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how to overcome performance anxiety

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Agree that you're not going to attempt intercourse for a while. That will take some pressure off (and if you have an erection while she's ready, you can ignore the agreement and go for it...)

During that time, have a read of Bernie Zilbergeld's books, 'Men & Sex' or 'The New Male Sexuality' - the latter is the second edition of the first, originally titled 'Male Sexuality', but there's no much difference. At least one person is usually offering one of them for 1p+postage on Amazon (it's M&S at the moment, I see...) It has a very good programme of exercises, alone and with a partner, for getting control over this.

My other thought is to wonder if you're actually sleeping together. If so, do you wake up with an erection?
Original post by unprinted
Agree that you're not going to attempt intercourse for a while. That will take some pressure off (and if you have an erection while she's ready, you can ignore the agreement and go for it...)

During that time, have a read of Bernie Zilbergeld's books, 'Men & Sex' or 'The New Male Sexuality' - the latter is the second edition of the first, originally titled 'Male Sexuality', but there's no much difference. At least one person is usually offering one of them for 1p+postage on Amazon (it's M&S at the moment, I see...) It has a very good programme of exercises, alone and with a partner, for getting control over this.

My other thought is to wonder if you're actually sleeping together. If so, do you wake up with an erection?


Thanks for the advice.


The difference now is that we have properly talked about it together so I do feel a bit of pressure has been relieved. However when we woke up this morning I thought she was going to initiate sex and I could feel myself getting a little stressed about it.

Yes when we sleep together I wake up with an erection and even during the night sometimes when we are spooning etc.
Oh well, i think my relationship with this girl is about to end. A shame because I do really like her, but she's been acting differently the past week and I think she's probably going to tell me we shouldn't see each other anymore.

I think I'll just have to stick to casual sex, this whole thing has put me off relationships with girls I actually like.

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