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My dad just asked if I wanted to get engaged to a girl in a picture

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Original post by Anonymous
Seriously why are ppl acting if arranged marriages are the end of the world.
Believe it or not there are actually successful arranged marriages. Yes shock horror.
Srsly people grow up.


There are also successful lottery players. That doesn't mean that playing the lottery is a worthwhile enterprise for the average person.
Original post by Aristotle's' Disciple
Seriously why hasn't OP posted a picture yet :colonhash:


Continue to wait forever.
Original post by Hydeman
There are also successful lottery players. That doesn't mean that playing the lottery is a worthwhile enterprise for the average person.


Same can be said about love marriages then
Original post by BristolFresher15
There're too many variables I have to consider before going through with it, not just the fact that she's fit. :P


start with 'is she doing it for the VISA'
Original post by darkvibes
start with 'is she doing it for the VISA'


Well she obviously won't be doing it because she loves him so once they have a kid who cares?.

Do you want a boy or a girl OP? :colonhash:
Original post by Anonymous
Same can be said about love marriages then


No, it can't. :tongue: Marriages where both participants have taken the time to get to know one another and make an informed, mature decision to tie the knot are inherently more likely to be successful than ones negotiated over photographs and the odd FaceTime conversation (and with the slightly sinister incentive of a British passport), especially if, as in OP's case, the potential spouse being presented to him is from a different culture altogether.

(Inb4 divorce rate -- hardly comparable given the stigma attached with divorce (even in dire circumstances) in communities where arranged marriages are the norm.)
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by darkvibes
start with 'is she doing it for the VISA'


LMAO

Seriously, though, my dad doesn't even know anything about her. He said he wasn't sure how old she was, she estimated around my age. He also had no idea whether she was single or not. Just showed me her to see if I liked her, which was the most unnerving bit.
Original post by Aristotle's' Disciple
Well she obviously won't be doing it because she loves him so once they have a kid who cares?.

Do you want a boy or a girl OP? :colonhash:


Probably one of each. But let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Original post by BristolFresher15
LMAO

Seriously, though, my dad doesn't even know anything about her. He said he wasn't sure how old she was, she estimated around my age. He also had no idea whether she was single or not. Just showed me her to see if I liked her, which was the most unnerving bit.


Hahahaha, I can imagine his thought process. 'Oh she's hot' .... 'Beta, come here please I want to ask something of you!' :rofl:
Original post by Aristotle's' Disciple
Hahahaha, I can imagine his thought process. 'Oh she's hot' .... 'Beta, come here please I want to ask something of you!' :rofl:


:toofunny:
Original post by Hydeman
No, it can't. :tongue: Marriages where both participants have taken the time to get to know one another and make an informed, mature decision to tie the knot are inherently more likely to be successful than ones negotiated over photographs and the odd FaceTime conversation (and with the slightly sinister incentive of a British passport), especially if, as in OP's case, the potential spouse being presented to him is from a different culture altogether.

(Inb4 divorce rate -- hardly comparable given the stigma attached with divorce (even in dire circumstances) in communities where arranged marriages are the norm.)


Yes it can. Knowing the person years b4 you marry them doesn't always lead to a successful marriage. There's no statistic.
Nor does it increase the likelihood of a successful marriage. You have no proof.

With arrange marriage you can take however long you want to marry someone so you get to know them properly. It doesn't just happen in a day.
You don't just look at photos, this may come as a shock but you actually sit in the persons house and talk to them in real life.
Original post by Aristotle's' Disciple
Hahahaha, I can imagine his thought process. 'Oh she's hot' .... 'Beta, come here please I want to ask something of you!' :rofl:


Thats 100% accurate. He literally had no other information about her.
Lmaooo reminds me of the time when some woman came to my house with a pic of her son for me to look at :rofl:
Original post by Anonymous
Yes it can. Knowing the person years b4 you marry them doesn't always lead to a successful marriage. There's no statistic.


I didn't claim that it always led to a successful marriage, so I don't need any proof for that. Straw man.

Nor does it increase the likelihood of a successful marriage. You have no proof.


The women's happiness indices in countries where arranged marriage is the norm and divorce is considered taboo speak for themselves. And I'd point out that you don't have any proof for the opposite proposition, so even if you reject my reasoning, you can only justify sitting on the fence on the issue.

With arrange marriage you can take however long you want to marry someone so you get to know them properly. It doesn't just happen in a day.
You don't just look at photos, this may come as a shock but you actually sit in the persons house and talk to them in real life.


Gee, what a mitigator that little factoid is. :rolleyes:

To argue that that's the same as years of knowing somebody and being completely free of any family/societal pressures is to be far too economical with the truth for somebody who seems to be a keen empiricist.

By the way, you may want to be careful with the half-truths; I'm not some non-Asian Brit passing judgement on matters of which I've no experience. I'll notice if you lie. :wink:
(edited 8 years ago)
Crazy world you live in I suppose :tongue:
Original post by Biryani007
Lmaooo reminds me of the time when some woman came to my house with a pic of her son for me to look at :rofl:


Oooooh myyy god that must've been unbelievably awkward. What did you do?

It's kinda shallow isn't it? just assuming you'll wanna get with someone because of looks.
Original post by Squishy•
Oooooh myyy god that must've been unbelievably awkward. What did you do?

It's kinda shallow isn't it? just assuming you'll wanna get with someone because of looks.


That is pretty much all that they go on. That; whether the person is from a 'respectable' family; and their education or prospects too.

Superficial things like image are paramount to that society.
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Avatar for Zarek
Zarek
21
He just looking after your best interests. Either that or he's a dirty horse.
If I'm not married in 7 or so years, this is what my parents will be doing :puke:

I'd rather get married to someone from TSR...
Original post by BristolFresher15
That is pretty much all that they go on. That; whether the person is from a 'respectable' family; and their education or prospects too.

Superficial things like image are paramount to that society.


I had the 'respectable people' talk with my mum the other day and she said,
"Well back home, people have a different status and it's important to make sure that you marry someone with a very respectable background"

"But mum, they can't help which family they're born into can they?" I asked

"No, but they might be like their ancestors. You have to go for someone with a history of a high status, like one your father's family has."

"So much for high status when we're living below the poverty line here."

I think she might have cut me but she controlled herself

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