I have been with my boyfriend for over three years. We are both university students and are serious about each other. We have discussed marriage in the near future.
So here goes:We met through Instagram, and to this day this social media platform seems to control us. We have had our fair share of trust issues throughout the years, I trusted him wholly at the start of our relationship, he didn’t. He trusts me fully now, and I don’t (mainly due to his criticism on my physique).
Cutting to the chase- our ongoing problem is his Instagram habits.
For over a year, he has been refusing to unfollow the countless random girls he has been following since he was single. He refuses to stop liking photos of girls he doesn’t know too. I am fine with him appreciating his friends’ photos, unless it is revealing. However, I refuse to comprehend the need for him to continue to appreciate photos of girls he does not know and Instagram models/celebrities. I understand it is okay to find another person attractive other than your SO, but him actually double-tapping these photos after numerous arguments, seems like a level of interaction that is not needed. Why does he feel the need to compliment them?
He would like photos of almost naked girls and tell me that he liked the photo purely because of the background, or their tattoos? How believable is this? He has stopped liking bikini photos for the time being, but he stopped last year and started again. So I don’t know how long it is going to last this time around.
He tells me over and over, that these girls are not IRL so I should not worry. Nonetheless, they are real people?
He is now an aspiring Instagram model. He has created a public page, and has started following random girls again, and liking their photos. His reasoning- he is trying to build his page up. I am okay with him becoming an Instagram model, I do not care for who likes or follows his posts, but I do care for who he follows and likes photos of. I asked him what is more important to him? Me or this Instagram hype? He said both are on the same level. I feel like I will never be good enough for him, that he constantly needs to see these beautiful sexy women on his feed on a daily basis.
I do not understand where I stand in this relationship anymore as neither of us are backing down. I continuously feel uncomfortable when he interacts with these hot girls. He said he won’t stop and that the issue is me being insecure and that I do not love myself enough.
Alongside this, I am battling depression and anxiety. I am struggling to see if there is a solution for this.
Am I being irrational? Please help!