How would you feel about your significant other going clubbing without you?

there's nothing wrong with him going clubbing without you (but i think you need to learn to trust him)

The issue here is ditching you to go out with his friends. If he's made plans to spend time with you then he should stick to them and turn down his friends, unless he invites you and you want to go. This isn't even an issue because you're his girlfriend. Ditching anyone you had plans with whether it be friends, family or significant other just because you've got a better offer is not cool at all.

I would speak to him and tell him that if he wants to go clubbing without you then he needs to do it on nights when he doesn't have plans with you.

The main issue for me is the double standard. We don't always have plans on certain evenings in which case it would seem to be cool, but it's the fact that if I suggest going out with my own friends seeing as he will be out anyway he will not like it. He doesn't like me going in nightclubs without him, whereas it's perfectly ok for him to without me.

It sounds like you both have some trust issues you need to work on. You are uncomfortable with him going out without you and he is the same with you, that's not a healthy relationship. How long have you been going out?

Lately this issue has caused a few disputes as my boyfriend regularly gets invited out to bars and clubs with his single friends. He's also a flirt and I tend to worry a bit and feel uncomfortable at the idea of it, but I don't like to prevent him or seem like I'm stopping him going.

One thing that majorly irritates me is how the plans often seem to be a last minute whim, whereas if he gave me some sort of notice like at least a few days in advance it wouldn't seem so bad. I will think it will be just us and then it turns out to be a lads night for him.

Sometimes he will invite me along but not always, and he says he likes to come home to me being there. If it were only a few hours I wouldn't mind this too much, but he won't come back till 3am, I will be in bed feeling cheesed off, and usually there's an argument about it the next morning.

I feel like it's a bit selfish because I've turned down invites from my friends in favour of being with him, whereas he will happily go out and leave me at home by myself. I've recently suggested when he goes out I may as well go for a night out with "the girls," but I can tell he doesn't like it so it feels like the relationship has a double standard.

Sounds like this guy wants to get with girls in the club and then wants to come home with you. Guys like that normally have a side dish (random hoe) and then come home to the main course (you). So he may have cheated on you, so I'll be careful if I were you with this guy.

We recently had another conversation over this. His friend invited him out on a whim last weekend and he turned it down in favour of being with me. However they are planning a night out in a few weeks so he says it will give me notice to make other plans. He texts me a lot while he is out as well. I do worry sometimes though as I know what his friends are like.

It's not healthy to only be with each other. You need your friends and a social life that doesn't just include him. He is not his single friends. He texts you when he's out? Why? That sounds very needy. You shouldn't need that much reassurance. What happens further down the line if he or you want a break with friends? A few days away?
If you trust him that little then your relationship is doomed anyway. Your lack of trust will push him away and he'll soon get fed up of having to text and constantly reassure you that he's not filled with lust for every female he meets.
You need to work on your self esteem a little. Perhaps you feel that you're not enough and undervalue yourself. If he's the right man for you he's not going anywhere. If he's not then let him go

I always find it disconcerting when a couple doesn't like their other half going clubbing without them.

If you actually think that he would cheat on you when out, then why are you still with each other? What's a relationship without trust.