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The fibs your teacher told you in school [golden thread]

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Original post by Fox Corner
:shock: that's scary...!


absolutely terrifying! :biggrin: eventually i realized no goblins were crawling up my skin so i started lying again :P
"At my previous school, someone leaned so far back on their chair that they fell and cracked their head open".



...
Our biology teacher told me I shouldn't go into forensics because I'd have to taste stomach acid to tell what killed a person. Turned out that this used to be a method of doing toxicology but is way outdated and very much against health and safety.

On a less gross note, My chemistry teacher told there was no hope of me getting into my first choice, three years later I graduated from that exact university. Don't know if it counts as a fib, but it certainly didn't ring true.
Original post by Propyl Pear
Our biology teacher told me I shouldn't go into forensics because I'd have to taste stomach acid to tell what killed a person. Turned out that this used to be a method of doing toxicology but is way outdated and very much against health and safety.

On a less gross note, My chemistry teacher told there was no hope of me getting into my first choice, three years later I graduated from that exact university. Don't know if it counts as a fib, but it certainly didn't ring true.


Now, did your Chem teacher say that to mock you or to encourage you to work harder and prove her wrong?
This wasn't from our teachers but everyone in my junior school believed 100% completely that if you managed to escape from school without going through the gate you were allowed to go home.

There was a patch of worn down bricks in the corner of the playground. Every break someone would be kicking at those worn out bricks trying to break through so we could all go home.

:ninjagirl:
Original post by Fox Corner

Yep I remember that one. No earrings because you might rip your ears off!


One of our dinner ladies had ears that had been ripped by earrings :yes:
Original post by raniafern
Now, did your Chem teacher say that to mock you or to encourage you to work harder and prove her wrong?

He told me that a couple of days after my final exam, so I really hope he wasn't trying to get me to work harder.

Either way, it's not the correct thing to say. There are ways of making a student work harder (especially one with a passion for said subject and who was A* throughout GCSE and had only fallen to a B) without telling them that all hope is lost on them.

On the plus side, he gave me a great example of what I don't want to be in the classroom.
Oh and my teacher did tell us that "if you miss your offer grades on results day you should phone up your firm and beg for a place".

:nope:
Here's my list of fibs;
-"It's not that cold" says the PE teacher in the jacket
-"Running for 30 minutes isn't that hard" says the PE teacher in the chair
-"No eating" says the teacher eating a roast dinner
-"Your peroid is no excuse to get out of PE" says the male PE teacher
-"It doesn't take 10 minutes to get changed" says the PE teacher that doesn't have to.
Paying for a maths book that was close to irrelevant, in the hope of getting back my money when I return the book, but I didn't.
You will get back the money when you bring back the book, they said. :K:
"This is the best year this school has ever seen. You will get the best results the school has ever had."

Ended up with only 33% of us achieving 5 A*-C including English and Maths
Reply 231
That I was going to get a E whether I liked it or not and that the teacher "quite frankly" didn't care. I got an A* but I'm pretty sure that's because I wanted to prove her wrong like it was life or death. :wink:
There was always that story about that kid who swung back too far on his chair and died or cracked his head open lol :colonhash:

One teacher tried to tell us that she was allowed to keep us after school without parents permission if we misbehaved and tried to enforce it too. Unsurprisingly, she got fired.
"You got an A in your French writing assessment". Needless to say I was a bit shocked on results day when my French grade breakdown went A*A*AD (a D in writing, turns out my very first pieces of coursework I wrote right at the beginning of year 10 were sent)
Reply 234
I remembered my teacher this year who told us that for our Geology class we will go on the field, but strangely the week we were supposed to go she was sick. Ok, but what if I tell you that it is the third year she is "sick" the week she has to go on the field ?? :frown: :frown: Still sad, I loved Geology.
Original post by Squishy Pixelz
Here's my list of fibs;
-"It's not that cold" says the PE teacher in the jacket
-"Running for 30 minutes isn't that hard" says the PE teacher in the chair
-"No eating" says the teacher eating a roast dinner
-"Your peroid is no excuse to get out of PE" says the male PE teacher
-"It doesn't take 10 minutes to get changed" says the PE teacher that doesn't have to.


Well someone hates PE says the boy who doesn't have to do PE anymore.
This will definitely not come up in the exam 👍🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
Original post by junayd1998
When they tell you to stop rocking on your chair because " they knew someone who cracked their head open doing it" no you didn't boss.


In all honesty that happened to two kids at my primary school.... as in cracking their heads open.
If I sucked his d**k in the storage closet he'd predict me an A for my UCAS application. The **** only predicted me a B.
Ohhh if you carry on doing that work that well you'll get a B.... found out post exam my ICT GCSE was capped at a D and we'd been lied to for the last two years :colonhash:

Well that was my attempt of a career in ICT over.

Original post by Student403
"I had a lad named Big Phil in my PE class. Good lad - captain of the school's basketball team. One day he forgot to take off his ring before a match. He went up to try and shoot, got his ring caught in the hoop and ripped his whole hand off. So take off all your jewellery now."


Our school used to allow a single plain ring, the rule was flaunted though and nobody ever paid much notice. However we got a new anti-climb fence to stop kids going off to the shops during lunch and break (the previous fence was only about a metre high). A guy and a Girl ripped their fingers off within a week of each other due to catching their rings on the studs at the top of the new fence. Didn't stop us climbing the fence to go to the shops, but as soon as two years later all the new kids were passing it off as an urban myth spread by teachers.
(edited 7 years ago)

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