PGCE - Current Students Thread

I teach my first full lesson (well, of the PGCE) on Tuesday, which I'm really looking forward to, then pick up all my year 7 classes next week. The only thing that's bothering me slightly is how much work purely for the uni I have to do. I don't begrudge the incredibly detailed lesson plans, as frankly I fully accept that I've a long way to go before I'm at my mentor's 'write a few notes on a post it note and call it a lesson plan' level (let alone the HoD's 'wing it and see what happens' approach).

There just seems to be a continuing drip of extra things to do from the uni in terms of what needs doing for assignments or even pre-lecture tasks. I've spent the last nine years working in a job that required a lot of paperwork, I'm good at paperwork, but I suspect this year the uni work is going to drive me closer to insanity than the teaching ever will.

How's everyone else doing so far?

I teach my first full lesson (well, of the PGCE) on Tuesday, which I'm really looking forward to, then pick up all my year 7 classes next week. The only thing that's bothering me slightly is how much work purely for the uni I have to do. I don't begrudge the incredibly detailed lesson plans, as frankly I fully accept that I've a long way to go before I'm at my mentor's 'write a few notes on a post it note and call it a lesson plan' level (let alone the HoD's 'wing it and see what happens' approach).

There just seems to be a continuing drip of extra things to do from the uni in terms of what needs doing for assignments or even pre-lecture tasks. I've spent the last nine years working in a job that required a lot of paperwork, I'm good at paperwork, but I suspect this year the uni work is going to drive me closer to insanity than the teaching ever will.

How's everyone else doing so far?

In teaching there will always be something else to do. The skill is in seeing what is most important. At this stage, lesson planning and delivery is most important, then marking, then university tasks. The most important this is to be a good teacher, everything else is secondary.

As tory888 says, there is plenty of stuff to do once you qualify! I've survived a month as an NQT, during which I've been handed more bits of paper that possibly relate to my class than I can recall! Many of them have been put in my cupboard with the intention of dealing with them. But I'm never in a position to sort out the cupboard or the papers because I have that many other things to do.

You learn to prioritise. Always plan your lessons and put your best effort into delivering and then marking them.

First uni observation on Tuesday. With one of my worst classes, naturally.

I'm also a few months in to the PGCE, the workload isn't ridiculous, what you are all describing is pretty normal for a lot of jobs. I started my PGCE after 7 years in industry where it was fairly normal to start at 8 and not get home until 8 or 9pm.

I have to say I am having problems though and I'm seriously now considering whether teaching is for me in the long term. I am working these hours - which are nothing different from what I'm used to and I went in with full expectations of working long hours, but I'm just feeling really demoralised. Everyone else on my course keep talking about what a great time they are having in school, whereas I'm just not. There's nothing wrong with the school/mentor/kids/workload... I'm actually really finding it hard to put my finger on it and seriously wondering if I have depression as I have cried every single day for the last week, I'm just feeling like I'm not good enough to be a teacher or that's it's not for me. I'm almost also feeling like I'm bored, even though I have so much to do, and so much to improve on and I'm still only a 4a. My previous job was incredibly flexible and teaching really isn't and also knowing that my first year in teaching will be a massive pay cut from what I previously earnt, both of which I think has contributed to the stress of it all, on top of the fact that I'm constantly ill. I'm also starting to realise that teachers are really treated badly. In my previous work if you produced a good piece of work or did someone a favour, you would get a thanks or some sort of praise, whereas here I'm not really seeing it, I kinda of feel like teachers are just like cogs in some kind of school factory - go in, work all the hours with out a minute to yourself - go home.

I don't really want to quit my PGCE and I really want to stick it out as I'm not a quitter. I think even just in the last few weeks I have improved so many qualities which will be useful later. However, I don't think a proper teaching job is for me and unless I really love my next placement, I'll be either considering supply work or looking into graduate schemes in a new sector.

Anyways - I know this is a bit of a pessimistic post, but I just needed to tell someone and I really don't want to bring the morale of my friends down.

I'm also a few months in to the PGCE, the workload isn't ridiculous, what you are all describing is pretty normal for a lot of jobs. I started my PGCE after 7 years in industry where it was fairly normal to start at 8 and not get home until 8 or 9pm.

I have to say I am having problems though and I'm seriously now considering whether teaching is for me in the long term. I am working these hours - which are nothing different from what I'm used to and I went in with full expectations of working long hours, but I'm just feeling really demoralised. Everyone else on my course keep talking about what a great time they are having in school, whereas I'm just not. There's nothing wrong with the school/mentor/kids/workload... I'm actually really finding it hard to put my finger on it and seriously wondering if I have depression as I have cried every single day for the last week, I'm just feeling like I'm not good enough to be a teacher or that's it's not for me. I'm almost also feeling like I'm bored, even though I have so much to do, and so much to improve on and I'm still only a 4a. My previous job was incredibly flexible and teaching really isn't and also knowing that my first year in teaching will be a massive pay cut from what I previously earnt, both of which I think has contributed to the stress of it all, on top of the fact that I'm constantly ill. I'm also starting to realise that teachers are really treated badly. In my previous work if you produced a good piece of work or did someone a favour, you would get a thanks or some sort of praise, whereas here I'm not really seeing it, I kinda of feel like teachers are just like cogs in some kind of school factory - go in, work all the hours with out a minute to yourself - go home.

I don't really want to quit my PGCE and I really want to stick it out as I'm not a quitter. I think even just in the last few weeks I have improved so many qualities which will be useful later. However, I don't think a proper teaching job is for me and unless I really love my next placement, I'll be either considering supply work or looking into graduate schemes in a new sector.

Anyways - I know this is a bit of a pessimistic post, but I just needed to tell someone and I really don't want to bring the morale of my friends down.

This is a tough time of year for everyone in teaching, and it is OK to be feeling the way you do!!

As an NQT in a primary setting, I have been feeling similar myself - like I'm not doing enough for the kids, in spite of the 60 hour weeks I am consistently putting in. The fact that I am the first one there most mornings and the last one there, aside from the headteacher and the caretaker, still didn't feel like I'm doing a good enough job. Fortunately, when I discussed this with my mentor, she showed me some data and looked at some of the books with me, reassuring me that I was doing OK.

However, I am very lucky to have someone who takes the time to listen to me and help me. Without the other teachers at my school, I would be feeling much, much worse than I have been. We're a small school and so there aren't many of us, but we have really good relationships and know exactly who to go to for which support. I think this is a really key part of teaching - making sure that you have a good support network both at school and at home. Having friends who know how I'm feeling because they have felt it themselves makes my life so much better when I can have a rant Similarly, the right team of teachers in a school means that your work is appreciated - I actually cannot count the times in even just 7 or 8 weeks that someone from the SLT has told me that I'm doing really well, or complimented some aspect of my teaching practise. Yes, some teachers are treated badly - but not all!

In terms of feeling bored... can't say I've felt that since I started teaching! Except for one day so far, when we had to do maths all day... that day, it was confirmed to me that I am cut out more for Primary than Secondary, because I get to teach so many different subjects instead of just one or two all day long! Is it possible that the boredom is linked to just having one subject?

Alternatively, it is important to make sure that you can have fun in your lessons, and if you have fun then your students are likely to respond positively to it, which will show in your teaching, progress, assessment etc. etc. Maybe something for you to focus on would be planning lessons that are fun for you? That might help with so many of the negative feelings you are having

Keep going - even if teaching isn't for you in the end, there are so many positives that you could take away from the PGCE year if you stick at it.

Although it doesn't seem like there's anything wrong with your current placement, it could be that it's just not suited to you as a teacher. The school that you're in can make a huge difference to how you feel about teaching, so if you feel comfortable doing this I'd definitely advise trying out the second placement too.

I absolutely know what you mean about the thanks/recognition for your work. Sadly, in most of the education sector (from what I've seen), it's taken as a given that you will give above and beyond and always put work first, do extra, and almost never does anyone say 'It was really good that you stepped up and did that'. It's just expected, and if you don't do it you fall behind and get in trouble. Not that everyone in charge doesn't recognise the good work, it's just that it's done so much that it doesn't 'stand out' and people have no time or resources to really recognise it. If you do something really well, usually it will result in being asked to do more because you're good at it (without an increase in pay, new title, more time to do it etc). I didn't notice it so much when teaching but having moved on to another job where my boss will say to me directly 'Thank you for doing that. We think it's really great that you did this, keep it up.' and maybe I'll get a pay rise. I know that extra effort I put in is appreciated, rather than simply required.

You might like to find someone to talk to in person about how you're feeling... it could help you work your feelings out and, if you're concerned about possible depression it could help re-assure you or let you get help. I certainly felt very down at times when training, but not in the same way as I would have with depression (at least, as I understand it, not having suffered with it personally). You could speak to your GP, confide in a friend, family member or tutor (the tutors will have seen these sorts of feelings before and can probably re-assure you) or you could call a helpline such as the Education Support Partnership https://www.educationsupportpartnership.org.uk/ (contains what used to be the Teacher Support Network, providing support and a listening ear for teachers feeling like they need someone to talk to).

Thanks for this. I've just spent another day crying. I don't know what is wrong with me - I've now cried everyday for two weeks and more and more everyday. The minute I think of school I cry but i enjoy being in front of the class, and I enjoy leanring all about education, I think I just hate planning especially Powerpoint.. I'm going to try and see a councillor at uni when I'm next in as I've never felt this low, I went through a bad phase before starting and avoided seeing a doctor because of the whole fitness to teach thing (I've suffered from anxiety and depression in the past - but this feels a lot more intense) so I'm wondering if this actually is actually is depression that I've just bottled up too long since I have no motivation to do anything other than school or sleep.

Thanks - I am going to make an appt with a councillor at uni and potentially with my doctor. I mentioned in another post jst above that I have suffered from anxiety and depression before - but this time it's a lot more intense. It's like it's paralysing, just going onto a computer to plan or stepping foot in school feels like so much effort. Today is my birthday and I literally wanted to do nothing. I'm wondering as before starting the course I had felt a bit down for some time but avoided the doctor because of the whole fitness to teach thing.
Basically I suffer from a pituary tumour and stopped medication (dopamine agonists) at my docs reccomendation this time last year and went through pretty bad withdrawal which left me feeling really low and unwilling to do anything, I got better after a few weeks but not 100% and I'm wondering if maybe I just need the extra dopamine... When I took medication I did actually feel awesome, at least I have y regular appt with my consultant for that next week, maybe I just need to start those again.

As someone who went through years of social anxiety and borderline depression, I do know how it feels. The intensity of it is likely to be enhanced by the fact that you have quite a lot to do, and not very much experience - the desire to get it right means that your anxiety is greater due to the worry that you won't get it right, even though you know that it is unreasonable for you to be perfect because you are just starting out! At least, this is very much how I felt, and to an extent how I feel now.

For me, the bonus is my work environment. As much as I work through lunches and keep to myself most of the time because I want to get all my work done (taking on Year 6 for an NQT year might not have been the smartest decision I ever made ), it's always lovely to be in the staff room on the odd occasion, or go to the staff meeting every week and have a bit of a chat. And my weekly meeting with my mentor is always good, because she's so supportive of my practice and how I manage things.

It strikes me that you need to find that support somewhere, and if it isn't in teaching then it will be somewhere else. But I think you are very sensible to be seeing a councillor, and if you have had medical issues that cause such effects as you mentioned before, then it's an avenue you should explore. It would be regrettable to miss out on something that you actually enjoy, simply because the opportunity for help was missed!

If you are enjoying being at the front of the class, but not so much the planning of it... have you asked for help from your tutor/mentor. It is very early in the day for you as a teacher, and they shouldn't begrudge giving you that extra bit of help with planning, especially if you are finding it hard and are trying desperately to do a good job!

Yeh I've had a chat with my both my mentors and my tutor, again it's really hard for me to pinpoint exactly what is making me miserable - hence why I'm wondering if it's my medical issues or depression. I've been told I have potential, that I'm on the right track and I've been told my planning is absolutely fine - I just don't enjoy doing it, basically I just wish I could just have lessons ready and just stand in front of the class and not deal with anything else....

I dunno, let's see how it all goes... less than 5 weeks to go then I have a new placement, and I may *hopefully* start to feel better by then. Whatever it takes I really want to make it until the end of the course- at least that way I will have it under my belt and it gives me 6 more months and experience in a different school to make a final decision on whether this is definitely for me.