The pressure for masculinity is harder than for femininity

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Another thing, my good friend's mother is a midwife and when I went to their house few weeks back, she was telling us some of the outrageous experiences a lot of her male colleagues go through. You can say, it's because culture was involved but she explained a big case took place at her recent work placement where the family of the woman giving birth made a complaint to management team at Queens hospital simply because he is a man that delivered their baby. They tried sugar coating it with 'him being too touchy and unprofessional' but everyone who knows him, apparently knows he is very professional and good at what he does. The family even asked for another midwife because they were that uncomfortable and those who were there i.e nurses said they didn't witness him being inappropriate but rather he was doing his job. A lot of these families who complain seem to come from South Asian backgrounds and some are at times are religious so I don't know if with certain cultures don't agree with a man operating on a woman if she's naked. The family of the lady and the lady herself were bengali Muslims. I have bengali friends and when I brought up the story were shocked. The poor guy had to shift wards for nothing. I'll always bring this up because I don't think it's fair.

Reply 41

macromicro

Original post by Twinpeaks

If you prefer an easy life, then yeah it's easier to succumb to the pressures of 'femininity'. But if you prefer a more successful life, it's easier for a man.

I think this is the most accurate conclusion.

The OP's points are for the most part factually accurate, however it does not address the underlying fact that women want more pressure. They want to be in the workforce in highly successful positions rather than at home; they want to test their courage and overcome fear; they want to be as independent as men after many years of dependency.

At the moment, it's completely true that men are under more pressure but what man doesn't enjoy this pressure overall? And more to the point, what person doesn't enjoy this pressure? Overcoming fear develops virtues. Being practical develops useful skills. Aiming for difficult careers rather than staying at home allows you to enjoy more power, responsibility, influence - and develops you as a person. You experience more and are valued more in society. As the intelligence levels of the human race keep rising, want for pressure will increase.

The only issue I think we do not want any longer is body image desires and sexual pressures (slut vs stud being the most irrational and the most religious). We are no longer animals in the wild. Being muscular serves no purpose and is but a hangover from our less civilised, less intelligent times. Equally, women being overly-lean with synthetic assets is nothing more than an attempt to be only a flower that attracts the bees. This is less important when they are attractive via other, more substantial, factors like success, ambition, interests, intelligence, etc.

To put it in perspective, and all else being equal (e.g. facial features), I think most men of above average intelligence would rather be with a woman - for the long-term - of average body fat with average curves but with higher than average influence on the world/intelligence/importance/value in society, than vice-versa. And this trend will crystallise as we progress.

Reply 42

Nirvana1989-1994

Original post by macromicro

The title is the OP's claim that he has provided an argument for.

How it works is you give reasons to refute that argument it or support it.

Or just embarrass yourself. Whatever works for you.

Okay.

Seen as it's the Internet and I'm not particularly fussed.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 43

username1044970

I think both genders have their own problems and pressures, and instead of taking the "well your problems are not real/not as bad as mine" attitude, as a society we should be more sympathetic and work to resolve these issues simultaneously.

Reply 44

Cherry82

Original post by Dima-Blackburn

Aww, *gives a warm hug*. You're seriously amazing. Guys and girls, this is the approach we need in all honesty.Let's stop the divisions. With this approach, we could really move forward as a community and society.

Reply 45

username1044970

Original post by Cherry82

Thanks

And agreed :smile:

Reply 46

Twinpeaks

Original post by L'absurde

In the US more men are raped than women if you include prison rapes.

I agree with OP, it's much harder to be a man in the west these days thanks to feminism. If you're a straight white male you're the scum of the earth apparently. A woman lives as a man for 18 months and witnesses just how hard it is. Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQ2fREo3Tjc

What a stupid post.
Firstly to assume that all reported rapes equate to all rapes is incredibly naive or ignorant.

And I'm not even going to respond to the latter.

Reply 47

GUMI

Original post by Princepieman

???????

Prison rape is completely different, the environment in prison is completely different to being out in the open.. And it's a forced unisex arrangement.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Sorry to butt in, I know this is late but most rapes do not happen "out in the open". Most rapes they happen between two people who know each other and take place in doors. But whatever, I'm not here to argue

Reply 48

L'absurde

Original post by Twinpeaks

What a stupid post.
Firstly to assume that all reported rapes equate to all rapes is incredibly naive or ignorant.

And I'm not even going to respond to the latter.

Well, in prison I don't see the benefit in reporting the rape (especially a false one)...I doubt "snitches" are treated kindly.
"216,000 prisoners are raped per year in the U.S., compared to about 90,000 reported rapes outside prison"
Both (in prison and outside prison) are reported cases. I can only hope you missed that and didn't only read the first sentence of the article.

And of course not.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 49

Twinpeaks

Original post by macromicro

This is exactly what I was referring to.
I'd rather struggle to have a more successful, more fulfilled life than chose an easier life, that experiences less struggles but leads to less achievement.

My mother chose the stay at home life for many years, and she later experienced depression and anxiety. Now this can be attributed to many factors, but I think one of her main struggles was that she had no identity, no life outside of the family. She was simply a "mother." And then when her children grew up, she felt like she lost her identity and value, as she was no longer needed as a mother. I know this to be true because she more or less said it.

She then established a career and a life of her own and is now a different person, much happier.

I think whilst some women still enjoy the stay at home lifestyle, and who are we to judge them, everyone is different, many women are now seeking for a much more fuller life.

Although, I think I will add that women are more likely to experience discontent being stay at home mothers now than 40 years ago because we now have pressures to have careers as men do. If a woman decided to be a stay at home mother now, she would be judged by many. So in essence, women experience pressures to have careers and be parents, but many also desire to be both career women and mothers.

So the basis for the OPs argument is out dated to say the least.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 50

Twinpeaks

OPs argument kind of reminds me of a debate between siblings as to whose life is easier.

One sibling is deemed more intelligent, more capable, stronger and braver than the other. So the family places more pressure on that sibling to succeed, to bring pride upon the family, and to always do the right thing.

Whereas the other sibling is considered by his family to be relatively unintelligent, a bit of a no hoper, and is often the one who depends on everyone else. Because of this, no one places pressure on him/ her to succeed, and if they do something a bit silly, no one blames them because that's just them, being them.

Which life is easier, but which life would you prefer OP?