Boyfriend is really clingy and won't let me revise for A Levels

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My boyfriend is amazing but he's really clingy. I have exams in about two weeks and I keep telling him I need to revise. He works so he comes back at about 6:30 and I'm home by 5. We usually talk until we fall asleep when he comes home, but it's becoming an issue because he's always wanting to talk so I hardly have any time to revise. He tells me to work hard and make him proud but doesn't leave me any time to do so, -and gets upset with me when I tell him that I need to do work instead of talk. Any advice on how to get him to give me some space?

Reply 41

hippieglitter

Go somewhere else to revise libraries, cafes even a local park when the weather is nice, me and my best mate used to love taking our books to the park and sitting in the sun. Turn your phone off so he can't contact you. Talk to him, Tell you need to work and if you don't you'll fail your exams.

Reply 42

Blackstarr

He is just a waste of space, literally.

Reply 43

sxphieds

Original post by Anonymous

I left my boyfriend for my exams. He kept saying "you work too hard" and I finally sent him a long paragraph about why working is important to me and how I needed his support right now, and he said "I need to take care of my own needs too." That's when I lost my patience (at least internally).
He needs to respect you and your space. If your relationship can only survive by fulfilling his need for constant validation it is not healthy. Either go to the library to work (if you go to an independant/non chain cafe, buy a drink every hour!! I've seen cafes go out of business because they let too many people stay and work), or ask him for a two week break.

If he won't allow you that, consider that he might be suffocating you. Would your soul survive long term?

Reply 44

Anonymous #1

Original post by sxphieds

You are so brave. I don't think I could do that... Personally I don't think it's something to break up over because I know my boyfriend would understand. That's really admirable though, I hope you do really well x

Reply 45

gutenberg

Original post by Anonymous

There's one problem I have though, everyone is saying to revise until about 8:30 or 9 but the thing is that he works 12 hour shifts because he's got a managerial role. So he has to wake up at 3 in the morning to be at work for 5, and obviously I don't want to be keeping him up because he needs sleep, I've spoke. To him and he doesn't mind waiting but it's just a bit mean I suppose :frown:

Why don't you agree to chat for half an hour or similar before he goes to sleep? Then he goes to bed and you continue working for a bit longer. You'd have to be 'strict' in keeping it to the time agreed and not spend hours talking, but if he needs to sleep then it might act as an incentive for him to keep it short.

Reply 46

smellybelly1991

Original post by Anonymous

Tell him to grow up and realise you NEED time to yourself, especially when you've got exams coming up..sounds like he loves you, which is cute..but he also needs to respect the fact that when you're at home you can't just switch off (until the summer at least) and that its your time to study