of the song that they released like last year I think. I wish I could see them in tour but they're touring Europe at the moment, have you seen them live?

Sorry to hear about your illness it must be incredibly hard to live with it, but a massive well done for sharing the way it affects you etc. Hope you feel better soon