How did you not have a basic grasp of contraception at the age of 18. Didn't you ever think oh **** maybe I should actually use a condom. I'm a decade older than you and it probably wouldn't be the end of the world if I got pregnant but I'm still ultra safe - it's called taking some responsibility and control of your life! *
It's simple. I didn't have an abortion because I didn't want to have an abortion.
And I have taken some responsibility, I'm having a baby. I'm prepared to put my own life on hold to raise my child. I've lost several friends because they didn't want to be seen with me. I've worked hard for and saved every penny I have. I may not have made a responsible choice in the beginning but I am being responsible now.
It's not the end of the world that I'm pregnant, there are worse things out there.
Yes I did think that I should've used a reliable method of contraception but I can't go back now, what's the point of dwelling in the past?
Did you get pregnant intentionally? Or did you not use contraception....?
If yes: how do you feel knowing that you've just wasted your life?
I'm sorry but why does it have to be wasting your life? My brother and his wife conceived their first child at 15, they now live in Germany, both with very successful careers, married with two other kids. (one born only a month ago)
Ah that's ace I'm sure you will be a great mum. Did u want to go to uni? What's are your plans now?
Thank you. Yes I planned to go to uni, but found out I was pregnant during my application process. I was going to defer but I doubt I'll be ready next year so I'll just have to wait a couple of years before I go. Still upset about that, but I just remember why I'm doing this. My plans are to go to uni once my child is maybe one or two. I did want to live away in halls, since that's no longer possible I'll just commute. My college thankfully allowed me to sit my A level exams in the summer which was really nice of them so now I have one less thing to worry about. My boyfriend works full time so he'll be the main provider. We have a savings account with some money aswell and both of our parents have said they'll help.
I'm sorry but why does it have to be wasting your life? My brother and his wife conceived their first child at 15, they now live in Germany, both with very successful careers, married with two other kids. (one born only a month ago)
First of all, 15? Childbirth must've been traumatic at that age. Plus that's just anecdotal. Doesn't prove anything. I'm sure we can find exceptions to every trend, you might wanna look at my post below...
First of all, 15? Childbirth must've been traumatic at that age. Plus that's just anecdotal. Doesn't prove anything. I'm sure we can find exceptions to every trend, you might wanna look at my post below...
Spoiler
Actually said it was her easiest birth
And I'm not saying it's the norm, but it DOES show that not every child is doomed (nor that the parent's lives are ruined) that is born to a young mother. The girl says her support system is good. I know plenty of people who are doing fine (my mother and one of my sisters included, both having children under 20 as well. And several people I went to school with).
It's just an age though. I'd rather have a loving 18 or even a 16yr old as my parent as opposed to a 30yr old parent who couldn't care less about me
Of course: but ceteris paribus, the tremendous gulf of knowledge, wisdom and stability—both emotional and financial—which separates eighteen from thirty will have non-trivial implications for the quality of your child's upbringing. Indeed, the fact that you're even proffering the above rebuttal (essentially, a straw-man predicated on a false dichotomy) is itself a case-in-point; you'll by no means make a bad parent, but your prior lack of restraint has almost certainly disadvantaged your offspring insomuch as anyone remotely suited to that role at 18 would have been exponentially better qualified another decade or so down the line.
Notwithstanding, your attitude is at least a constructive one, but assuming your own parents were at all competent themselves I would strongly recommend soliciting as much advice from them as humanly possible before you embark.
Of course: but ceteris paribus, the tremendous gulf of knowledge, wisdom and stability—both emotional and financial—which separates eighteen from thirty will have non-trivial implications for the quality of your child's upbringing. Indeed, the fact that you're even proffering the above rebuttal (essentially, a straw-man predicated on a false dichotomy) is itself a case-in-point; you'll by no means make a bad parent, but your lack of restraint has almost certainly disadvantaged your offspring insomuch as anyone remotely suited to that role at 18 would have been exponentially better qualified another decade or so down the line.
Notwithstanding, your attitude is at least a constructive one, but assuming your own parents were at all competent themselves I would strongly recommend soliciting as much advice from them as humanly possible before you embark.
Do you go to Oxbridge? Because you should
But anyway, I understand most of what you've said and I agree. I would've liked to wait a little longer, but I was just showing that age is as important a factor as other things
But anyway, I understand most of what you've said and I agree. I would've liked to wait a little longer, but I was just showing that age is as important a factor as other things
Beautiful names You shouldn't really care what everyone around you thinks(the 'negatives', I mean) There are so many 'success stories' out there with young parents- it's just that the 'failures' are heard of more. Don't be afraid to share your success -I hope- later on like the MILLIONS that were (due to social pressure), and prove it's not as bad as they think...
On another note, If I were you I'd get married first
It's simple. I didn't have an abortion because I didn't want to have an abortion.
And I have taken some responsibility, I'm having a baby. I'm prepared to put my own life on hold to raise my child. I've lost several friends because they didn't want to be seen with me. I've worked hard for and saved every penny I have. I may not have made a responsible choice in the beginning but I am being responsible now.
It's not the end of the world that I'm pregnant, there are worse things out there.
Yes I did think that I should've used a reliable method of contraception but I can't go back now, what's the point of dwelling in the past?
just can't get my head round the passive attitude. It's like this baby has happened TO you. You must have had ambitions? Not saying you can't still fulfill those but I'm sure anyone would agree it's immensely harder once you've got a kid in tow. If you're anti abortion surely that would be even more reason to actually use contraception?! The mind baffles.*