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Boyfriend liked another girl's picture

He 'recently added' a woman on Facebook who is single and has two young children, and liked a selfie of her, and picture of her toddler. Should I be annoyed, or maybe he just met her at the tourist attraction he works at? We've only been together a few weeks, and he acts so possessive over me already and is always telling me how much he loves me and misses me so I don't know :s-smilie:

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Reply 1
Avatar for Reue
Reue
20
Maybe they're old friends?
Reply 2
Avatar for UWS
UWS
21
I think you are over thinking this way too much. Liking pictures means nothing, as the above poster said, they could have been friends from before and reconnected. Also, how does him telling you he loves you and misses you equate to being "possessive"?
Reply 3
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by UWS
I think you are over thinking this way too much. Liking pictures means nothing, as the above poster said, they could have been friends from before and reconnected. Also, how does him telling you he loves you and misses you equate to being "possessive"?


By possessive, I meant he doesn't like it when I have friends of the opposite gender and he doesn't even like me speaking to them, then there he is openly liking another woman's picture, it's hypocritical. I hope I am overthinking, I just don't want him to hurt me. :/
Reply 4
Avatar for UWS
UWS
21
Original post by Anonymous
By possessive, I meant he doesn't like it when I have friends of the opposite gender and he doesn't even like me speaking to them, then there he is openly liking another woman's picture, it's hypocritical. I hope I am overthinking, I just don't want him to hurt me. :/


It sounds like you feel the same about him then. You both need to find your comfort zone or it'll just go downhill. No need to overthink things like this
Original post by Anonymous
By possessive, I meant he doesn't like it when I have friends of the opposite gender and he doesn't even like me speaking to them, then there he is openly liking another woman's picture, it's hypocritical. I hope I am overthinking, I just don't want him to hurt me. :/


I don't want to get in your business but he sounds emotionally manipulative and he also sounds like he doesn't respect your freedom and your own choices. I certainly wouldn't want to be with someone who tells me who I can and can't speak to or be friends with.
Reply 6
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by Reue
Maybe they're old friends?


Possibly, but he's a 20 year old student at university and she looks about 30 and has two children, so they're probably not even in the same social circle. He meets a lot of tourists from different countries where he works though, but still he obviously went and asked for her Facebook to add her on. If I did that, he would've gone ballistic.
Reply 7
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Anonymous #1
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Original post by illuminalien
I don't want to get in your business but he sounds emotionally manipulative and he also sounds like he doesn't respect your freedom and your own choices. I certainly wouldn't want to be with someone who tells me who I can and can't speak to or be friends with.


I've only been with him for a few weeks too and we're long distance, I can't imagine how possessive he would get if we lived together :s-smilie: whenever I say I'm going out, the first thing he'll ask without fail is whether they're male or female. I said to him 'would you not like it if my friend is a male?' He replied with 'no of course not, I'd get angry because I love you and I don't want you meeting men', make what you want of that.
Reply 8
Avatar for Hayytch
Hayytch
9
Original post by Anonymous
He 'recently added' a woman on Facebook who is single and has two young children, and liked a selfie of her, and picture of her toddler. Should I be annoyed, or maybe he just met her at the tourist attraction he works at? We've only been together a few weeks, and he acts so possessive over me already and is always telling me how much he loves me and misses me so I don't know :s-smilie:


You're overreacting.
Original post by Anonymous
I've only been with him for a few weeks too and we're long distance, I can't imagine how possessive he would get if we lived together :s-smilie: whenever I say I'm going out, the first thing he'll ask without fail is whether they're male or female. I said to him 'would you not like it if my friend is a male?' He replied with 'no of course not, I'd get angry because I love you and I don't want you meeting men', make what you want of that.


Hmm, obviously it's your life and you can make decisions as you wish, but (as a psychology major) that controlling who you can and can't associate with is often the first step in an abusive relationship. Personally I would get out of the relationship and find someone who respects you enough to be friends with who you wish, but I don't know the details of your relationship obviously so feel free to ignore me!
Original post by UWS
It sounds like you feel the same about him then. You both need to find your comfort zone or it'll just go downhill. No need to overthink things like this


Yeah I mean he doesn't like me meeting up or speaking with the opposite sex, so I don't want him liking any girl's pictures, or meeting up with them either, it works both ways. It just annoys me that he has the nerve to stop me going out with males, but there he is openly liking her pictures, and maybe even talking to her privately on there.
Original post by Hayytch
You're overreacting.


I hope so
why are you jealous, he is your boyfriend. just because he like someone else's pic, it doesn't mean that they are together.
Original post by Anonymous
I hope so


Someone telling you who you can't and can be friends with? Hmmm. strange. Friends are friends. Friends are necessary. Lovers will have arguments from time to time, and that's when friends can help comfort you.

And openly liking other people's photos and stuff? Why don't you give him a taste of his own medicine? And him hurt you? In what way? Break your heart kind of way, or mental or physical perhaps (he's a university student so probably not physical) but still raises concerns, unless you mean something else.

Something tells me you're an introverted person and please clarify.

You should consider becoming more assertive. Seriously, check up stuff like 'having assertiveness without sounding rude' on google. Because he is being assertive and rude at the same time. Okay, if he didn't want you getting too chummy with guys, I can understand that, and same with you if you didn't want him getting too chummy with other girls, however, something doesn't sound right in his approach.
yeah, he's definitely going to leave you for her
Don'r worry about it, he's only liking a picture. You do that for friends don't you? heck, I even do that for people I don't like on facebook. It's just a trend to like stuff nowadays, doesn't even mean much.

Can you elaborate on how he's being possessive?
What the **** is wrong with society these days man, its a flippin picture not a wedding proposal man relax. It's not that deep fam
Original post by Kiritsugu
Someone telling you who you can't and can be friends with? Hmmm. strange. Friends are friends. Friends are necessary. Lovers will have arguments from time to time, and that's when friends can help comfort you.

And openly liking other people's photos and stuff? Why don't you give him a taste of his own medicine? And him hurt you? In what way? Break your heart kind of way, or mental or physical perhaps (he's a university student so probably not physical) but still raises concerns, unless you mean something else.

Something tells me you're an introverted person and please clarify.

You should consider becoming more assertive. Seriously, check up stuff like 'having assertiveness without sounding rude' on google. Because he is being assertive and rude at the same time. Okay, if he didn't want you getting too chummy with guys, I can understand that, and same with you if you didn't want him getting too chummy with other girls, however, something doesn't sound right in his approach.


thank you for your response. I did speak to him about the not being friends with males, he told me something along the lines of because he loves me so he doesn't want me meeting other men, he doesn't want 'other men looking at my woman', I said to him that I can have innocent friends with no ulterior motives, but he said I don't know what goes on in the minds of some men.

I decided to play him a bit at his own game when he said he was with a friend, as in I asked straight away 'male or female?', he said 'male' and I said yes that's fine and he told me to not worry. I couldn't care less if he was meeting up with a man or a woman in reality, I'm not possessive at all, I just thought I'd let him feel how I feel when he says it to me. Also, when I say I don't want him to hurt me, I mean I don't want him to be flirting with other women on Facebook whilst he is still with me, telling me I'm the woman he loves, I don't want to be cheated on.
Social media is probably the number one reason why relationships end because people overthink nonsense like this! #Moooose
Original post by Pewtersky
Don'r worry about it, he's only liking a picture. You do that for friends don't you? heck, I even do that for people I don't like on facebook. It's just a trend to like stuff nowadays, doesn't even mean much.

Can you elaborate on how he's being possessive?


By possessive, I mean whenever I mention I'm out with a friend, he will immediately ask without fail if my friend is male or female, it's usually female so he's happy. If I say what would you do if I was meeting with a man? He says he'd be angry if I met with a man, that he loves me and does not want me to meet other men. I told him that my friends don't have feelings for me, he responded with 'I don't like other men looking at my woman', and that I don't know what some men are thinking :s-smilie:

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