I have this double standard and I know it's wrong

You know you're wrong but still pursue it. Can you get any lower?

Guys we all know OP is in the wrong for having the mentality he does, but if you're not going to offer anything constructive then don't just come on here to insult him and call him names. That's childish and not helping out anyone.

As for you, OP, it's not okay for you to do all that stuff then expect to be with a perfectly religious girl. It's one or the other.

Either you practice your religion in a devout manner and expect your future wife to be the same, or you carry on with the lifestyle you have and be brutally honest with any future potential wife you come across, and be ok with her having done the same things you've done.

I know right! He asked for help,advice and people just came on the thread to attack him thinking they are better! Like what the hell!

I know right! He asked for help,advice and people just came on the thread to attack him thinking they are better! Like what the hell!

People are better than him if they're not going to attempt to cheat/ deceive or lie to someone who is pure. Do you honestly think that hes going to tell that girl the truth?

People are better than him if they're not going to attempt to cheat/ deceive or lie to someone who is pure. Do you honestly think that hes going to tell that girl the truth? If he did, either her dad would batter him or she'd do it herself. please don't get into the habit of thinking Zina is acceptable or should be forgiven. It is a grave sin and shouldn't be taken lightly. He will ruin that girls life. He'll expect someone that he wont get...and he'll criticse her daily. I know how this story ends..I've seen over and over again. usually with a divorce and single parenthood and we all know how many single parents with kids get remarried.

Yeah I agree. I mean they call this place a 'community', you would assume people wouldn't be so judgemental and would actually try to offer others advice, but I guess not.

No no trust me nonmuslim TSRians in relationship threads are soo kind and helpful. Its just certain stuck up muslims are hateful when muslims with weaker iman ask for help

I never said Zina was acceptable. Allah forgives people no matter what the sin
and if OP repents and becomes a better Muslim than YOU then why wouldn't he want a religious wife? He just needs to tell the father and potential wife he was bit of a loose cannon in the past!
Why you acting as if your God saying we are any better than him? Your attitude disgust me. Satan caused him to slip into a grave sin. Just be thankful Allah has protected you from that sin. Stop being arrogant that you were fortunate to have the mentality to not commit zina. Excuse me? You know how the story ends? What are you Allah? Can you see the future? Have you talked to a fortune teller or something. OMG you seriously think your a know it all right? You believe grave sins such as zina cannot be forgiven. I bet you there are thousands of muslims in the past who committed zina and asked for forgiveness and Allah forgave them.

Not a muslim but good to see you are taking the forgiveness route, as opposed to attacking him like many other users and condemning him to a life of sin/impure marriage just because he is human and made mistakes in his youth.

I never said Zina was acceptable. Allah forgives people no matter what the sin
and if OP repents and becomes a better Muslim than YOU then why wouldn't he want a religious wife? He just needs to tell the father and potential wife he was bit of a loose cannon in the past!
Why you acting as if your God saying we are any better than him? Your attitude disgust me. Satan caused him to slip into a grave sin. Just be thankful Allah has protected you from that sin. Stop being arrogant that you were fortunate to have the mentality to not commit zina. Excuse me? You know how the story ends? What are you Allah? Can you see the future? Have you talked to a fortune teller or something. OMG you seriously think your a know it all right? You believe grave sins such as zina cannot be forgiven. I bet you there are thousands of muslims in the past who committed zina and asked for forgiveness and Allah forgave them.

Gosh you're bloody annoying.
Satan caused him to sin huh? I'm sure if he killed someone that would be Satans fault too right?
Um no, can't just say Allah saved you. Some men actually make the effort too you know it's not that hard to keep your pants on .
OP is pathetic and a hypocrite, are you really surprised why people are giving him hate for it?
He hasn't even said he stopped those disgusting acts, he wants a wife that's not like him. But I hope he gets someone worse .

OK It appears Annonymous 5 and Annonymous 7 are sinless. They clearly don't believe satan can cause a man to sin. They believe OP is pathetic for committing zina and wanting a pious wife, perhaps he is. At least he know it.

I'm a Muslim guy and I drink, go to nightclubs and do stuff with girls(i.e. grinding). I am also not a virgin and lost my virginity to a random girl who I don't even know the name of. I do follow aspects in the religion such as I do pray most of my prayers(on average 3-4 a day), and I do eat only Halal. I also like researching the religion and gaining more knowledge.

Anyway, as I'm getting older, I'm starting to think of marriage. I really wouldn't like to marry a girl that goes to nightclubs, never mind drinks. And as for the virginity thing, it is extremely important for me that I marry a girl that has not had sex with anyone before(unless special circumstances). I would also much prefer it if she hasn't been involved in any Haram relationships before too(i.e. pre-marital). I would also prefer to marry a Hijabi girl, and have got my eyes on one in particular who doesn't know that I get up to all of this.

I know it is completely a double standard and it is wrong to think like this, but I don't know where to go from here.

I'm a Muslim guy and I drink, go to nightclubs and do stuff with girls(i.e. grinding). I am also not a virgin and lost my virginity to a random girl who I don't even know the name of. I do follow aspects in the religion such as I do pray most of my prayers(on average 3-4 a day), and I do eat only Halal. I also like researching the religion and gaining more knowledge.

Anyway, as I'm getting older, I'm starting to think of marriage. I really wouldn't like to marry a girl that goes to nightclubs, never mind drinks. And as for the virginity thing, it is extremely important for me that I marry a girl that has not had sex with anyone before(unless special circumstances). I would also much prefer it if she hasn't been involved in any Haram relationships before too(i.e. pre-marital). I would also prefer to marry a Hijabi girl, and have got my eyes on one in particular who doesn't know that I get up to all of this.

I know it is completely a double standard and it is wrong to think like this, but I don't know where to go from here.