Where to meet slightly older guys?

I've always been friends with older people so meet them through friends etc

how did you meet these older friends in the first place?

fair enough, what if i said that my degree of choice was a longer one (almost double that of normal degrees) and almost guaranteed employment at the end ? Is there that much of a difference between say a 22 y/o in their last year of uni and a 23 y/o who's just graduated? What about a 21 y/o who has graduated, but a 22 y/o who is doing a second degree? The argument doesn't hold much water

why couldn't someone at uni also be ready to settle down? being of uni going age and being mature/ready to settle down aren't mutually exclusive guys don't generally tend to look for 'career women' in particular, and prefer younger girls just because, no need for exceptions. Trying to understand where you're coming from but it's not making much sense to me

How old r u?

I'm not trying to make any sort of argument at you or tell you that the type of guy you're looking for wouldn't want to go for you. I don't really know anything about you.*As I said, I'm sure there are many guys of that sort who would be happy to go for someone who's still at uni, it's hardly a total deal breaker.

However, speaking from my own point of view (I'm 26, graduated 5 years ago and have a good job) I think it's fair to say that, all else being equal, most guys in that position would usually find that, when it comes to settling down, they'd prefer someone who has completed their education and begun their careers. I myself endured several inconveniences of being with someone who is studying medicine and has another couple of years left.

That's not to say they wouldn't go for you - they may well do. I'm just wondering what it is about you that would make them prefer you over every other graduate woman who'd be available to them. There are many reasons why they might (as I did), so it's just worth considering which of those reasons apply to you.

I see Just curious, what kind of inconveniences did you come across , things like distance or time?

Being at university comes with many commitments that may conflict with the commitments of being in a "settled down" relationship with someone who's well into their career.

For example, if that person got a job in another city, would you be able to go with them?

Are you be able to give your full time and attention to them, even during exam season?

What if they want to have kids, would you be able to do that whilst still at university?

*What if they want to come home to their partner and talk/complain/ask for advice about something happening with them at work, would you be able to communicate with them on that level, even having never experienced it for yourself? Would you both feel perfectly ease and not at all out of place amongst each other's friends, given that they're all of a different age and at a different stage of life?

Would you be totally financially dependent on him, seeing as you're not working yet?

Some of these kinds of issues especially apply to someone doing a degree like medicine. Not only is their degree longer, but their job immediately after graduating involves some long and seriously unsociable hours, and it's no guarantee that you'll get one in the location of your choice.

Being at university comes with many commitments that may conflict with the commitments of being in a "settled down" relationship with someone who's well into their career.

For example, if that person got a job in another city, would you be able to go with them? Are you be able to give your full time and attention to them, even during exam season? What if they want to have kids, would you be able to do that whilst still at university? What if they want to come home to their partner and talk/complain/ask for advice about something happening with them at work, would you be able to communicate with them on that level, even having never experienced it for yourself? Would you both feel perfectly ease and not at all out of place amongst each other's friends, given that they're all of a different age and at a different stage of life? Would you be totally financially dependent on him, seeing as you're not working yet?

Thanks for your replies, you've given me a lot to think about I do think that if it came down to it, my priority would be a family (or building up towards a solid relationship to start one eventually) as opposed to my career, although the reality is i can't be 100% in control of how things will pan out!

This is very true. It's easy to plan exactly how everything's going to work out, but it's also inevitable that there will be many major issues, difficulties and unforeseen circumstances that you haven't even thought of yet, both from your side and your partner's side. The ones I mentioned are just the tip of the iceberg. You seem quite optimistic about being able to navigate those issues comfortably, but believe me when I say from experience that it's much easier said than done.

People do a lot of rapid growing up immediately after university when it properly hits them that they're a professional rather than a student. So in answer to your previous question, yes, there are huge differences between a*22 year old in their last year of uni, a 23 year old who has just graduated, and a 24 year old who has worked for a year. There are also huge differences between someone who has worked for a year and someone of the same age studying a second degree.

I think it's for that reason that, the sort of guy you're describing would usually prefer to go for someone a couple of years older than you who has completed university (all else being equal), to minimise these sorts of risks and restrictions, and to get someone who's more on their wavelength. Not only that, but they'd usually prefer someone who's completed their education and begun their career for many of the same reasons you would.

Like I say, that doesn't mean you have no chance with a guy like that, it just means that, because what you want is quite different to "usual, standard practice" and presents its own obstacles accordingly, you should think about whether you and your situation are really exceptional enough for it to be suitable for you. It may be, but it's definitely worth thinking about.

What do you suggest someone in my position do the? Go for guys my own age (of whom many aren't ready to settle down just yet/still figuring out who they are)? Or wait until guys my age have matured and hope for someone in a few years?

Why do so many men end up with younger women then if it's so fraught with obstacles?

I think you have to figure out what suits you.

Most girls about your age are probably more focused on doing well in their degree and making the best of their potential career. They're probably having short term relationships, not necessarily thinking that the person they're with is the one who they'll ultimately settle down with, and just taking life as it comes in that sense. It's very difficult at that stage to already settle on who they're going to spend the rest of their lives with, because their futures are still so uncertain.

But there might be good reasons why your situation is different and it's not suitable for you to do what's normal for girls your age, I wouldn't know about that. All I would encourage is to think about these kinds of decisions holistically, and from the other person's point of view as well.
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It's not exactly that going for a younger woman is fraught with obstacles.*It's more that going for someone at a very different stage of life to you has obstacles.*That's why, for example, a five year age gap is a lot if an 20 year old is with a 15 year old. But if an 80 year old is with a 75 year old, it's not really much of an age gap, there isn't a lot of difference between them.

As I said, people grow up a lot immediately after leaving university, during their first year or two of their career. So at that stage the difference between someone in university and someone in a career is more pronounced than you might expect.

But even then, no relationship is ever perfect, and there are obstacles everywhere. So in some cases, putting up with certain obstacles to be with someone might be worth it for the qualities they bring that other people don't.

Do you have any ideas regarding the question in my OP? Like which sorts of places/activities will put me in contact with slightly older professional guys (thats not hook up oriented like tinder or seedy bars lol)?

The kinds of bars that these professional guys go to usually aren't "seedy", they're usually located near major employers (e.g. in the city of London) and are just a place to go after work around 6pm and get a casual drink with some colleagues.

Similarly I'm sure there are some dating sites (particularly the ones you have to pay for) where people are more committed to finding serious relationships as opposed to a quick and easy one night stand.

I suppose you could also think if any mutual friends or family members can introduce you to anyone they know.

Girls from experience where do you meet guys who are in their mid-late twenties? I'm at uni and most people are 21/22 or younger but i prefer slightly older guys who are a bit more mature and settled.

Guys feel free to chime in too if you have good ideas through experience from mates or such!

Download Pokemon Go and go to a Pokestop in London you will find thousands. Original Pokemon is for people born in the early-mid 90s therefore Pokemon is the new Tinder.

Ive thought about doing that but aren't they just going to be really nerdy shut ins though? lol

like i want a decently attractive person not someone who hasn't been out of their moms basement in a while. I may just be mischaracterising pokemon go players :LOL: