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I just found out something shocking about my Mum..

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Original post by Anonymous
You are still wrong. You are conflating knowledge with emotional impact ie you think that knowing that something is a common event (and yes, miscarriage is certainly common) is going to make it less upsetting.


Think I will just agree to disagree with you. Its personal and my opinion differs from yours.
Reply 21
See I was expecting it to be nearer my mum's recent revelation to me. Her 'dad' (my granddad) is not actually her dad and she was the result of her mother cheating. So her older sister and younger brother are both biologically only half-siblings. Then she found out her biological father had died before she ever had the chance to meet him.
Original post by Little Popcorns
Same thing happened to me my mum.

My friends mum has...wait for it... 9 miscarriages before having his little sister O.O


Oh wow, that is really sad. :frown:


It happened to my mum too when she was quite young.

Also when my mum had IVF later on the other 2 embryo's didn't survive, I could have had 2 other siblings the same age as me, that would have been lovely I think :colondollar:
(edited 7 years ago)
Imagine how awful it was in previous centuries when maybe half of children died before their 5th birthday. Think of poor Queen Anne who had 17 pregnancies ( at least) and none of the babies lived to be grown up and she was the Queen so presumably had the best care there was. Just one tragedy after another all her life.

We are lucky to live in the 21st century in this country and have an NHS.
Original post by Anonymous
I understand why she didn't tell me and that's fine. I just feel a sense of sadness and loss over my potential sibling. Thanks for your wish! I will always continue to support her. I do have two siblings, sister and brother. She got pregnant 2 months after the miscarriage and had my brother on Christmas Eve!


But if she hadn't had that miscarriage, she wouldn't have had your brother instead (because she'd already be pregnant with a different baby).

My mum had 3 (I think) between me and my sister, but I don't feel sad about them apart from feeling sad for her having to go through that. I don't feel like they were siblings I never knew, they just weren't meant to be, and I wouldn't have my sister if one of them had survived.
My grandma accidentally told me 10 years ago that my mum had a miscarriage before I was born. My mum still doesn't know that I know, and she's never spoken about it.
Original post by Helenia
But if she hadn't had that miscarriage, she wouldn't have had your brother instead (because she'd already be pregnant with a different baby).

My mum had 3 (I think) between me and my sister, but I don't feel sad about them apart from feeling sad for her having to go through that. I don't feel like they were siblings I never knew, they just weren't meant to be, and I wouldn't have my sister if one of them had survived.


I guess that's true. I just feel like I missed out on a sibling, she could have still got pregnant again after but I guess it wasn't meant to be :frown:
Original post by 999tigger
If you realise how common and natural it is, then you would be less upset. Thats why people leave it till after 3 months before announcing it.


I do understand about people waiting for 3 months, that's fine. But just because it may be seen "common or natural" DOESN'T mean I don't have the right to be upset over my potential sibling
Original post by shawtyb
my dad would have been a twin but the same happened


Hate miscarriages!
Original post by Anonymous
I do understand about people waiting for 3 months, that's fine. But just because it may be seen "common or natural" DOESN'T mean I don't have the right to be upset over my potential sibling


I never said you didnt.
Original post by cvslfc123
The same thing happened to my Mum about 20 years ago. It's a bittersweet thing because if that baby had survived then my youngest brother who was born in 2000 may never have come along. A few years ago she told me something that shocked me, I had a twin who died in the womb.


It's shocking how common this is!
Original post by randdom
My mum lost a baby at 5 months when I was two. I have always known that it happened and while it is obviously sad if she had gone on to have that baby then I wouldn't have had the younger sister and brother that I did have growing up which doesn't bare thinking about. I can understand though that it must be a shock to have just found out now.


I can understand why my Mum didn't tell me and it's fine, just a shock that I could of had another sibling. I'm thankful for my younger sister and brother though, it all worked out in the end I guess. 2 months later she got pregnant again and gave birth on Christmas Eve to my brother! ☺️
Original post by Little Popcorns
Same thing happened to me my mum.

My friends mum has...wait for it... 9 miscarriages before having his little sister O.O


Wow, that's really sad! May they rest in peace 🙁
Original post by BobSausage
See I was expecting it to be nearer my mum's recent revelation to me. Her 'dad' (my granddad) is not actually her dad and she was the result of her mother cheating. So her older sister and younger brother are both biologically only half-siblings. Then she found out her biological father had died before she ever had the chance to meet him.


Wow 😳
Original post by pickup
Imagine how awful it was in previous centuries when maybe half of children died before their 5th birthday. Think of poor Queen Anne who had 17 pregnancies ( at least) and none of the babies lived to be grown up and she was the Queen so presumably had the best care there was. Just one tragedy after another all her life.

We are lucky to live in the 21st century in this country and have an NHS.


That's true, thankfully we have NHS!
RIP!
She's just ****ed up in the head! No offence lol
I'm the third (and last) child, my mum had a miscarriage inbetween me and my sister... I feel a little guilty tbh, I only got this shot at life because somebody else didn't make it. Makes you think, doesn't it. What could have been.

One of my teachers had been trying for 15+ years for a baby, had like 6+ miscarriages (that I know of - I'm sure there were more). Had two rounds of IVF and last year finally have birth to the most beautiful baby girl. They love her to PIECES and I'm so happy for them ^^

Miscarriages suck, they're so sad... Don't even know how I would cope if it was me. Women and their partners who get through them are so very strong.
My mum's had 3...
They will be a lot more common now because women are waiting until their late 30s and early 40s to have children

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