The Student Room Group

Ever felt pressured to be in a relationship?

A lot of my friends are in relationships and sexually active, which I don't have a problem with at all. But one of my closer friends recently got into her first 'serious' relationship, and I feel like she felt kind of pressured into it, because so many of our friends have boyfriends too. I'm single and I don't have a problem with it, but she basically got into a relationship overnight - it was so sudden, which really surprised me.

She kind of hinted that she felt she had to be dating someone to 'fit in' with everyone else.

Has this ever happened to you?? I feel like this is quite common at this age (18 ish) when people are sometimes more interested in their partners than friends?
Sometimes but then I remember guys are immature and they smell :tongue:
Original post by MrsSheldonCooper
Sometimes but then I remember guys are immature and they smell :tongue:


:frown: k be sexist then.
I noticed this a lot when I was at school / uni. Not noticed it as much as an adult though.
Original post by AspiringUnderdog
:frown: k be sexist then.


The patriarchy is very real dude. I've seriously considered political lesbianism.
Original post by MrsSheldonCooper
The patriarchy is very real dude. I've seriously considered political lesbianism.


Being sexist back doesn't solve the problem. There are a lot of non-sexist males like me, should we be punished for the act of others?
You should only be in a relationship if you want to be in one. That normally means you think it is better than being single. Makes no sense imo just to be a sheep and get into one because everyone else is.

The only time I can think of pressure would be family and cultural pressure, which is harder to deal with than peer pressure.
Original post by AspiringUnderdog
Being sexist back doesn't solve the problem. There are a lot of non-sexist males like me, should we be punished for the act of others?


Yes duh. All men are evil :wink:




Spoiler

Original post by MrsSheldonCooper
Yes duh. All men are evil :wink:


Spoiler



I was about to cry I just realised lol
Reply 9
With food.
Original post by MrsSheldonCooper
Yes duh. All men are evil :wink:


Spoiler



I was about to cry I just realised lol
Reply 11
Original post by UWS
With food.


And me:h:
Reply 12
Original post by Goaded
And me:h:


Of course :h:

I could never forget :mmm:
Back when i was at school you had to fancy someone, if you didn't fancy anyone it meant you were a lesbian. Even now sometimes I'm asked about my relationship history and when i say I've never been with anyone and never intend to, they think it's odd. But hey, i live by my own standards, not society's.
Theres also the pressure from family as someone else has already said which is harder to deal with.
Mhm it's a weekly guaranteed topic :rolleyes:
Yes, as a matter of fact I have. My closest 2 friends started going out with guys at 14-15. I was someone shy and certainly not ready for dating. They found different boyfriends around 16 and those relationships lasted (for a while). By the time I was 17 I hadn't been kissed much less had a boyfriend. I was starting to get more attention from guys but I was still shy and certainly wouldn't have flirted with a crush or even a guy I found attractive. So one of my guy friends (who happened to be dating one of the above mentioned girls) told me he had a friend who wanted to date me. Um...okay. So I said yes. I wasn't particularly attracted to him at first but he was a nice guy - and I had never met him before so I'm wasn't even sure how he knew who I was - but I started dating him. Weirdly, we didn't go on a few dates to get to know each other we just started "dating". I did this because I thought it was 'time'. He was a nice guy actually and we dated for 2 years!! But, I only dated him because I felt my own pressure and because, frankly, I thought my girlfriend's were looking down on me and that they thought I must not be good enough to get a boyfriend.

In the long run I'm not sorry it happened. Like I said, he was a nice guy and treated me very well. He was kind, respectful, etc. He was a good 'learning' boyfriend. I know that sounds terrible but he was safe for me to learn about relationships with. We both went our separate ways when I entered uni. Certainly isn't the right advise for everyone but yes, I did feel pressured to enter into a relationship but not from the guy.

Now that I've been to uni I understand that A LOT of people don't enter into their first relationships until uni or even afterwards. There is no set time table and if you feel your friends are judging you they may not be that great of friends. There is no right time or age to enter into a relationship and I don't suggest getting into one 'just because' but that is what I did..... and it was actually okay.
not really. Would rather have a gf if I met someone nice though.

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