Ordering new provisional / id help

Hi guys,

Basically last week I went out and lost my provisional licence and I've been panicking all week as I was confused at what to do and did NOT want to tell my parents... My passport also went out of date JUN16 and so it's not valid as ID

Today I ordered a new application online for my provisional and that said it would take 7-10 days to come, and then it said my licence would arrive within 3 WEEKS of sending the application.

My A-level results are on August 18th (26 days away) and I was wondering how long my license will actually take to come? I'm hoping it will come in a week but I really can't risk 3 weeks ): what do you think?

ALSO- can I get into clubs with an expired passport? The picture still looks like me and I have my bank card with my signature on to prove its me??

Any advice would be great thanks! (: