In love with married men.

What do I do? I love a guy who is 100% perfect and I feel I belong with him, I know It's wrong to make a move but I'm trying to get over it. But I cant, he's on my mind all the time. Any comments/suggestions/advice?

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Reply 1

Nirvana1989-1994

Ffs, leave him alone. Jesus. :colonhash:

Reply 2

Wandulu

To be frank with you, you are going to have to quench your feelings for the man. If he is in a committed relationship then you should stay out of it, however that is if he is an committed relationship. how do you know that you love this man? have you kissed him while he is married? You cant be sure that you are in love with the guy if you have not been intimate with him. That's just my opinion, bearing in mind I am looking at this from a point of view where you and him have not done anything yet and he has not cheated on his wife. My advice would be to let go of the feelings that you have no matter how hard that may be, whether that means removing him from your life then that is what you have to do, it is not your place to come in and destroy a perfectly good marriage. You could even speak to him about it and see what he has to see on the matter.

Reply 3

AspireExcite

1. Put yourself in the wife's shoes.
2. Men like to compartmentalise.
3. Do you want to be the homewrecker?
4. What's yours will be yours without too much effort.

Reply 4

UWS

You answered your own question here, you know it's wrong so you don't do anything.

Reply 5

maroumarou

As well as everything that has already been said, say this man was to leave his wife and begin a relationship with you- what is to stop him from doing it again within your relationship? The sort of person willing to not merely cheat on a partner but someone they have commited to for life is unlikely to have very little trouble cheating again

Reply 6

LauraMayden1

-Firstly, your feelings are not the only ones that matter.
-Your feelings are not the be all and end all.
-Your feelings are clouding your judgement.
-You will regret acting on your feelings (unless you're a psychopath).

So get rid of your feelings by getting rid of the source of your feelings. This is usually an attachment to a fantasy or idea that you have, whether of a person or relationship etc. So rid yourself of fantasies and face reality. He's not 100% perfect; nobody is. He's a human being with flaws, and also some good points which you've desperately been looking for, and now that you've found it you don't want to let go.

But rest assured, there are many other men out there who probably also fit the bill, and you'll find him, you just need to put yourself out there and have patience. We often fall into the disillusioned trap that we'll never be able to find someone like that again, but the truth is, there are actually many others who are like that, we just don't see it.

Reply 7

username47781

Original post by synthia77

I am afraid as the others said there is nothing you can do

Reply 8

yudothis

Original post by synthia77

Stop talking to him, stop stalking his facebook, etc.

Forget about him.

Reply 9

catinsomehat

Original post by synthia77

You should totally act on it. You only get one life so you should do whatever makes you happy otherwise you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

Why should you miss out on being with this person.

Good luck.

Reply 10

cupcakes87

Original post by catinsomehat

Ergh no this is a disgusting piece of advice

Reply 11

username2885068

Original post by catinsomehat

And the award for the worst piece of advice today goes to...

Reply 12

TheMaskedLady

Original post by catinsomehat

Wtf you need to get your morals straight.

and OP do you really want to be 'the other woman'? and if you did get together do you want to be in hiding all the time?

Reply 13

FranktheYank

I had a relationship with a married woman but the marriage was strained at the time.

I wasn't in a place to enter a long term relationship with her and eventually they worked things out but I'm certain that her time with me was helpful to her in clarifying what she wanted from a man and in a relationship.

Sometimes life is more subtle than you lot allow for.

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

Go for it. Might be "the one". People are in the wrong relationships for all kinds of reasons.

Reply 15

username2885068

Original post by Anonymous

Go for it. Might be "the one". People are in the wrong relationships for all kinds of reasons.

And what if they're not "the one"? They will have ruined not only his life, but the lives of his family members, his wife. And from what the OP is saying, this isn't love. This is obsession.