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Is it still rape if..?

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Reply 60
Original post by ThatOldGuy
But it -is- very easy. Let's turn the scenario on its head:

Person B has consensual sex with person A. It turns out to be disappointing and she doesn't enjoy it and does feel let down and angry with the person she had consensual sex with.

Is that rape?

Because if it -isn't- rape, then you have a de facto case for saying that there is no after-the-fact rule with regards to rape. If someone says no, they mean no and regardless of how they feel about it afterwards, it fits the definition of rape.

However, it would be very difficult to bring charges in that case. Not least because the girl herself wouldn't press charges in all likelihood.


It makes sense, indeed. I was rather too caught up in the reaction A had afterwards and judging it more on that rather than consent which is entirely wrong after all.
Original post by EC
http://image.stirileprotv.ro/media/images/686x394/Nov2016/61849673.jpg

The study was released this summer and published in November, most of the people in my country find it is justified even if not given consent. So that clearly affected my view.


Thats the difference with members of the public. Woolly thinking and they arent likely to know what the law is anyway. No dount some wuld answer the same in the UK, but they would be wrong.

It's the law that decides whether something is rape or not. Ot requires consent or at least the reasonable belief that it has been given.
Reply 62
This is rape plain and simple, that reaction is really rare what is person A did not enjoy it?
Original post by EC
The study was released this summer and published in November, most of the people in my country find it is justified even if not given consent. So that clearly affected my view.


Rape culture means some people are prepared say that some clear cut cases of rape are justified, unshock.
Original post by EC
Finally someone figured it out. Took you a while. Clearly you know me the best....


For those wondering what I mean by rape culture, here we have the OP saying 'I raped someone' and expecting us to treat it as a joke.

(I don't think they actually did, but the way they can treat it as a joke is Not Good.)
Reply 65
Original post by RobML
What's the context of this? What situations justify what? Who was interviewed?

Posted from TSR Mobile


27.818 interviews in Europe

1007 interviews in Romania

1306 in the UK

Multiple questions to see what people think of domestic violence against women and men and their views on rape.
Reply 66
Original post by unprinted
For those wondering what I mean by rape culture, here we have the OP saying 'I raped someone' and expecting us to treat it as a joke.

(I don't think they actually did, but the way they can treat it as a joke is Not Good.)


I was being sarcastic of course because he used irony as well.
Reply 67
Original post by unprinted
Rape culture means some people are prepared say that some clear cut cases of rape are justified, unshock.


The male that dominates the woman is probably still the most popular view even today, especially in countries that don't have access to sexual education.
Reply 68
Original post by 0to100
...Don't yell.

Also, no...I get that she could have defended herself, he, whoever. But it turns out they didn't, as most people probably wouldn't get away. But I see now that you're the type who strictly puts the blame on the person: "she got violently raped. But meh she could have defended herself so who cares."



Lol, not yelling. Sorry.

I'm the type who is trying to understand both sides and get more informed on such aspects, not blaming or trying to come as I'm defending anyone.
Original post by Abdukazam
If she enjoyed it she was sufficiently aroused and lubricated not to feel a lot of pain (unless that's her thing!), which means, physiologically speaking, her body liked it, yes, she enjoyed it! It's still rape though, she just happened to like it? Kind of like how girls like it rough and all that. It's a bit messed up tbh, I think women are a bit messed up tbh


no - forcing someone to have have sex with them despite them not wanting to is messed up.
Reply 70
Original post by EC
"Person A breaks up with Person B.

Person B does not allow Person A to leave, which escalates into Person B physically restraining Person A.

Person B begins to grope and then initiates sex with Person A. Person A does fight back and tell Person B to stop. This goes on for a while.

Near the end of the act, Person A realizes they're enjoying some aspect of what is happening. Assume it's unknown to Person A exactly what they're feeling as it is happening, and feel free to conjecture on it.

At the end of the act, Person A and Person B make up and remain together.

Person A doesn't suffer through the feelings of betrayal of their trust, even though they did intend to end the relationship and did mean it when they asked Person B to stop. Even though Person B used physical coercion that Person A objected to at the moment that it happened--holding them down, pulling them by their hair, biting, face slapping--Person A looks back on the act specifically (that is to say, Person A is looking at this specific event and not just at the acts if they were to happen between two consenting adults) and feels aroused. Person A doesn't feel anger toward Person B for it." (this is a hypothetical situation taken from another site)

-> one of the replies: "Both any physical response that would suggest enjoyment and any feeling of attachment can all happen with sex itself due to over flow of hormones and oxytocin, the bonding hormone. This is how many kidnapper rapists trap their victims and confuse them. The person may not feel anger or anything towards their rapist if they had a prior relationship. That combined with the hormone overflows can cause a false sense of attachment."

Would you consider this rape? Why/why not?


It depends on whether person B has a penis.
Original post by EC
"Person A breaks up with Person B.

Person B does not allow Person A to leave, which escalates into Person B physically restraining Person A.

Person B begins to grope and then initiates sex with Person A. Person A does fight back and tell Person B to stop. This goes on for a while.

Near the end of the act, Person A realizes they're enjoying some aspect of what is happening. Assume it's unknown to Person A exactly what they're feeling as it is happening, and feel free to conjecture on it.

At the end of the act, Person A and Person B make up and remain together.

Person A doesn't suffer through the feelings of betrayal of their trust, even though they did intend to end the relationship and did mean it when they asked Person B to stop. Even though Person B used physical coercion that Person A objected to at the moment that it happened--holding them down, pulling them by their hair, biting, face slapping--Person A looks back on the act specifically (that is to say, Person A is looking at this specific event and not just at the acts if they were to happen between two consenting adults) and feels aroused. Person A doesn't feel anger toward Person B for it." (this is a hypothetical situation taken from another site)

-> one of the replies: "Both any physical response that would suggest enjoyment and any feeling of attachment can all happen with sex itself due to over flow of hormones and oxytocin, the bonding hormone. This is how many kidnapper rapists trap their victims and confuse them. The person may not feel anger or anything towards their rapist if they had a prior relationship. That combined with the hormone overflows can cause a false sense of attachment."

Would you consider this rape? Why/why not?


I would certainly say that the intent to rape was there and that for at least part of the act, it should be deemed rape.

Original post by EC
Yeah, but if person A considers atm it's not rape? Does it change anything?


Well strictly speaking the decision regarding proceeding with a rape allegation is that of the individual in question. If person B considered the dominance to have outweighed the lack of consent then as much as i may consider A to be an inferior form of life, there's no obligation on you to have the guy prosecuted.

Ultimately there are girls out there who want a master/slave relationship or want it incredibly rough (i had a girl tell me that if i could not make her cry then it was not rough enough) and if you are content to be with a man who does not believe consent is important then that is your decision as an individual.
Original post by IamJacksContempt
I mean it's technically rape yes.

Just like how everytime you have sex with your consenting but drunken partner is technically rape.

But from the passage it sounds like Person A doesn't consider it to be rape. Therefore we shouldn't either.


You do know drunken consent is valid consent right? lmao
Reply 73
Original post by EC
http://image.stirileprotv.ro/media/images/686x394/Nov2016/61849673.jpg

The study was released this summer and published in November, most of the people in my country find it is justified even if not given consent. So that clearly affected my view.


The results are strange. Why Netherlands is so different from Belgium and Slovenia from Croatia? It makes no sense. It seems that there are some loopholes in the methodology.
They have explicitly said no then it means it is rape on account of person A for sure.
Reply 75
Original post by Josb
The results are strange. Why Netherlands is so different from Belgium and Slovenia from Croatia? It makes no sense. It seems that there are some loopholes in the methodology.


http://ec.europa.eu/COMMFrontOffice/publicopinion/index.cfm/Survey/getSurveyDetail/instruments/SPECIAL/surveyKy/2115

Here it is a summary, on the official page, download it and go to page 22 and further and then to 28.
Reply 76
Original post by Josb
It depends on whether person B has a penis.


I thought about that and yes person B is a male.
Original post by StudyJosh
You do know drunken consent is valid consent right? lmao


Learn the law.
Original post by augustvv
The real question here is why would A forgive and marry this person that is quite clearly a rapist? Sounds like clear control and abuse from B's side. A needs help. I agree with a previous poster, why does OP's question even have to be asked?


While i agree that person B is a rapist i tend to disagree with the view that there is any abuse or control that is not warranted here. As much as feminists and the like may not like it, there are women that enjoy being submissive and giving their partner control. Now in cases like this i would say that it is wrong for the state to intrude on what individual A has decided was okay behaviour even if i agree person B is an ass.

Kind of like how a lot of people don't feel that sex with a drunk girl is wrong even though it technically may be. Ultimately, that is for the individuals in question to decide.
Maybe you just have a rape fetish.

I mean person A. :smile:

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