I think we're coming to understand more about gender, but I think that conversation is being derailed by people not listening to what the science says and instead are thinking about the topic emotionally.
From the way it seems to me, gender and biological sex are different, and it's possible for a person to develop with a mismatch between these two. But I'm not convinced there are a hundred and one different scenarios here - it seems like it's one, or the other, or an indeterminate point in-between. Identifying as another species, or an age-kin, or an Apache attack helicopter, seem likely (to me) not to be biological problems but psychological ones.
Having said that, I'm open to looking at new evidence and listening to people's experiences. At the end of the day, I think the most important thing is what stance towards it would promote the most well-being in society, irrespective of the causes or exact nature of the phenomenon.