The Student Room Group

I'm gonna regret not talking to her again. [cheesy thread]

Throughout years 10 and 11 I spent a few of my lessons sitting next to a girl who i greatly enjoyed talking to (and eventually ended up developing quite a strong attraction to her).

I ended up telling her how I felt at the end of year 11, she said she felt the same way and that we should start meeting up outside of school.

However, within a few days things started to get very strange. I was talking to her on FB and she seemed very reluctant to talk about anything at all, and would simply go offline if I mentioned meeting up at all.

Being in denial, I carried on trying to talk to her on FB, our conversations got shorter and shorter. We did eventually meet up once after I'd asked a few times if she had any ideas about where we could go. However after this our conversations got incredibly short and we ended up pretty much not talking at all.

Eventually, she ended up saying that she simply said that she felt the same way about me because she wasn't sure how she felt, but wanted to give it a chance. We didn't meet up again, we had a few few-line conversations over the last couple of years on FB but nothing more.

Looking back, we did enjoy our time together mostly, but I think (she never gave me any indication whatsoever) the only problem was simply that back then I was quite a miserable guy. Looking back, even I wouldn't have wanted to hang out with myself. Aside from this, I felt as though she generally enjoyed spending time with me? I can't be certain of course, but I certainly don't think she hated doing so.

We don't go to the same school anymore, I do see her most weeks once a week at a swimming club but we haven't spoken to each other at all, we haven't had a chance even if we wanted to.

Anyway, two years on, I learnt from this rejection and have become a far more positive outgoing individual however I still end up thinking about her, I can't help but wonder if it'd work out now. The issue is, I have absolutely no idea how the hell I'd be able to get another chance.

Given that we haven't spoken properly for two years, it'd be bizzare for me to just ask to meet up with her. I know this is an awful and ridiculous idea, but I want to do so anyway. Even if it doesn't end up in a relationship, I genuinely just want to spend time with her as a friend because I really enjoyed her company, talking with her has undoubtedly been my favourite moments in my short life thus far.

If anyone has any advice on this, I'd greatly appreciate it. Although I oddly feel much better having just typed this all out.
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
Throughout years 10 and 11 I spent a few of my lessons sitting next to a girl who i greatly enjoyed talking to (and eventually ended up developing quite a strong attraction to her).

I ended up telling her how I felt at the end of year 11, she said she felt the same way and that we should start meeting up outside of school.

However, within a few days things started to get very strange. I was talking to her on FB and she seemed very reluctant to talk about anything at all, and would simply go offline if I mentioned meeting up at all.

Being in denial, I carried on trying to talk to her on FB, our conversations got shorter and shorter. We did eventually meet up once after I'd asked a few times if she had any ideas about where we could go. However after this our conversations got incredibly short and we ended up pretty much not talking at all.

Eventually, she ended up saying that she simply said that she felt the same way about me because she wasn't sure how she felt, but wanted to give it a chance. We didn't meet up again, we had a few few-line conversations over the last couple of years on FB but nothing more.

Looking back, we did enjoy our time together mostly, but I think (she never gave me any indication whatsoever) the only problem was simply that back then I was quite a miserable guy. Looking back, even I wouldn't have wanted to hang out with myself. Aside from this, I felt as though she generally enjoyed spending time with me? I can't be certain of course, but I certainly don't think she hated doing so.

We don't go to the same school anymore, I do see her most weeks once a week at a swimming club but we haven't spoken to each other at all, we haven't had a chance even if we wanted to.

Anyway, two years on, I learnt from this rejection and have become a far more positive outgoing individual however I still end up thinking about her, I can't help but wonder if it'd work out now. The issue is, I have absolutely no idea how the hell I'd be able to get another chance.

Given that we haven't spoken properly for two years, it'd be bizzare for me to just ask to meet up with her. I know this is an awful and ridiculous idea, but I want to do so anyway. Even if it doesn't end up in a relationship, I genuinely just want to spend time with her as a friend because I really enjoyed her company, talking with her has undoubtedly been my favourite moments in my short life thus far.

If anyone has any advice on this, I'd greatly appreciate it. Although I oddly feel much better having just typed this all out.


Well maybe you should have spent time together outside of school first without revealing your feelings quickly that may have pushed her away and scared her. You could try to contact her as friends but just prepare yourself that she might decline as its been 2 years and she may have moved on with her life.
Reply 2
Original post by chikane
Well maybe you should have spent time together outside of school first without revealing your feelings quickly that may have pushed her away and scared her. You could try to contact her as friends but just prepare yourself that she might decline as its been 2 years and she may have moved on with her life.


About that first part; I realise that now, I just simply had no idea what I was doing with regards to dating/love back then (I still have very little idea, but back then I truly had no idea). It's just another thing I've had to learn from.

And for the second part, yes, that's what I plan to do but i'm really not sure how, I'm not sure what I should say at all.
Original post by Anonymous
Throughout years 10 and 11 I spent a few of my lessons sitting next to a girl who i greatly enjoyed talking to (and eventually ended up developing quite a strong attraction to her).

I ended up telling her how I felt at the end of year 11, she said she felt the same way and that we should start meeting up outside of school.

However, within a few days things started to get very strange. I was talking to her on FB and she seemed very reluctant to talk about anything at all, and would simply go offline if I mentioned meeting up at all.

Being in denial, I carried on trying to talk to her on FB, our conversations got shorter and shorter. We did eventually meet up once after I'd asked a few times if she had any ideas about where we could go. However after this our conversations got incredibly short and we ended up pretty much not talking at all.

Eventually, she ended up saying that she simply said that she felt the same way about me because she wasn't sure how she felt, but wanted to give it a chance. We didn't meet up again, we had a few few-line conversations over the last couple of years on FB but nothing more.

Looking back, we did enjoy our time together mostly, but I think (she never gave me any indication whatsoever) the only problem was simply that back then I was quite a miserable guy. Looking back, even I wouldn't have wanted to hang out with myself. Aside from this, I felt as though she generally enjoyed spending time with me? I can't be certain of course, but I certainly don't think she hated doing so.

We don't go to the same school anymore, I do see her most weeks once a week at a swimming club but we haven't spoken to each other at all, we haven't had a chance even if we wanted to.

Anyway, two years on, I learnt from this rejection and have become a far more positive outgoing individual however I still end up thinking about her, I can't help but wonder if it'd work out now. The issue is, I have absolutely no idea how the hell I'd be able to get another chance.

Given that we haven't spoken properly for two years, it'd be bizzare for me to just ask to meet up with her. I know this is an awful and ridiculous idea, but I want to do so anyway. Even if it doesn't end up in a relationship, I genuinely just want to spend time with her as a friend because I really enjoyed her company, talking with her has undoubtedly been my favourite moments in my short life thus far.

If anyone has any advice on this, I'd greatly appreciate it. Although I oddly feel much better having just typed this all out.


Next time you see her at the swimming club just go up to her and say hi and have casual conversation with her and end it with "so you wanna hang out sometime?" and then try and exchange numbers and hopefully she won't be too reluctant about it since you seem to give out a more positive vibe and hopefully she notices it too.


Posted from TSR Mobile
Reply 4
Original post by Halzy1234
Next time you see her at the swimming club just go up to her and say hi and have casual conversation with her and end it with "so you wanna hang out sometime?" and then try and exchange numbers and hopefully she won't be too reluctant about it since you seem to give out a more positive vibe and hopefully she notices it too.


Posted from TSR Mobile


Hmm, problem is I don't really get a chance to; they're more lifesaving swimming lessons and we're in different groups. I will do if I get a chance of course, but it's not likely that I'll be able to anytime soon (unless I go really out of my way to do so, which isn't going to go well).
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Hmm, problem is I don't really get a chance to; they're more lifesaving swimming lessons and we're in different groups. I will do if I get a chance of course, but it's not likely that I'll be able to anytime soon (unless I go really out of my way to do so, which isn't going to go well).


If there is no chance for you to speak to her than don't beat yourself up for it. People change and she must have over the 2 years. I know when i haven't been in contact with someone for a long time who i used to get on with i tend to not feel the same way as i did back then as i realised my feelings have changed. I got a good friend who i havent seen in a few years and we contact each other less but thats cause we both have moved on and she isn't someone i see being a part of my life anymore like she was 7 years ago where i saw her as someone who i would be close to forever.

If she wanted to she could have got in contact herself but hasnt so try and make contact but if you dont get the response you want please move on with your life you tried and will have no regrets.
Reply 6
Original post by chikane
If there is no chance for you to speak to her than don't beat yourself up for it. People change and she must have over the 2 years. I know when i haven't been in contact with someone for a long time who i used to get on with i tend to not feel the same way as i did back then as i realised my feelings have changed. I got a good friend who i havent seen in a few years and we contact each other less but thats cause we both have moved on and she isn't someone i see being a part of my life anymore like she was 7 years ago where i saw her as someone who i would be close to forever.

If she wanted to she could have got in contact herself but hasnt so try and make contact but if you dont get the response you want please move on with your life you tried and will have no regrets.


Yeah that's my thought process exactly. I'm just trying to figure out how I should do this.

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending