Losing my virginity

I'm 16 and want to lose my virginity but the boy is 21, I have never done anything sexually before and I am scared that it will hurt really bad and that the boy will never talk to me again if I'm really bad ??

Reply 1

Wanderlust96

8

If you're afraid he might never talk to you again after, then I can't imagine you know him all that well. It's your body and by extension your choice, but don't you think you'd be more relaxed if the first time you had sex was with someone you trusted?

Ok den

OP

Original post by Wanderlust96

If you're afraid he might never talk to you again after, then I can't imagine you know him all that well. It's your body and by extension your choice, but don't you think you'd be more relaxed if the first time you had sex was with someone you trusted?

I do feel like I know him and want to do it but as he's a lot older I feel like I will get compared and obviously won't be as good as the girls he's had before

Reply 4

jimbojohn

12

your too young for him he will go prison

Reply 5

username2393237

21

Original post by jimbojohn

your too young for him he will go prison

16 is legal, but the age gap is dodgy. What would a 21 year old want with a 16 year old?

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 6

Matilda122

OP

Original post by jimbojohn

your too young for him he will go prison

It's legal

Reply 7

Wanderlust96

8

Original post by Matilda122

I do feel like I know him and want to do it but as he's a lot older I feel like I will get compared and obviously won't be as good as the girls he's had before

It shouldn't be a competition, but you're right in one thing, he is a lot older. There's five years difference there, and that's within a pivotal stage of mental development. Since you're asking for advice I'll be completely honest. You don;t sound like you're particularly ready to be having sex. You're sixteen and scared of physical pain and immediate rejection afterwards. That doesn't make for a comfortable first time. What's the rush, you're barely legal?

Reply 8

Matilda122

OP

Original post by Wanderlust96

It shouldn't be a competition, but you're right in one thing, he is a lot older. There's five years difference there, and that's within a pivotal stage of mental development. Since you're asking for advice I'll be completely honest. You don;t sound like you're particularly ready to be having sex. You're sixteen and scared of physical pain and immediate rejection afterwards. That doesn't make for a comfortable first time. What's the rush, you're barely legal?

Thanks for your advice I am more scared for the mental pain and feeling of rejection rather than physical pain, I just feel that he's really good looking and I won't find somebody like this again but then that's another main reason why I'm thinking about rejection because of how good looking he is all the girls he could have

Reply 9

jimbojohn

12

are u tellimg me a girl who barely has finished yr11 exams can legally have sex with a guy who would've finished uni ready to start his career. come on thats dodgy. and trust me Matilda it won't end well i have seen similar senarios. you wont hwar from him after a couple weeks. you turn in to an acquaintance.

Reply 10

jimbojohn

12

sorry for the bad spelling been at work since 6 am this morning and will do again in the am hence tiredness.

Reply 11

Jahir

15

Original post by jimbojohn

are u tellimg me a girl who barely has finished yr11 exams can legally have sex with a guy who would've finished uni ready to start his career. come on thats dodgy. and trust me Matilda it won't end well i have seen similar senarios. you wont hwar from him after a couple weeks. you turn in to an acquaintance.

I agree that's dodgy.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by jimbojohn

are u tellimg me a girl who barely has finished yr11 exams can legally have sex with a guy who would've finished uni ready to start his career. come on thats dodgy. and trust me Matilda it won't end well i have seen similar senarios. you wont hwar from him after a couple weeks. you turn in to an acquaintance.

Go to bed john

Reply 13

i love grimes

10

Original post by Matilda122

Thanks for your advice I am more scared for the mental pain and feeling of rejection rather than physical pain, I just feel that he's really good looking and I won't find somebody like this again but then that's another main reason why I'm thinking about rejection because of how good looking he is all the girls he could have

he's obviously nothing more than a trophy to you, chances are he thinks the same way. either grow the balls to screw him or dont. its not up to us

Reply 14

apeshit007

2

Original post by matilda122

i'm 16 and want to lose my virginity but the boy is 21, i have never done anything sexually before and i am scared that it will hurt really bad and that the boy will never talk to me again if i'm really bad ??

FCK THE VIRGINITY.
21-16 is 5 years btw I did the maths for you.

Reply 15

Matilda122

OP

Original post by cloudyeyes

he's obviously nothing more than a trophy to you, chances are he thinks the same way. either grow the balls to screw him or dont. its not up to us

He's not a trophy ??? And I wanted advice if your not interested then go somewhere else ??

Reply 16

i love grimes

10

Original post by Matilda122

He's not a trophy ??? And I wanted advice if your not interested then go somewhere else ??

you're delusional if you actually like him yet acknowledge he'd leave you for not having sexual experience

Reply 17

Eleanor161

Firstly, that may be illegal depending on where you live. In some areas of the world the age of consent is above 16 years. Make sure you fully understand the laws of your country/state/whatever before you do anything.

Secondly, if you're concerned this person may never talk to you again if things don't go too well, you obviously don't feel you can trust and rely on them. Either that or you don't know him very well at all. I'm not saying that your first time has to be perfect and magical, or that you have to be sure you're going to end up spending the rest of your life with the person, but you want it to at least be with someone you trust and who cares for you. The first time is often awkward and a bit embarrassing and uncomfortable - it's a much nicer and easier experience if you're with someone you feel you can be open with and won't judge/will respect you.

Lastly, I wouldn't advise going for full intercourse on your first go. Try something else, like oral sex, a few times beforehand, because a) physically you'll be better prepared for it that way and b) it will be less awkward and uncomfortable if you've already got a bit of sexual experience with other stuff. You'll feel more prepared emotionally.

Good luck and best wishes whatever you choose to do :smile:

Reply 18

username2393237

21

Original post by jimbojohn

are u tellimg me a girl who barely has finished yr11 exams can legally have sex with a guy who would've finished uni ready to start his career. come on thats dodgy. and trust me Matilda it won't end well i have seen similar senarios. you wont hwar from him after a couple weeks. you turn in to an acquaintance.