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I'm really scared about Uni

Everyone seems to be super excited about uni and I can't see the excitement. I'm so scared of leaving home and all my friends, and that I won't make friends at uni. Like seriously I'm really not good with talking to new people or integrating properly. I am honestly totally useless at home and I just cannot see my self living by myself.
I'm really scared that the course is going to be too hard as I am struggling with A-Levels and having failed year 12 and retaking I'm already behind and have had too many bad experiences with failing.
I feel like I'm not ready but I really don't want to take a gap year now that I have a uni placement.
I feel so sick just thinking about it and no one seems to understand that this scares me so much, I've tried talking to friends and family but they really don't get it.
Please I need so advice or reassurance or something
Original post by Kaita
Everyone seems to be super excited about uni and I can't see the excitement. I'm so scared of leaving home and all my friends, and that I won't make friends at uni. Like seriously I'm really not good with talking to new people or integrating properly. I am honestly totally useless at home and I just cannot see my self living by myself.
I'm really scared that the course is going to be too hard as I am struggling with A-Levels and having failed year 12 and retaking I'm already behind and have had too many bad experiences with failing.
I feel like I'm not ready but I really don't want to take a gap year now that I have a uni placement.
I feel so sick just thinking about it and no one seems to understand that this scares me so much, I've tried talking to friends and family but they really don't get it.
Please I need so advice or reassurance or something


We're all gonna make it brah/grill ! :hugs:
Reply 2
Avatar for Asolare
Asolare
20
RE Friendships - self-fulfilling prophecy; if you think you can't make friends, you won't make the effort to, thus you fulfill the prophecy.

A lot of people are gonna be in the same boat, heck I have friends who are 21 years old that can hardly manage living alone by themselves, no-one expects people at your age to have it all under control.

A lot of people will be anxious and share the same fears even if they don't state it, you just need to try and chill out and look forward to one of the greatest eras of your life :smile:
Reply 3
Avatar for yoda123
yoda123
15
You're not alone trust me
I'm sure you've heard it before, but when you start uni, everyone is in the same boat. Nobody knows what they're doing, but it's always good to go through that in a community of people who feel the same way and you can figure it out together. Sometimes, friendships just happen, other times you might have to put a lot of effort in. The truth is that it's harder not to make friends than it is to make them. You'll find tonnes of people who feel as worried as you (e.g. I've shared some of your concerns too). :smile:
Original post by Kaita
Everyone seems to be super excited about uni and I can't see the excitement. I'm so scared of leaving home and all my friends, and that I won't make friends at uni. Like seriously I'm really not good with talking to new people or integrating properly. I am honestly totally useless at home and I just cannot see my self living by myself.
I'm really scared that the course is going to be too hard as I am struggling with A-Levels and having failed year 12 and retaking I'm already behind and have had too many bad experiences with failing.
I feel like I'm not ready but I really don't want to take a gap year now that I have a uni placement.
I feel so sick just thinking about it and no one seems to understand that this scares me so much, I've tried talking to friends and family but they really don't get it.
Please I need so advice or reassurance or something


You will make so many new friends for life, your friends can stay with you at uni go to cool freshers events, uni friends are not just friends they are like family they are all in the same boat, everyone is in the same boat as you so if your not good at talking to people you will end up talking about assignments, lesson etc anyway and make tonnes of friends! I am not a social person too be honest I come to uni to work lol. But despite that I have made loads of friends without trying.

I dropped out of college! Got a D, E and 2 U's at A/S Level I am graduating in a few weeks with a first class honours!

I am also super blonde can hardly spell and don't get me started on Algebra and I have done well at uni! You will be fine you will love it! Good luck

PS - everyone at uni is totally useless at living by themselves you'll live off pot noodles etc anyway haha. Seriously these will be the best years of your life!...I'm 24 and they are so far anyway
Original post by Kaita
Everyone seems to be super excited about uni and I can't see the excitement. I'm so scared of leaving home and all my friends, and that I won't make friends at uni. Like seriously I'm really not good with talking to new people or integrating properly. I am honestly totally useless at home and I just cannot see my self living by myself.
I'm really scared that the course is going to be too hard as I am struggling with A-Levels and having failed year 12 and retaking I'm already behind and have had too many bad experiences with failing.
I feel like I'm not ready but I really don't want to take a gap year now that I have a uni placement.
I feel so sick just thinking about it and no one seems to understand that this scares me so much, I've tried talking to friends and family but they really don't get it.
Please I need so advice or reassurance or something


Hello :smile:

First of all, what you are feeling is completely and utterly natural. It's a split - someone students are excited for university, but they'll always have their doubts and then there are others they are completely and utterly scared for it.
As I've said, it's natural what you're feeling. University is and can be scary but it'll be okay! It's the build up that's horrible and getting there with everything on your mind, you have to get there and just get stuck into it before all of these worries will pass.

When you move out, everybody is in the same boat. On moving in day, you'll talk to people and make friends without even thinking about it. Everybody is there, moving in, busy - you just say hi to people and at the end of the day when family has left, everyone falls together for the most part.It's normal to be scared of leaving home but it'll be okay - you'll make friends at university, especially on your course. At the same time you can join socities and what not to make other friends. If you feel useful at home and that's scaring you - start practising at home to do things. Try doing your own washing and ironing, buy a student cook book and make some meals - recipes are easy to follow and practice makes perfect, try your own shopping etc. It's easy to pick up but you could practice now! University is challenging but the uni experience is competely different to any other education - you're focusing on the subject you want to study and that's important. It'll be challenging but a good challenge.

I do understand how you're feeling because when I was about to start university I was losing my mind. I couldn't stop overthinking everything and I was panicking about everything, every small detail and it didn't stop until I got there and submerged myself into the university life. I promise you, you will be okay. Just open up and embrace the feeling and the life that is coming your way. You'll take so much from it and you'll grow as a person!

Best of luck, try to calm down!
Same here , im not even ready:L
If you're really worried about living by yourself, then ask your parents to let you help them with chores around the house, like cooking and cleaning, so that you can learn how to do them. That's what I'm going to be doing next summer. (I'm too busy with work atm. Doing some cooking this summer though)

Like others have said though, you won't be the only one at uni who can't cook or clean. Apparently loads of people go to uni without knowing how to do any house chores at all. But you'll have plenty of time to practice while you're at uni, and most chores are pretty easy. (though I guess I have a slight advantage because my parents made me do loads of chores when I was a kid xD)
Reply 9
Avatar for CatL8
CatL8
7
Original post by Kaita
Everyone seems to be super excited about uni and I can't see the excitement. I'm so scared of leaving home and all my friends, and that I won't make friends at uni. Like seriously I'm really not good with talking to new people or integrating properly. I am honestly totally useless at home and I just cannot see my self living by myself.
I'm really scared that the course is going to be too hard as I am struggling with A-Levels and having failed year 12 and retaking I'm already behind and have had too many bad experiences with failing.
I feel like I'm not ready but I really don't want to take a gap year now that I have a uni placement.
I feel so sick just thinking about it and no one seems to understand that this scares me so much, I've tried talking to friends and family but they really don't get it.
Please I need so advice or reassurance or something



Ahh I am so glad I've found your post, I was about to make a very similar one! I am very worried about leaving home (more than I thought I would be), some days I am fine but other days (like today) I have an awful feeling of dread/panic about it. if I speak to my mum about it, or get upset, she says stuff like 'I dont think you're ready', and she starts doubting me which makes me feel worse even lol.

Literally NONE of my friends are going to uni, they are all taking a year out/staying in our hometown, so I can't really talk to others about it. I also struggle to make close friends, I get on well with most peeps but have a hard time 'clicking' with people properly.

I know in my head I must get a degree to pursue the career I want, and that ultimatley uni is about the qualification at the end of 3yrs, however leaving home seems so difficult to get my head around at times.

How far away will you be from home if you go? Also, do you have a part-time job/ or done work experience at home?

I can't help much really, but I really know what you're feeling and it's good to know I'm not the only one :smile:
Reply 10
Avatar for Kaita
Kaita
OP
3
Original post by CatL8
Ahh I am so glad I've found your post, I was about to make a very similar one! I am very worried about leaving home (more than I thought I would be), some days I am fine but other days (like today) I have an awful feeling of dread/panic about it. if I speak to my mum about it, or get upset, she says stuff like 'I dont think you're ready', and she starts doubting me which makes me feel worse even lol.

Literally NONE of my friends are going to uni, they are all taking a year out/staying in our hometown, so I can't really talk to others about it. I also struggle to make close friends, I get on well with most peeps but have a hard time 'clicking' with people properly.

I know in my head I must get a degree to pursue the career I want, and that ultimatley uni is about the qualification at the end of 3yrs, however leaving home seems so difficult to get my head around at times.

How far away will you be from home if you go? Also, do you have a part-time job/ or done work experience at home?

I can't help much really, but I really know what you're feeling and it's good to know I'm not the only one :smile:



Its nice to know that other people are feeling what I'm feeling, it makes me feel more normal.

I'm actually not that far away from home, its only about 2hrs away maximum. But i don't really find that a major problem because i feel really lonely i can just go home for bit. I dont have a job or anything at the moment, i was maybe thinking of doing one over summer but I'm not sure yet.

I guess it's not really the leaving home thing that scares me as much as the leaving everything. A lot of my friends have already gone to uni (because i had to repeat year 12) and they come back I can tell how much they have changed :s-smilie: They seem so different, and often not in a good way. I guess im really worried about becoming like them...
Think about it, you chose universities that are far away from home so that must indicate that you want a change.




Posted from TSR Mobile
Reply 12
Avatar for Kaita
Kaita
OP
3
Original post by babyshawte
Think about it, you chose universities that are far away from home so that must indicate that you want a change.




Posted from TSR Mobile


I don't really follow this logic. I haven't picked a uni far away its like 2hrs max from my house and less than that on the trains. The distance has nothing to do with my decision anyway, no matter what uni i chose I still don't like the idea of change...
Original post by Kaita
Everyone seems to be super excited about uni and I can't see the excitement. I'm so scared of leaving home and all my friends, and that I won't make friends at uni. Like seriously I'm really not good with talking to new people or integrating properly. I am honestly totally useless at home and I just cannot see my self living by myself.

You'll make friends, unless your sole purpose is shutting yourself in away from everyone else. I had the same concern with making friends, and initially I didn't, but if you attend socials and what have you then you'll most likely make friends.

As for being complete useless at home, in what respect(s)? Cooking for example?


I'm really scared that the course is going to be too hard as I am struggling with A-Levels and having failed year 12 and retaking I'm already behind and have had too many bad experiences with failing.
I feel like I'm not ready but I really don't want to take a gap year now that I have a uni placement.

No university on this planet will accept you if you haven't demonstrated aptitude in your subject area, that accounts for something if you have an offer. When you get to university they'll have the correct facilities that'll suit your needs, be it exam arrangements (if applicable) and most universities will have an open door policy whereby if you're struggling, you can visit them

You've got an online forum, with students, and clever ones at that, which a majority of the time are willing to help. Utilise it. Those that get the grades are those that utilise all possible tools etc, be it talking with the lecturer at the end of the lecture, or visiting a forum such as this for advice and guidance.

I feel so sick just thinking about it and no one seems to understand that this scares me so much, I've tried talking to friends and family but they really don't get it.
Please I need so advice or reassurance or something


Hope it helps!
Original post by Kaita
Everyone seems to be super excited about uni and I can't see the excitement. I'm so scared of leaving home and all my friends, and that I won't make friends at uni. Like seriously I'm really not good with talking to new people or integrating properly. I am honestly totally useless at home and I just cannot see my self living by myself.
I'm really scared that the course is going to be too hard as I am struggling with A-Levels and having failed year 12 and retaking I'm already behind and have had too many bad experiences with failing.
I feel like I'm not ready but I really don't want to take a gap year now that I have a uni placement.
I feel so sick just thinking about it and no one seems to understand that this scares me so much, I've tried talking to friends and family but they really don't get it.
Please I need so advice or reassurance or something


I remember making a post like this around this time last year with the same fears. Thought i wouldn't make friends, thought i'd be out of my depth regarding my course etc... To be fair, it's been on of the best years i have had in agess

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