Totally lost the will to live

A long time ago, actually. But it's worse now. I can't even call my life life anymore it's just 'existing'. I just rely on sedatives to get me through the day. Or alcohol, or both And now that even he doesn't want me anymore, things are even more dull. Sleep. Depressing music. Watch something. Spend most of the day on the sofa/bed. WALK THE DOG YAY. Sleep. Cuddle the cat. Convince my friends that I'm fine, and that I really don't want to go out. Convince my family that there;s not a single thing that's wrong with my mind. Convince everyone that I'm really not hungry and nah what do you mean my bones are sticking out and anyway you've dumped me so you won't even feel them when we **** anymore ha. Annoy him with my drugged/drunken self. Annoy people online with my drugged/drunken self. Sleep. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I don't even want advice. I am posting this so that you all can realise what wonderful lives you all have (hopefully!) And because I'm bored. and because i can

Well, remember that some people don't have the options that you do So, your life is not that bad. I could guess you have tried to speak to someone professional. You just have to remember that nobody will be able to help you as much as you can help yourself. However, I do hope and wish you all the best. I hope this is just a small time of your life. Keep going and keep trying

That actually sounds like a lot of fun

I'd recommend going to see a professional and working through things, just take things slowly and find a goal to work towards and that'll hopefully help you.

Things are never as bad as you think they are.

Good luck!