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How to get over anger and wanting revenge on someone?

After a bad and weird relationship with someone, I ended it because I couldn't carry on with the mental manipulation anymore. It was the right thing to do but because he was far away at the time (I explained it over message) I felt like his apologies were very insincere. I feel like he got away with all that he did, and now the thought of it is eating me up inside. It may sound dramatic but there are a lot of awful things that I wouldn't want him to do to someone else, so it less of a personal hatred and more of a reassurance that he might actually change his behaviour.
Reply 1
Original post by Mega/n
After a bad and weird relationship with someone, I ended it because I couldn't carry on with the mental manipulation anymore. It was the right thing to do but because he was far away at the time (I explained it over message) I felt like his apologies were very insincere. I feel like he got away with all that he did, and now the thought of it is eating me up inside. It may sound dramatic but there are a lot of awful things that I wouldn't want him to do to someone else, so it less of a personal hatred and more of a reassurance that he might actually change his behaviour.
As useless as it sounds, just try not to think about it. Maybe see someone else if that'll distract you and not harm you, or else immerse yourself in some hobby or another.
How long ago did you end it?
Is he still in your life, or was there a clean break?
just remind urself

Reply 4
Original post by Davide_online
How long ago did you end it?
Is he still in your life, or was there a clean break?


We haven't spoken for a few weeks, it wasn't a good break at all
Original post by Mega/n
We haven't spoken for a few weeks, it wasn't a good break at all


That's not very long. Could you see yourself postponing the decision about revenge etc while you work through the grief process? I'd say there's a good chance of your having a different attitude a few months down the line, and if you act now you could regret it later on.

What are your options for tackling the anger without seeking revenge?
Reply 6
Original post by Davide_online
That's not very long. Could you see yourself postponing the decision about revenge etc while you work through the grief process? I'd say there's a good chance of your having a different attitude a few months down the line, and if you act now you could regret it later on.

What are your options for tackling the anger without seeking revenge?


Going to therapy
Sounds a positive option.

When could you take the first step to find a suitable therapist?
Therapy.

Ex partners do stuff all the time. It doesn't give you a reason to seek revenge, and in 99% of cases it only serves to worsen someone's life (perhaps multiple people). Drop the revenge mentality, and get on with your life. :smile:
Reply 9
I'm going to become a hermit and avoid men for the rest of my life :smile:

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