The Student Room Group

Is it okay to not have friends at uni?

Because I've realised that I'm more comfortable being by myself, to be honest.

Is there going to be a lot of disadvantages that I may face due to this?
It’s okay. I prefer to be alone at uni too so I haven’t attempted to make friends. I hardly even talk to my own flatmates 😂
Reply 2
Original post by Kevin Hodge
It’s okay. I prefer to be alone at uni too so I haven’t attempted to make friends. I hardly even talk to my own flatmates 😂


My flatmates and I are on good terms, like we say hi and stuff and I just spoke to one of them in the kitchen, actually. I also socialised a bit with a group of people from my building (went to restaurant). After this, though, I realised that I don't actually care a lot if I have friends or not and I'm not gonna make a huge effort to make them.

Have you experienced any negatives of not having friends?
Reply 3
Advantages: people don't bother you/talk to you in the middle of lectures, you can sit where you want, usually easier to concentrate in general
Disadvantages: group work/lab work a lot of the time you have to choose groups yourself, and it can be awkward when you're on your own. Lots of field work on my course but I usually do it alone whenever possible and I prefer it like this. Sometimes there'll be other people without partners/groups and they'll approach you asking if they can work with you. A few times I've said "sorry I'm just working on my own" and then not realised that it was probably a bit rude. So another disadvantage is that other people probably think you're being anti social, when you just prefer to do things alone.
Last one I can think of is not having many people to discuss assessments/exams with, but in 1st year when I was more social I noticed most people end up doing the work at the last minute, and there's usually one person in the group who they all turn to a week before the deadline (that person was me), so I didn't gain much from speaking to people about work anyway. I'm not sure how it is with other students but my experience is that most people either don't know the content or don't want to help you/anyone anyway.

So my advice is to just pay as much attention as you can, make sure you interact with the lecturer (I usually sit at the front so I can do this easily) and still try to be friendly or give a smile when someone sits next to you, because you might end up needing to work in a group one day.
(edited 6 years ago)
Reply 4
Do people think you're weird or anything if you don't have friends or is it a normal thing at uni (esp in first year)? @Kevin Hodge
Reply 5
Original post by Petulia
Advantages: people don't bother you/talk to you in the middle of lectures, you can sit where you want, usually easier to concentrate in general
Disadvantages: group work/lab work a lot of the time you have to choose groups yourself, and it can be awkward when you're on your own. Lots of field work on my course but I usually do it alone whenever possible and I prefer it like this. Sometimes there'll be other people without partners/groups and they'll approach you asking if they can work with you. A few times I've said "sorry I'm just working on my own" and then not realised that it was probably a bit rude. So another disadvantage is that other people probably think you're being anti social, when you just prefer to do things alone.
Last one I can think of is not having many people to discuss assessments/exams with, but in 1st year when I was more social I noticed most people end up doing the work at the last minute, and there's usually one person in the group who they all turn to a week before the deadline (that person was me), so I didn't gain much from speaking to people about work anyway. I'm not sure how it is with other students but my experience is that most people either don't know the content or don't want to help you/anyone anyway.

So my advice is to just pay as much attention as you can, make sure you interact with the lecturer (I usually sit at the front so I can do this easily) and still try to be friendly or give a smile when someone sits next to you, because you might end up needing to work in a group one day.


Thank you :smile:

I'm in the group chat for my course so I can always discuss exams/work there if I need to.
Reply 6
@Petulia I will still try to be approachable in lectures and be nice to class mates, of course.
Original post by Anonymous
Do people think you're weird or anything if you don't have friends or is it a normal thing at uni (esp in first year)? @Kevin Hodge


It’s normal. Most people are in a similar situation to you and it take time to settle in and make friends. You could consider joining some societies which lol help.
Reply 8
Original post by Kevin Hodge
It’s normal. Most people are in a similar situation to you and it take time to settle in and make friends. You could consider joining some societies which lol help.


Yeah I will be joining societies and stuff.

I'm just asking this question for the purpose of clearing up this idea in my head that it's a necessity to make friends.
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah I will be joining societies and stuff.

I'm just asking this question for the purpose of clearing up this idea in my head that it's a necessity to make friends.


I mean it will help but it’s not a necessity.
Nah you should make an effort. Otherwise you’d have to make up for it by going to gym why no friends but a ripped af
Original post by Dominoes
Nah you should make an effort. Otherwise you’d have to make up for it by going to gym why no friends but a ripped af


I'm a girl lol. I'm not bad looking though if that equates to 'ripped af' haha.

I will make an effort, but not too big of one.
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous
I'm a girl lol. I'm not bad looking though if that equates to 'ripped af' haha.

I will make an effort, but not too big of one.


Nah Im the same, Im a girl too and I don't like to mix too much. First 2 years I was very social so became really popular and people would always invite me to parties and stuff and that was fun for a while but then it becomes really hard to concentrate and focus because everyone knows you and always chatting to you on campus or inviting you out and it becomes hard to get your own time.

And final year I realised theres no point, most of us literally not gonna see each other after this cuz everyone is just going to go into jobs and have new friends then catch up gets really hard with hectic schedules- I saw this with my senior batches.

So now I am bit more chilled and withdrawn, don't think anyone finds it weird. Uni is a lot of independent work not huddling together and working together like school.

Make sure you have a couple of good friends maybe from school as well, who you can talk to when it gets really stressful with Uni or just chill out with when you want to socialise and you would be happy.

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending