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Why is it creepy for guys to check out girls but fine for girls to do the same?

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Reply 40

the bear

Original post by EricPiphany

What does 'check out' mean?

Reply 41

Retired_Messiah

Original post by Twinpeaks

Also "I'll admire dat ass if I damn well want to" is the epitome of objectification. I can stare at that body part no matter how uncomfortable I make the person it belongs to feel, for I give no consideration to the person whatsoever. All I see is an ass.

I can touch dat ass if I damn well want to.

I can penetrate dat ass if I damn well want to.

You seem to be assuming that men are the type to equate where they put their eyes with where they put their hands and penis, and that we do not assume that there are people attached to whatever parts we are admiring.

We are not that stupid.

Original post by Twinpeaks

You can't really understand why girls may find a gawky teenager dribbling over their "ass" a bit creepy?

What a lot of guys (such as yourself) don't seem to grasp, is the difference between a quick glance, and leering. If say I walk past someone and they shoot a quick subtle glance or smile, doesn't bother me. I probs do the same. But when someone is actively gawping at you... Drives me insane.

For example, I work in a uni library. One day I was standing on a stool to stack a top shelf, and I just glance to my left to find a boy sat leaning back in his chair, turned towards me, full on staring. When he realised I caught him he acted rather embarrassed, as you would. That kind of staring pisses me off. Unfortunately my natural reaction is always to quickly glance away because of awkwardness, I wish my first reaction would be to a muster up the perfect face of disdain.

You're assuming a lot about me when I purely said "dat ass" for humorous effect. I make a joke about asses, there is an immediate assumption made that I do not know the difference between glancing and staring, I do not understand the concept of feelings, and that I have the potential to escalate (which is probably the most ridiculous one)

sheesh.

Reply 42

Twinpeaks

Original post by Retired_Messiah

Not at all. Not at all. Why do you think I'm referring to "men" as a whole, and not just you, first and foremost?

Secondly. No not really. But I was just highlighting your insinuated complete disregard for the person receiving the staring.
"I'll admire that ass if I want to" suggests that you'll keep staring because you want to, no matter what the receiver feels. That is only a less extreme version of touching a person who does not want that touch. It's a complete disregard for the person on the receiving end. Simply touching a person can cause no more physical harm than staring at a person, so why do you see touching another as wrong, but staring at another as acceptable? You should respect the person on the receiving end, no matter whether you understand it or not.

Original post by Retired_Messiah

No no. Again missing the point.

You said you can't rationalise why women feel uncomfortable with being checked out. An then you proceed to say that it doesn't matter because you don't GAF anyway, and will admire a woman's arse no matter what.

Sometimes people say they've made a joke when in fact they are just saying what they really think but in a humorous tone to make it come across as more acceptable. Which seems likely given you can't understand why it makes women feel uncomfortable in the first place.

On another note.... Here is a double standard that's just come to mind:

A lot of men don't understand why women feel uncomfortable with being checked out. But a common thread on TSR and IRL involves a guy reporting how he becomes so annoyed at someone staring at his girlfriend. So women aren't allowed to be made to feel uncomfortable with males staring at their body, but the boyfriends of such women are allowed to feel annoyed with it.

(Y)

(edited 8 years ago)