The Student Room Group

slightly paranoid I may be getting done for sexual harrassment

OK, this is a random topic but is something Im worried about.

a couple of weeks ago, I was working in a pharmacy on random days and more or less every day that week, there was some sort of condom-related issues (1 was about a broken condom - which I always find a funny topic as everyone says its de to big dicks (WRONG); the other 2 were regarding people getting malaria tablets (including a man in his 50s who had no idea how to use a condom - seriously?). anyways, I was telling my colleagues about these things (as people do if it is a funny topic) and about how condoms are designed to fit anything (including heads and water melons) and that if a condom is small, the guy will be in a lot of pain (described it like how 1 of the people told me ie like getting your thing slammed ina door) and that people are better getting condoms online if theyre concerned about size as XL arent that much bigger.

It seems however that these conversations were taken a bit too harshly and got a phonecall half an hour ago saying that 2-3 of these colleagues filed complaints about "something to do with condoms". I explained to the manager exactly what was said and what happened and he told me I just need to apologize to the colleagues (1 middle aged, the other was a freshie in late teens) as they definately took it out of context / thought I was being pervy.

thing is however, I am bloody paranoid that I have done something wrong and am worried about getting done for sexual harassment (last thing I need as a recent-ish qualified pharmacist in my mid 20s).

so people, should I be worried or not really and just not mention about condoms /avoid people wanting malaria tablets?
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
OK, this is a random topic but is something Im worried about.

a couple of weeks ago, I was working in a pharmacy on random days and more or less every day that week, there was some sort of condom-related issues (1 was about a broken condom - which I always find a funny topic as everyone says its de to big dicks (WRONG); the other 2 were regarding people getting malaria tablets (including a man in his 50s who had no idea how to use a condom - seriously?). anyways, I was telling my colleagues about these things (as people do if it is a funny topic) and about how condoms are designed to fit anything (including heads and water melons) and that if a condom is small, the guy will be in a lot of pain (described it like how 1 of the people told me ie like getting your thing slammed ina door) and that people are better getting condoms online if theyre concerned about size as XL arent that much bigger.

It seems however that these conversations were taken a bit too harshly and got a phonecall half an hour ago saying that 2-3 of these colleagues filed complaints about "something to do with condoms". I explained to the manager exactly what was said and what happened and he told me I just need to apologize to the colleagues (1 middle aged, the other was a freshie in late teens) as they definately took it out of context / thought I was being pervy.

thing is however, I am bloody paranoid that I have done something wrong and am worried about getting done for sexual harassment (last thing I need as a recent-ish qualified pharmacist in my mid 20s).

so people, should I be worried or not really and just not mention about condoms /avoid people wanting malaria tablets?


I should mention Ima male and both colleagues were female. It was silly in my part for talking about this to them but I have literally noone to talk to during the work day and sadly pharmacies arent renowned for male staff. whats weird however is that my pre-reg venue, which is staffed by conservative people who arent family or family friends, used to have these talks more or less all the time and they were predominantly female staff
It IS a touchy issue im afraid. To me, it doesnt seem like you intended to offend people and were just talking about things in general but do not mention this to ladies as they will think your a perv (also people from abroad will find it offensive). as someone who is also a pharmacist, i know how it feels being stuck inside a place with noone to chat to but it is sadly 1 of the "perks" of the job.
(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 3
Hi mods, could yo please change the title to "NEED URGENT ADVICE:" also please weigh in on the topic as I am worried and losing a lot of sleep over it
You've mentioned that you've already explained to the manager.
Have you sincerely apologised to the collegues? If so, then let it be and although it sucks in the future just avoid these sorts of topics.
No need to loose sleep over what's already done as you can't change that.
Reply 5
i havent had the opportunity to apologise (yet) but I seriously cant stand working there anyways. the colleagues as it is I cant stand anyways (the middle aged one is a lazy cow who, if you tell her to do a degree of multitasking, will look like you asked her to punch someone). at the same time, the teenage colleague is a tad, slow. a good example is the day of the man in his 50's, I had to do 2 malaria consultations and 3 flu jabs in an hour. I told the colleague to knock on the door if she wanted me to check anything. but instead she let an hour's worth of prescriptions build up and didnt have the courtesy to apologise to patients. I apologised repeatedly but people get quite annoyed when they have to wait 1 and a bit hours for a 5-10 minute job. on top of that, I am always having to clean someone else's mess and I get given flack for trying to help people / prevent them from screwing themselves over.
Reply 6
but just to clarify, do you think what i did constitutes as sexal harassment or just crudely executed words (the fact the manager's response indicated he knew I had no ill intent but it is annoying how I seem to annoy people wherever I go due to complaining about staff members being on their phones all the time; staff being utterly incompetent; trying to make old fashioned people do things in a modern/efficient way; refusing to compromise my patient-oriented approach if it means selling random crap /harming patients)
Original post by Anonymous
i havent had the opportunity to apologise (yet) but I seriously cant stand working there anyways. the colleagues as it is I cant stand anyways (the middle aged one is a lazy cow who, if you tell her to do a degree of multitasking, will look like you asked her to punch someone). at the same time, the teenage colleague is a tad, slow. a good example is the day of the man in his 50's, I had to do 2 malaria consultations and 3 flu jabs in an hour. I told the colleague to knock on the door if she wanted me to check anything. but instead she let an hour's worth of prescriptions build up and didnt have the courtesy to apologise to patients. I apologised repeatedly but people get quite annoyed when they have to wait 1 and a bit hours for a 5-10 minute job. on top of that, I am always having to clean someone else's mess and I get given flack for trying to help people / prevent them from screwing themselves over.


Okay that seriously sounds wack. Have you talked to any of your superiors about this? Someone who has the authority to do something about it? It is unfair that you have to deal with such a workload, the others should be pulling their own weight.
Having to wait an hour?! I'm surprised this hasn't been given an official complaint by customers.
Reply 8
i know right? I have talked to superiors abot this but generally I end up getting vilified. truth is,

i didnt choose to go into community pharmacy. I originally wanted to be a GP but due to experiencing PTSD-induced panic attack during A2 levels, I ended up doing pharmacy.


whilst I did well for the circumstances (got a 2:1/merit at 21 years of age despite missing most of my last year due to personal health / fianancial reasons) and had interviews at tonnes of top hospitals (my goal at uni was that if i couldnt be a doctor, then I should aim to be a hospital pharmacist as they have tonnes of clinical stuff with no retail b****** and minimal dispensing (+the opportunity to specialise in certain areas and be an independent prescriber)), I unfortunately fluffed tonnes of interviews due to a variety of reasons (half of which werent my fault) and ended up working in a community pharmacy where my 1st boss (ot superintendent but manager) tried getting me sacked with tonnes of dirty, in some cases illegal, crap. thankfully they left after 4 months but due to a variety of reasons, for the last 8 months of my registration training, there was only me, the new manager (who had only been working in the UK for <3 years and who had no experience with training people) and a trainee counter-staff member.

ultimately I passed but that experience, combined with my experience working in a hospital for a month, made me want to go for a more clinical role. unfortunately however, to work in hospital these days, you need a minimum of 6-12 months working in a hospital, and to work as a GP-based pharmacist (ie doing what GPs do at half the wages), you need 2 years experience with a clinical qualification. in the end I just ended up working in retail and have only had 55 days work since last year june.
Reply 9
sorry for info overload, am in a venting mood.
Original post by Anonymous
sorry for info overload, am in a venting mood.


Hey no problem. I will come back to this tomorrow and see if I can help you somehow. Tired so brain not working properly.
Besides if nothing, it is good to let things out.
Reply 11
I don't think offending prudes is sexual harassment

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by RobML
I don't think offending prudes is sexual harassment

Posted from TSR Mobile


sadly enough, i have been really worried by this scenario. i did some reading and it seems that the knob in the door comment is allegedly considered a form of sexualharassment.
Okay. This does suck really. I don't know what you can do besides apologise.
You could look for other jobs etc on the side?
Wherever you are working currently sounds like a soul sucker... even if you find another pharmacy (if not what you actually want) might be better.
because Im a locum, I go all over the place but truth is that its a similar scenario iregardless of where I go regarding community pharmacy being shite.

On the plus side, I spoke to my professional union and they said b the looks of it, there is no ftp, harassment or profesional reports against me (fingers crossed its permanently that way) and that I should try apologizing in the presence of a manager in case they say i did nothing.
I have sent a text to the manager first thing this morning to find out when I should go in whilst either manager is present.
BTW, here the response from a solicitor who my union got in touch with:

"

Thank you for your emails responding to my earlier email and giving more background to your enquiry.



I have discussed your enquiry with one of our pharmacist advisors. He confirms that you may leave yourself vulnerable by having discussions of the nature stated in your enquiry and emails, as not all staff may appreciate your reasons for discussing these issues, which you state is that you always try sharing information about counter consultations/medication wherever possible as people need to learn about these and other topics whilst working in a pharmacy.



At present, the manager appears not to have regarded the issues as being so serious as to be a potential FTP issue, GPhC or sexual harassment issue. I asked that you provide full details of the complaint. The information you have provided does not appear to have raised any issues of sexual harassment. The manager seems only to have asked you to apologise. It is assumed from that, that he has not prevented you from doing further locum work at the pharmacy.



As far as the issue of apologising is concerned, our pharmacy advisor suggests that you simply inform the assistants that you did not mean any offence by raising the discussion and apologise if any offence was caused. It is suggested this be done with the manager present. It would also be sensible not to talk about condoms again, as suggested by the manager.



I trust the above information is helpful. Should you have any further questions please do not hesitate to contact me."
Original post by Anonymous
because Im a locum, I go all over the place but truth is that its a similar scenario iregardless of where I go regarding community pharmacy being shite.

On the plus side, I spoke to my professional union and they said b the looks of it, there is no ftp, harassment or profesional reports against me (fingers crossed its permanently that way) and that I should try apologizing in the presence of a manager in case they say i did nothing.
I have sent a text to the manager first thing this morning to find out when I should go in whilst either manager is present.


Fingers crossed.

Original post by Anonymous
BTW, here the response from a solicitor who my union got in touch with:

"

Thank you for your emails responding to my earlier email and giving more background to your enquiry.



I have discussed your enquiry with one of our pharmacist advisors. He confirms that you may leave yourself vulnerable by having discussions of the nature stated in your enquiry and emails, as not all staff may appreciate your reasons for discussing these issues, which you state is that you always try sharing information about counter consultations/medication wherever possible as people need to learn about these and other topics whilst working in a pharmacy.



At present, the manager appears not to have regarded the issues as being so serious as to be a potential FTP issue, GPhC or sexual harassment issue. I asked that you provide full details of the complaint. The information you have provided does not appear to have raised any issues of sexual harassment. The manager seems only to have asked you to apologise. It is assumed from that, that he has not prevented you from doing further locum work at the pharmacy.



As far as the issue of apologising is concerned, our pharmacy advisor suggests that you simply inform the assistants that you did not mean any offence by raising the discussion and apologise if any offence was caused. It is suggested this be done with the manager present. It would also be sensible not to talk about condoms again, as suggested by the manager.



I trust the above information is helpful. Should you have any further questions please do not hesitate to contact me."


That is good news. Thank you for the update!
Original post by RobML
I don't think offending prudes is sexual harassment

Posted from TSR Mobile


your advice is void lol you're a creep
Original post by Anonymous
your advice is void lol you're a creep


That is seriously a rude thing to say. Your comment here is void.

And nah lol he's not a creep but you are.
Hugh Mungus what?

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