How to get revenge?

So my flatmate has become impossible to live with. She took the place off my friend because he had to leave the course.

Shes dirty and is currently playing very loud music.

I've confronted her about this and she does nothing about it. Just asked her if she could turn the music down and says sure and leaves its on full blast.

So its come to revenge. Any ideas?

P.S We're both 3rd years

(edited 8 years ago)

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1

PossiblyNotGod

What type of music (this is very important).

Reply 2

Davalla

Original post by vela1

Shes dirty

Give her a good spanking.

Reply 3

vela1

Original post by XOR_

What type of music (this is very important).

R&B

Original post by Davalla

Give her a good spanking.

She looks like a turd

Reply 4

PossiblyNotGod

Original post by vela1

R&B

Oh.. Sorry to hear that.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 5

Inazuma

Blow the fuse.

If she does it after 11.30 at night, keep calling the police on her lol.

Reply 6

somemightsay888

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Ex-lax-Maximum-Strength-Stimulant-Laxative/dp/B000052Y4I/ref=sr_1_9?s=drugstore&ie=UTF8&qid=1460899151&sr=1-9&keywords=laxatives

Execute Order 66.

Reply 7

vela1

Original post by somemightsay888

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Ex-lax-Maximum-Strength-Stimulant-Laxative/dp/B000052Y4I/ref=sr_1_9?s=drugstore&ie=UTF8&qid=1460899151&sr=1-9&keywords=laxatives

Execute Order 66.

Thought about this but a friend of mine was admitted to hospital after this prank was done on him. Ideally don't want a lawsuit.

Reply 8

vela1

I'll be leaving the property a month earlier. Anything that I could do? I'm already taking the router with me so she won't have internet.

C'mon guys, let your creativity go wild.

Reply 9

C-rated

buy or borrow a set of loud ass speakers, then play John Cenas theme at the highest volume until she agrees t stop her racket

Reply 10

vela1

Original post by C-rated

buy or borrow a set of loud ass speakers, then play John Cenas theme at the highest volume until she agrees t stop her racket

Thing is, its a house split into flats. Don't want to be disturbing neighbours.

Reply 11

a noble chance

Original post by vela1

R&B

Solution: Play this on loop at an even louder volume

9YYHc6SCXNc

Reply 12

trygauge42

My two favourite options :colone:

(1) go out at night when she is still there and swat your own accommodation
(2) del sys32.

Oh no pls don't ban me :eek:

Reply 13

C-rated

Original post by vela1

Thing is, its a house split into flats. Don't want to be disturbing neighbours.

Put it next to her wall and muffle the rest of the speakers, so the vibrations only travel through her wall

Reply 14

BWV1007

Check out these guys' YouTube channel, they have lots of cheap but painful pranks you could do at home.

Spoiler

Reply 15

Luke Kostanjsek

Original post by vela1

Thought about this but a friend of mine was admitted to hospital after this prank was done on him. Ideally don't want a lawsuit.

If you wanna avoid the lawsuit but play the same trick, go for these:

http://www.amazon.com/Haribo-Sugar-Free-Gummy-Bears/product-reviews/B008JELLCA

Read the reviews, they're hilarious. This is just one off the front page:

"Oh man...words cannot express what happened to me after eating these. The Gummi Bear "Cleanse". If you are someone that can tolerate the sugar substitute, enjoy. If you are like the dozens of people that tried my order, RUN!

First of all, for taste I would rate these a 5. So good. Soft, true-to-taste fruit flavors like the sugar variety...I was a happy camper.

BUT (or should I say BUTT), not long after eating about 20 of these all hell broke loose. I had a gastrointestinal experience like nothing I've ever imagined. Cramps, sweating, bloating beyond my worst nightmare. I've had food poisoning from some bad shellfish and that was almost like a skip in the park compared to what was going on inside me.

Then came the, uh, flatulence. Heavens to Murgatroyd, the sounds, like trumpets calling the demons back to Hell...the stench, like 1,000 rotten corpses vomited. I couldn't stand to stay in one room for fear of succumbing to my own odors.

But wait; there's more. What came out of me felt like someone tried to funnel Niagara Falls through a coffee straw. I swear my sphincters were screaming. It felt like my delicate starfish was a gaping maw projectile vomiting a torrential flood of toxic waste. 100% liquid. Flammable liquid. NAPALM. It was actually a bit humorous (for a nanosecond)as it was just beyond anything I could imagine possible.

AND IT WENT ON FOR HOURS.

I felt violated when it was over, which I think might have been sometime in the early morning of the next day. There was stuff coming out of me that I ate at my wedding in 2005.

I had FIVE POUNDS of these innocent-looking delicious-tasting HELLBEARS so I told a friend about what happened to me, thinking it HAD to be some type of sensitivity I had to the sugar substitute, and in spite of my warnings and graphic descriptions, she decided to take her chances and take them off my hands.

Silly woman. All of the same for her, and a phone call from her while on the toilet (because you kinda end up living in the bathroom for a spell) telling me she really wished she would have listened. I think she was crying.

Her sister was skeptical and suspected that we were exaggerating. She took them to work, since there was still 99% of a 5 pound bag left. She works for a construction company, where there are builders, roofers, house painters, landscapers, etc. Lots of people who generally have limited access to toilets on a given day. I can't imagine where all of those poor men (and women) pooped that day. I keep envisioning men on roofs, crossing their legs and trying to decide if they can make it down the ladder, or if they should just jump.

If you order these, best of luck to you. And please, don't post a video review during the aftershocks."

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 16

Eternalflames

My flatmates last year were quite dirty and lazy, they never took the bins out and never washed up their dishes. The kitchen stank, one minor thing I did was put the bags in front of their room doors and a silly thing was throw random socks and underwear from the laundry room with clothes detergent powder into their dirty sink

They still didn't clean up, ****ing bastards

I suggest you take some ketchup and put it on a sanitary towel and stick it to her door! :biggrin:

Reply 17

vela1

Original post by BWV1007

Check out these guys' YouTube channel, they have lots of cheap but painful pranks you could do at home.

Spoiler

See I want to do this (without the mouse traps), but shes such a retard, she'd just knock all the cups over and they'd be water everywhere which she won't clean up. This would lead to the room below the bathroom getting damp. My landlord is a great guy so I don't want to give him this grief.

Reply 18

vela1

Original post by Luke Kostanjsek

Thanks will be buying these.

Reply 19

RMNDK

- You could put superglue on her phone or speakers or whatever, just make her stuck to something.

- Cut off a bit, or a chunk, of her hair.

- Create a profile for her on some dating website (or some random spamming website), don't put the address, but put the number so that she's spammed with random messages constantly.

- Install a virus on her laptop, or delete some important files.

- Place some fecal matter into her food

- Buy some handcuffs and chain her to the bed or table leg when she's sleeping. Then throw kitchen utensils at her when she wakes up.

- Burn any of her notes, or dissertations, or any memory sticks (or potentially sell em).

- Get a syringe and fill it with sunflower oil. Sedate her with some sleeping pills and then inject the oil into her face (like this https://goo.gl/qy2AuW)

- Hammer a rusty nail into her toe, in the place underneath the toenail.

That's all I can think of for now. Maybe this'll inspire you.