"Dear you...." MKII

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Dear you,

I love you. More than anyone and anything. It's been over two years since I lost you and as I write this, I'm crying myself to sleep because I wish you were here, to take the pain away and be there for me. I get these bouts of sadness over your death, especially at Christmas time and somehow I still end up crying like the day I found out you left me. I never told you how much you meant to me, how much I adored and treasured you.

And I'm sorry for being a terrible best friend, for distancing myself towards the end but I couldn't deal with the pain, and often I feel like it's my fault you are no longer with me or your loved ones. But I must think, you are no longer suffering now.

Yet I can't help but feel pain over people who still have their best friend and do the things we did. Whenever I hear Yellow by Coldplay, I think of the day of your funeral where I wore yellow for you and how much the lyrics related to me.

I love you, so much and I just wish you were with me, by my side. But I have to face this alone, and make you proud because it's a stressful time for me and all I want is for me to make you happy at what I've achieved.

There isn't a moment I don't think about you, and how much I re read our messages and listen to our voice notes but you're at peace now and that's all I've ever wanted.

Sleep tight beautiful, and save me a spot up there please. :cry2:

From me.

Reply 1801

Andy98

Original post by Rhythmical

From me.

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Reply 1802

username1726117

Dear You:

You ruined my life. I hope you're happy with yourself.

From Me.

Spoiler

Original post by starfab

Everyone is free to post. Don't be put off. This is your outlet too, just like it is for all of us. :hugs:

Original post by Matrix123

Listen to starfab Aysha, don't worry about what other people are saying.
Please do continue posting because it will help you in the long run :yep:

You're free to post whatever you want :hugs:

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Original post by Andy98

Hey, I know we don't talk much but I hope you're OK. And if you're not, my inbox is always open. I may not be the best at understanding other cultures due to my upbringing; but I'm a good listener if you need someone to talk to. :jumphug:

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Thanks everyone

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Reply 1805

Matrix123

Original post by mediaya

Thanks everyone

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Any time Aysha :hugs:

Reply 1806

username1942323

Original post by Matrix123

Any time Aysha :hugs:

Erm sorry for nor replying to ur pm

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Reply 1807

Matrix123

Original post by mediaya

Erm sorry for nor replying to ur pm

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Aww it's OK :yep:

Reply 1808

username1942323

Original post by Matrix123

Aww it's OK :yep:

Thanks

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Reply 1809

yasmine_x

Hope you get well soon. x

Reply 1810

username1339858_

Original post by mediaya

Thanks everyone

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More than welcome

Reply 1811

Anonymous #169

Dear You,

I wish you'd stop falling into this depression. She wouldn't have wanted this for you. She didn't die for this.
I wish you'd give your arms a rest; she saved your skin not to have it cut away like this.
I wish you'd hurry up and figure out what you're doing with your life, you're driving me insane.
I wish you'd just take up her dreams of being a physicist and quit complaining already.
I wish you'd get smarter at Maths instead of constantly saying "I can't do this s***" before giving up, constantly.
I wish you'd lose your hubris and get some f****** help. Break your walls for once instead of worrying everyone.
I wish you'd start living again.

Thank god for the anonymous tool.

Sincerely,
An extremely aggravated You