What to do about someone who emotionally isn't ready?

I've been friends with a girl since we were very young and a few months ago I realised that I liked her and I told, and she told me she may like me but wasn't sure. Fast forward a few months (different universities) in which I'd done everything to show I really liked her and she could trust me etc. and we've become even.

We've kissed for the first time and all is good. Then late on I get a message saying that she isn't emotionally ready for a relationship, but does want us to be something. I say I'm ok with this. We're ok for a few days and then she goes on holiday and I feel like something is wrong. I know that she's having a great time and want to leave her to it, but we've gone to speaking almost everyday/some sort of interaction to her not really communicating with me at all and I get this vibe that something is wrong.

I don't know what to do. I like her a lot but it's got to the point where I've made all the first moves. I sent her gifts, I told her I liked her, I kissed her, but she hasn't initiated anything in response and this hurts me and now I don't know why she won't speak to me like before. I know she has mental health issues which make her scared of relationships but I've done all I can to show her I'm worth it and despite all the above, I know she likes me.

*She's coming back next week and I'm just tempted to not get in contact with her until she makes the next move. I don't know what else to do at this point. I know you'll all probably just say to move on but I wouldn't be able too even if I tried even though this is kinda ruining my summer because it's all I can think of.

*What else do you think I can do/make of the situation?

Reply 1

midgetspinner

18

Have other girls on the side so you do not get emotionally attached to one

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by glebp

Have other girls on the side so you do not get emotionally attached to one

Haha even if I wanted to there are no girls or guys in my home town that I am even remotely attracted to in that way so no luck there.

Reply 3

Protoxylic

14

I get you, sometimes no matter how much you want it, how hard you try, how much you love them, sometimes the best option is to follow your brain in this situation. No matter how much your heart wants them, sometimes a relationship just adds stress rather than relieves it. A relationship at the end of the day is supposed to compliment ones life, not add unnecessary stress. If you think deeply and think what's best for them, no matter how much it hurts, sometimes you just have to bite the bullet.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Protoxylic

I get you, sometimes no matter how much you want it, how hard you try, how much you love them, sometimes the best option is to follow your brain in this situation. No matter how much your heart wants them, sometimes a relationship just adds stress rather than relieves it. A relationship at the end of the day is supposed to compliment ones life, not add unnecessary stress. If you think deeply and think what's best for them, no matter how much it hurts, sometimes you just have to bite the bullet.