Hi! I'm a guy, I've had 2 girlfriends in the past. I'm bi, but have never come out due to fear. I know it's 2016, but my Mum was brought up in either the era or an area where she'll go on about gay people. Like if she turns the TV on, she'll say something like "why is there so many (gays) on TV nowadays?". It's not needed, I tell her off, but I worry if I ever told her I was bi.
Basically, me and my best friend from college, a guy, were talking in a pub once and he basically came out with he had feelings for me. I've always been self-conscious of my body and just a few days before he said that, there was a picture of me on holiday on Facebook with my shirt off (I was tagged in it). He said how nice I looked.
I was a bit in shock, but the evening was fine. We got talking by text - I was asking him if it was just a kinda tipsy/drunk thing he was saying, but it wasn't. I told him I was bisexual - the first person I've ever told.
He asked if I'd ever kissed a guy - I hadn't. After chatting for about 9 hours, after college, we arranged to meet up at mine. He kissed me, and I kissed him back.
I really really liked it. For the past few months, we've been meeting up, just for a usual laugh/chat but have been kissing too. Over those months, I've just become really attracted to him. It's weird because I've always considered him as a best mate, nothing else.
Thing is, I just love it. I love him, and want to carry on doing it. Someone (a friend who is gay) warned me that some guys do that just to "pleasure" themselves. Do you think we're both just doing that? I did say to him, if I could be, I'd want to be with him. He agreed...
What do you think about all this? Shall I stop and just be mates again or...?
Thanks!