Long distance relationship?

My boyfriend and I have been overwhelmed that we got accepted into our firm universities. He will be going to Oxford for Physics and I will be going to Cambridge for Maths. We have been together since year 12 and with all the excitement of going to university - we haven't discussed about our relationship when we're going to be apart for an extended period of time.

I'm not sure how to bring it up without dampening the mood of us going to university. Do long distance relationships work most of the time? Are there any successful stories out there?

Reply 1

Kevin De Bruyne

Original post by Anonymous

I wouldn't say give up hope just because you've heard or get the impression that they don't really work out, but I imagine it to be quite demanding anyway. Have a talk, and if you do decide to break up.. one thing one of my mates did recently was to spend a day together and then see her off at the airport in the morning, and they broke up but kind of half-agreed that they may or may not get back together after she was back from abroad a year later if they were both still interested.

Goals

My boyfriend and I were long distance for three years (roughly the same distance between Oxford and Cambridge). We've been living together for a while now and buying a house; so yeah it can work if you both want it to. Like SeanFM already said discuss it and decide what you both want to do.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by SeanFM

That sounds like an interesting arrangement.

Original post by Anonymous

Wow, did you guys Skype each other? Meet up during holidays?

Reply 5

Dewsy

I was with my girlfriend throughout the 3 years at university in a LDR. We just made an effort to call each other rather than only text and at the beginning of each term plan 2 or 3 weekends when one of us would visit the other.

The one piece of advice that I would give following my experience is to book weekend visits in advance. I found that by the time I got to uni it would be very easy to rule every weekend out for one reason or another. Sure you may miss things here and there, but ultimately there are very rarely things that you*can't miss. For me, missing the odd night out for example was worth it.

We're now engaged, so LDRs can definitely work!

Reply 6

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

That sounds like an interesting arrangement.

Wow, did you guys Skype each other? Meet up during holidays?

We would meet up every other weekend and I'd stay at his during the holidays (he'd already graduated when we met, I was in second year); after I graduated we met up every weekend. Used to chat on Skype between meetings.*

Reply 7

Sempiternitas

Hey, OP. I'm in a similar situation where I'm in Oxford and my boyfriend is in Cambridge. We met when we were both students in Oxford but he decided to move to Cambridge for his masters last October. Today actually marks our third anniversary, so it can definitely work out.

The most annoying thing is travelling: the cheapest way to get between Oxford and Cambridge is a bus that takes a bit less than four hours (unless one of you manage to keep a car at uni!), so you'd probably want to stay at each other's place for at least a couple a days. I definitely agree with Dewsy's advice of booking weekends in advance - there's always some event going on at uni so it's good to know before you say yes to everything!