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How do I stop getting attached to people so easily?

This has become a rare but reoccuring problem for me. Whenever I meet someone and I find them attractive I instantly become REALLY attached to them, although this happens rarely when it does it takes over my thoughts. I met a guy at the club and he was very interested, messaged me later but the conversation ended after two messages. The problem is all I can think about is him and why the conversation didnt lead to something else and if theres anythign wrong with me etc. How do I get over this?
Original post by Anonymous
....How do I get over this?


Wear a burka. Problem solved.
(edited 6 years ago)
Hey...atleast you feel attached to people. There are people like me who WANT to feel attracted to someone but is difficult af unless we spend tons of time with them (in my case doe). Anyway, it's not a good thing but not necessarily a bad thing either. Don't fret over something that comes NATURALLY to you. Can't do much about it if it's a part of your character.
Reply 3
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by JDieMstr
Hey...atleast you feel attached to people. There are people like me who WANT to feel attracted to someone but is difficult af unless we spend tons of time with them (in my case doe). Anyway, it's not a good thing but not necessarily a bad thing either. Don't fret over something that comes NATURALLY to you. Can't do much about it if it's a part of your character.


No I hardly ever feel attached to anyone, I usually block people out. When it happened this week I didnt even recognise myself, I'm obsessed with this guy which is a very new feeling to me but also a dangerous one. I'm trying to find ways to block him out.
Original post by uberteknik
wear a burka. Problem solved.

#halalsolutions
Reply 5
Avatar for UWS
UWS
21
Original post by Anonymous
No I hardly ever feel attached to anyone, I usually block people out. When it happened this week I didnt even recognise myself, I'm obsessed with this guy which is a very new feeling to me but also a dangerous one. I'm trying to find ways to block him out.


This is a common feeling for people who haven't had much relationship experience, it is likely to improve as you get older. I think the best thing to do is to keep meeting new people to distract yourself from your current crush. I was like you, then I learned to control my feelings and I pretty much lost feelings as quickly as I got them.
Reply 6
Avatar for Tom K16
Tom K16
7
All I can say is remember all the pain it causes. I got so attached to this girl I liked (she was my first crush) and a few weeks ago she rejected me (I'm still hurt now)
Reply 7
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by UWS
This is a common feeling for people who haven't had much relationship experience, it is likely to improve as you get older. I think the best thing to do is to keep meeting new people to distract yourself from your current crush. I was like you, then I learned to control my feelings and I pretty much lost feelings as quickly as I got them.


This is true, I'v never been in a relaionship due to me blocking people out. Yeah I have plenty of opportunity for that, just need to let loose. Thank you.
Reply 8
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by Tom K16
All I can say is remember all the pain it causes. I got so attached to this girl I liked (she was my first crush) and a few weeks ago she rejected me (I'm still hurt now)


I somewhat feel heart broken, Im thinking with time it will go.
Original post by Anonymous
No I hardly ever feel attached to anyone, I usually block people out. When it happened this week I didnt even recognise myself, I'm obsessed with this guy which is a very new feeling to me but also a dangerous one. I'm trying to find ways to block him out.


If you think it's gonna be harmful to you, do what you must.
Original post by JDieMstr
If you think it's gonna be harmful to you, do what you must.


hmm I will
Reply 11
Avatar for Tom K16
Tom K16
7
Original post by Anonymous
I somewhat feel heart broken, Im thinking with time it will go.


I feel the same. At the moment it doesn't feel like its gonna get better but I guess it will. Others have been here before us.
Original post by Tom K16
I feel the same. At the moment it doesn't feel like its gonna get better but I guess it will. Others have been here before us.

thats true, gives me some comfort
Reply 13
Avatar for Allie4
Allie4
20
find out where the emotional attachment comes from. usually it stems from not feeling loved enough by certain family members or friends or self-esteem issues. you cling on because you're desperate to be loved and wanted by this man or maybe any person who'll have you. not saying this to be rude, I've been there myself. You need to work on your relationship with yourself, learn to love and appreciate yourself until you get to the point in which you accept that you'd like to have someone in your life but you certainly don't NEED someone in your life.
Reply 14
Avatar for abc:)
abc:)
22
Original post by Anonymous
This has become a rare but reoccuring problem for me. Whenever I meet someone and I find them attractive I instantly become REALLY attached to them, although this happens rarely when it does it takes over my thoughts. I met a guy at the club and he was very interested, messaged me later but the conversation ended after two messages. The problem is all I can think about is him and why the conversation didnt lead to something else and if theres anythign wrong with me etc. How do I get over this?


Sleep with a lot of people. That's how I did it. You get to realising we're all pretty much the same weird hairless naked people at the end of the day. Nobody is special enough to agonise over. It also helped me to realise that sex can lead to nothing and that can be my choice rather than his.

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