How are you feeling right now? MKV

True. I think they took it as a personal attack, I guess
And thanks . That does make me feel better. Eurgh. I wish I didn't overanalyse things...

Don't do that cause she'll beat you up to then ask me who you are. She'll think I'm cheating on her.

Prsom!

It's a joke me and @TheAlchemistress have about arranged marriage 😂 I still don't think I'm getting one

I never thought anything could be worse than the recurring dreams I'd have as a kid, but now that I'm seeing the recurring theme of being forced to watch my dad be killed in different settings each time is making me rethink that, and it's absolutely terrifying.
Some twisted ****ed part of me wishes I'd dream about my abuse instead, even though nothing triggers my anxiety and depression more.
Is that normal? I never want to relive it, but at this point anything seems better than watching my dad get slaughtered every night.

What is this

Awww I guess it's natural to not want people to worry about you, but it's also natural to worry yourself, so it's basically a circle. But can you imagine a world in which not a single person cared about anyone? That's why it needs to be like this

The doc says that she'd definitely be proud I mean, just look what you've come through - that takes a lot of strength And before you attempt to make a counter-argument, remember that your stubbornness doesn't work on me

Triggered.
I hate feeling like I've lost the control I thought I had over knowing which things make it worse. Like ZAYN's new song????? Like, are you fr?!?!1?!?! I don't understand how I was stupid enough to think it was going to be okay, that speaking to one person over summer was going to make it stop.
Now, when I'm travelling around the city I'm terrified I'll see one of them. If I see someone who remotely even looks like one of them, I freeze. Then I'll spend 2 weeks thinking myself sick about what would happen should we meet again.
Then I have to exert all of my limited energy into putting up a facade so I don't have to use non-existent energy in telling people I'm okay.

Why do I do this to myself? Why is it so hard for desis to talk about Mental Ill Health? Why is it so hard to make people understand that you're genuinely sick? Why can't desi parents show the same concern about Mental Health as they do about Physical Health? I mean, I was dragged to the hospital a few weeks ago because I wasn't eating or getting hungry. Why can't any concern be shown about the fact that I don't sleep, or how hard it is to get out of bed, or how I just can't bring myself to interact with the people I love, or how I can procrastinate the most important things for weeks, or how being begged to do something can't even get me to move. Why is it okay for your kid to tell you they're taking Antidepressants, and then for you to act like you don't know anything after saying once that you don't want them taking it? Why is it even okay for a parent to say they don't want their kid taking drugs for their Mental Health when they've done nothing to ensure that their kid is well and knows they have support should they need it? Why is it okay for a parent not to think about what their kid's Mental state might be after they manage to speak up about their abuse 7 and 4 years later? Why is it okay for parents not to be able to identify when their kid is shutting off?

When will all this change?


Sorry.

P*ssed off with the world.

what's wrong?