Please help, Muslims will probably only understand

So you're willing to give up your perfect man just because he doesn't believe the same fairytales you do? Is that seriously the reason you're going to give up on him, even though you're not close to your family?

A prime example of how toxic religion can be.

Not only did you commit associating partners with Allah you have shown yourself to superior then the one that has created you. Which doesnt make any sense. So the only 'pointless dogma' is coming from you.

Lets reach the afterlife 'matey' and then lets see who lived a life worth living.

Our Beloved Prophet Muhammad (Sallahu Alayhi Waslaam) has said:
This world is a prison for the believers and paradise for the non-believers
[Sahih Muslim Book 042, Number 7058]

the reason I can't marry him is because, in islam, if a muslim girl marries a non muslim guy, the marriage is not valid. I'd literally be sleeping in sin. Yes, I've been with him up until now, but I don't know if I can mentally handle that for the rest of my life. Especially as I'm now finding myself becoming more religious as time has gone on. Don't want to marry him and have kids to just suddenly have a mental breakdown and change my mind about it all one day.

This is why I stated that Msulims would understand a bit better.

Look, the one who isn't making any sense here is you. How can I be "associating partners" with Allah when I don't even believe in God?

I am not superior to the one who created me because it's impossible to be superior to something that doesn't exist (Allah).

If there is no afterlife, which is by far the most likely outcome, then neither of us will find out anything because consciousness itself will cease to be. Again, quoting verses from the Quran is utterly meaningless and circular. It no more proves Islam true than the Harry Potter books prove Hogwarts.

At least if a couple are married then they are devoted to each other. You say it's not filthy but would you rather date a modest girl who is a virgin or perhaps she only had 1 boyfriend before, or a rotten little skank who has opened her legs to every man down the pub...

Yeah, I didn't think so.

Marriage of muslimahs to non muslims? Or sleeping around like a skank? I'm not sure which you consider health development so if you could clarify.

Because it's filthy, have some decency and self respect. Just my opinion seeing.

Are you saying if you got with a man who slept with many women and he suddenly turned his life around and became a better Muslim, you'd reject him because he slept around? Surely you'd overlook his previous and past experiences and actions and make a judgement for who he is, not what he's done?

1) Who the hell do you think you are judging girls who sleep around before marriage? It's really not your problem or any of your business. It was totally unnecessary and it screams bitterness/insecurity.
2) Hate to break it to you but it's not upto you to tell them if they lack self respect. They make their own minds up about that one. And if sex really was "filthy" and "indecent", Muslims wouldn't do it to have children.

I simply stated my opinion that is was filthy, am I not allowed that view?

It's my opinion that sleeping around is filthy, committing to your husband or wife to make love and conceive a gift from Allah swt is not filthy, it is a blessing.

It's down to personal opinion, something which apparently I'm not allowed to have around here.

Personally I would not marry a muslim who has slept around. I just wouldn't be able to do it.

One or two wives at the most. There will be a muslimah who will accept him but I'm not one of them, sorry.

OP does not need to waste time justifying anything. If you want to learn about islam read a book or use google

Out of curiosity would you prefer to marry a Muslim whose been born and raised in the West or in the Middle East/in an Islamic country?

At least Harry Potter was an enjoyable read

Western muslim 100%. The cultural differences would probably be too much. I'm half Egyptian though so maybe, possibly I would marry an Egyptian if he had good knowledge of western culture.

Western muslim 100%. The cultural differences would probably be too much. I'm half Egyptian though so maybe, possibly I would marry an Egyptian if he had good knowledge of western culture.

Right so how religious would you like him to be on a scale of 1-10?

I don't think you can mark it on a scale. I want him to be fully practicing and be pious but telling me to wear the niqab and never leave the house and I can only leave the house with his permission etc.

I don't really know what you mean.

Right so you want a reasonably religious guy whose a virgin, good looking, has chemistry with you and gets on well with you.

Its a needle in a haystack nowadays. But good luck nevertheless.

I don't think you can mark it on a scale. I want him to be fully practicing and be pious but telling me to wear the niqab and never leave the house and I can only leave the house with his permission etc.

I don't really know what you mean.

Hi, sorry for the long back story.

I come from a household of an extremely abusive mother and a father who never did anything to stop it.

A couple years ago, I managed to transfer university and move out, but my family would force me to regularly visit. Just before this, I met my non-Muslim boyfriend on a dating site, who lives in London. I am not from London nor do I go to university there. At this time I was (of course) in a bad place and, although I believed in Allah, I did not really care for religion.

Since being away from the abuse I've found more of a place for Allah in my heart. My boyfriend is almost the perfect man - except for the fact that he is not Muslim. He has good principles and doesn't drink or anything. Since becoming more religious, I've asked him about converting, and he will not consider it. I know I have no future with him.

Recently, I have cut contact with my mother and have stopped visiting my parents.

I am in my final year of university and am planning on moving to London after I have finished precisely because of my entire situation. London is so big and I feel like it will give me a greater chance of meeting friends, a life partner, and starting a new life where I can finally be happy.

I am having breakdowns at this moment because I feel like I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. I find it hard to connect with people. I have only two friends I feel like I really connect with, and then there's my boyfriend. At the age of twenty I've only ever connected with three people. The fact that I now have to only consider Muslim guys for partners has narrowed down my chances of finding another connection by so much. On top of that, I would have to find a Muslim guy who is willing to date, as I would want to be in a relationship with someone before marriage.

I also don't feel like I'm the kind of girl a Muslim guy will want to settle down with. I don't wear hijab and I feel like lot of people will automatically assume I'm not marriage material because of that. Also, I feel like many Muslim guys would want the approval of their parents before marrying someone. What Muslim parents would approve of a girl who has pretty much no ties with her family? I don't want to be used by a guy for fun and then get dumped for someone his parents chose.

I feel like I'm never going to have a connection with a Muslim guy, and my religion does not allow me to be with a non-Muslim, and therefore I see my future being filled with unhappiness and loneliness.

Advice or perspective would be appreciated.