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I want to drop out

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Reply 20
Original post by Epistemolog y
Sorry. Just take a gap year then and get a part-time job travel and find an interest. Are you hapy with your grades and univeristy maybe retake some modules?


Don't worry about it :smile: thats what I was thinking of doing just not about how to get around my parents :/ I'm thinling of going back next year to get a degree to teach English as a foreign language :smile:
Reply 21
Original post by VictoriaCoolio
I'm in the same position too. I just feel like I'm pushing above my brain. I'm in an even worse position than you I have to uni this year or my mum will send me to Nigeria or kick me out of the house. And I'll be homeless. Or I'll have to find a job. People are saying that I'll have live with these mistakes I make in life. It's just really shameful to be forgetting things at a young age in life. My sister is using me is what I've seen from this and she was jealous of my school experience. I'm just set on going back to school again but I can't because my parents will kick me out of the house. I do have money but I'll have to look for a job. And my dad says if I take a gap year I'll be stuck at Mac Donald's fact and just wasting another year of my life.


Hi, I'm sorry to hear that you're in such a bad position and that your parents aren't being supportive of your decisions :/ people are also telling me that I'm making a mistake and that I'm going to regret it but I guess its not up to them to decide that :wink: so are you going to drop out and look for a job? I've done a lot of thinking, and I think that I'm going to look for a part time job and do an online course TEFL course to get a certificate to teach English as a foreign language, mostly because it will look good on my CV and it's something I've thought about doing in the past. Then I will go back to uni to study English. Since I've told my parents about this they have started to accept the idea. Maybe if you come up with a plan your parents will be more supportive too.
Good luck!
Reply 22
Original post by VictoriaCoolio
I'll probably drop out and find a job and go back to school and try to get professional help

Oh ok, I hope everything works out for you :smile:
Reply 23
Original post by VictoriaCoolio
I've also been told by people that if I drop out whilst here I can stay in accommodation and find a job to pay for things.

Oh that's great, at least that would allow to take the time you need to work things out :smile:
Original post by megmrsh
Hey :smile:
I've been in uni studying history for about 3 and a half weeks now, and I've realised that I'm not on the right course. I've tried to talk to my uni but theey wont let me change course, and I'm really miserable and depressed. I've decided I want to drop out of uni, but my parents are totally against it even though they know I'm depressed (and I have anxiety). I want to take a gap year to work and maybe travel, and then sign up for a different course next year. Has anyone here been in a similar situtuation? Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with my parents and convince them it wont ruin my life?
Thanks xxx


Hello, I'm a 4th year student at uni and I felt the same way, and completely regret not dropping out back in year 1. ( my course is 5 years long)

I will highly advise you to drop out if you are feeling like it is the wrong course for you, because the depression and anxiety will only get much worse. The decision is yours to make.
Reply 25
Original post by Its Just That Dude
Hello, I'm a 4th year student at uni and I felt the same way, and completely regret not dropping out back in year 1. ( my course is 5 years long)

I will highly advise you to drop out if you are feeling like it is the wrong course for you, because the depression and anxiety will only get much worse. The decision is yours to make.

Hi, I'm sorry you feel that way :frown: at least you have't got that much longer to go :smile: yes I feel like I need to, I don't to feel worse than I already do. Thank you for your input and advice :smile: xxx
Reply 26
Original post by VictoriaCoolio
Is to possible to defer your entry and stay in the halls at the same time.


I honestly don't know maybe, it probably depends on where you are
Reply 27
Original post by VictoriaCoolio
My student finance money has already come through ao it's too late now. I'm screwed.

Oh no I'm so sorry :'( isn't there anyone you can talk to to try and get around it? Maybe if you can explain your situation to someone they might be able to sort something out?
Reply 28
Drop out, seriously. I couldn't tell you how much I wish I could go back and tell my 18 year old self not to stress so much over the decision. I wound up waiting until the end of my first year as I couldn't bring myself to tell anybody, which was dumb.

Going to university later than 18 might feel like a disaster scenario now whilst other people you know are off starting their courses, but you've got time on your side believe me, so take some of it. Finding work or travelling during your year out would no doubt help.

A gap year can be invaluable for some people. It can be difficult to develop real interests, or aspirations, with the constant pressures of school or college and lack of time to contend with. The time out could help you more than you'd expect.
Reply 29
Original post by Cll_ws
Drop out, seriously. I couldn't tell you how much I wish I could go back and tell my 18 year old self not to stress so much over the decision. I wound up waiting until the end of my first year as I couldn't bring myself to tell anybody, which was dumb.

Going to university later than 18 might feel like a disaster scenario now whilst other people you know are off starting their courses, but you've got time on your side believe me, so take some of it. Finding work or travelling during your year out would no doubt help.

A gap year can be invaluable for some people. It can be difficult to develop real interests, or aspirations, with the constant pressures of school or college and lack of time to contend with. The time out could help you more than you'd expect.


Sorry for the late reply, but thank you for your opinion. I think a gap year could help me, forcing myself to stay wouldn't be a good idea and wouldn't help me in any way :/ What did you do after your first year? Did you change course or take a gap year?
Reply 30
Original post by megmrsh
Sorry for the late reply, but thank you for your opinion. I think a gap year could help me, forcing myself to stay wouldn't be a good idea and wouldn't help me in any way :/ What did you do after your first year? Did you change course or take a gap year?


No problem! I took a gap 5 years :lol: Because I had no real idea of what I wanted to study, and didn't want to get it wrong a second time. Hopefully if you already know it won't take you that long! But I would still encourage you not to jump into a course that you're unsure about.

I've done a few things in that time. Worked full-time, studied part-time, spent some time living and studying abroad. It wasn't until I was 22 that I found something that I truly enjoyed studying, and i've been self-studying that subject for the past 2 years. I'm applying now to return to university next September.

It's taken me longer that I expected, but I don't regret taking the time to work things out.
Reply 31
Original post by Cll_ws
No problem! I took a gap 5 years :lol: Because I had no real idea of what I wanted to study, and didn't want to get it wrong a second time. Hopefully if you already know it won't take you that long! But I would still encourage you not to jump into a course that you're unsure about.

I've done a few things in that time. Worked full-time, studied part-time, spent some time living and studying abroad. It wasn't until I was 22 that I found something that I truly enjoyed studying, and i've been self-studying that subject for the past 2 years. I'm applying now to return to university next September.

It's taken me longer that I expected, but I don't regret taking the time to work things out.

Oh ok lol, :smile: you're right about taking your time to think about what you want to do, it's better than wasting time and money! I'm pretty sure about what I want to change to so yeah hopefully it won't take me too long :wink:
I dropped out of uni and my dad disowned me. But it was the best decision of my life. I took a few months off to figure out what I wanted to do, and then reapplied for a different course, at a different uni. I'm so much happier now than I was before and I feel so much more prepared.

Your life is YOUR life. You have to do what you think is right and what's best for you. No one else can make those decisions, no matter how hard it is. I feel like your parents will understand your decision, as long as you give them a plan for the future. It's not the end of the world, you can still have full funding for another degree if you want.
Reply 33
Original post by VictoriaCoolio
5 gap years. That sounds awesome. I'm happy to know that I still have that option. Some people are still doing their GCSEs at age 50. But I'm just feeling like if I go bak to school. I'll have to pay tonnes of money to pay for my exams and my eating. And I'll have to pay towards rent. I'm also thinking of the disappointment I'll cause to my family. They won't kick me out or send me away. But they'll be so angry.


There's been plenty of good times, as well as times when I felt completely lost and unsure what I was doing. But it was all necessary for me to work out what I wanted to do. My current course choice was never even on the radar when I was 18/19 years old, where as now it's massive part of my life. An interest turned serious I suppose, which is the way it should be. If you're finding it difficult to decide on a subject then you're probably not ready to commit to one (Which shouldn't worry you at 18... I don't feel you're told that enough at that age)

Almost all of the pressure i've felt over the past 5 years has stemmed from a desire to make sure I wasn't disappointing my family, or falling behind friends who were doing well. In truth, my family have never stopped me from doing anything or questioned any decision i've made, so I probably worried too much. But whether your family are vocally against the decisions you make or not, you shouldn't let it cloud your judgement too much or you'll keep on making poorly thought out decisions in an attempt to please others. I've made a few for those reasons myself.

It was only once I stopped looking for the quickest and easiest route to please my family and decided to commit the time and effort to a complete change of paths that I stopped worrying about my future and felt I was moving forwards.
(edited 7 years ago)
I did this with Nursing halfway through the year. I loved the course but because of my (at the time) undiagnosed Personality Disorder, I was too erratic with my moods to cope with the practical side of the course.

I dropped out, took about 2 years out working, then enrolled onto a Business and Management degree with my local college in association with the University I was accredited from. I got a 2:1 in the end instead of failing.

So, my advice, do it. Take the year, build up some cash, have a good think and work out what the best course of action for YOU is.
The OP has only been reading for 3 and a half weeks, not 3 and a half years!
Reply 36
You can apply to other courses and universities through ucas as a independent candidate, while still on your current course, if you're worried about dropping out straight away. I did that last year. Then when you have a place on another course you can drop out and take a semi gap year. Try and get a job or work experience during that time to make it worthwhile if you can.
Reply 37
Starting at Uni is daunting and it may or may not be the course, but the whole change from home & school you're struggling with. Talk it over with a counsellor at Uni and clearly articulate what course you want to do, why you want to do & why you're passionate about it. Try to fathom what it is that is triggering your anxiety...wrong course...wrong uni...wrong time to leave home?
Don't worry about the age thing, I did a year at college so went at 19yrs old and the year was negligible. I did my first two years then took a break before going back at age 23 to finish my final two years (honours degrees being 4 yrs total in Scotland) and that was a wee bit different age-wise but you still find people to click with. So don't let that make you feel different....lots of people have gap years, or decide their first year was not right for them, you often can still get funding to complete your course.
I'm looking at the grand old age of 43 to be starting a PG course, and everyone else will be approx half my age but I'll swallow the discomfort as I'm passionate about my course.
Your parents need some commitment from you that you will go back, and applying now for next year will show that. Have a plan and realistic goals for your year out (not just "I'll get a job" - job market not great, so show what job area you're looking at & applying to) will appease the parents and show you're not just taking the easiest route...parents worry about you, it's their job and they want the best for you and them. Don't make them have sleepless nights worrying about you and your future....they will support you, but be decisive and forward planning with achievable goals and they can rest easier. Good luck! Gx
Reply 38
You have broad shoulders, you can deal with people being pissed at you. Better folk are short term pissed off than years of YOU being miserable. This is not you running away necessarily, often harder to show backbone and do what you feel is right for you, than do what people think you should be doing. The path of least resistance is not always the one to follow. If you really hate it now (and you have done a few weeks) then you're likely to change by this time next year when you're into the 2nd year.
Anxiety is a difficult beastie to tame and often gives you a false reading - it rears up even when you're doing the "right" thing. Talking though problems/anxieties/concerns with someone qualified is always helpful, and there's nothing these folk at uni haven't seen or heard. They can be useful to you and put you in a strong mind frame to make the decisions and plans best for you. Don't give up...if you decide to advise the uni you want to defer for the year, it will at least give you breathing space and stop the pressure you feel right now. Time then to look after you and get you in a better headspace...and job experience and travel no bad thing...just don't waste the year. Do something for you...and remember you're young enough to make mistakes and life doesn't end! Your next adventure awaits you....uni still there next year! Go meet people, have fun and work out your next step. Your parents want you happy more than anything. Gx
Brilliant news!

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