Should I tell my girlfriend?

When I got with my girlfriend I was a virgin. We're both 24.
To save face I made up a couple of stories about I had sex on a beach once on holiday, or with my ex girlfriend.
I know she's been with 3 others guys before me. Her first actual boyfriend, a friend she knew who was kind of a thing, and then her ex; who she was with for a few years. It's since come to light this ex was not really right for her and seemed to just be with her for the sex, rather than an actual thing like she wanted.
Me and her seem to be perfect right now, we've been together several months and have planned on moving in together next year after her lease is up.

Do I come out and tell her I was a virgin before her? Or just leave it. Not wanting to brag but she's told me I'm the best she's been with and she meant it, so that performance backs up my lies. Would it ruin my relationship if I came out with it now.

Please help.

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u lost it both ways

By the sounds of it she's pretty Into you, if she really loves you I don't think she'll care that much about your Virginity. Come clean dude and tell her the truth.hope whatever you decide works out! :borat:

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 3

Seharxx

emmmmm it's not that big of a deal of to be honest, tell her if you want to

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

It's a pretty big deal to me

Reply 5

doggypounding 69

no don't tell her
Well it doesn't make any difference anyway

Reply 6

jkz76

If you're going to be together for a long time, it's probably best to let her know sooner rather than later. Just be honest with her, tell her everything and how you felt when you decided you needed to make up these stories. I don't know how she'll react, but I'd assume she'd be fine with it, or come round eventually.

edit: spelling

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Yeah I want to tell her but I'm embarrassed about it and I don't really want her to know that I've been with nobody else and she's been with 3 others guys.

Reply 8

jamesj477

she wont be embarrassed, if she said that u are the best shes had then why would she care. she might actually like the fact that shes the only girl uve slept with.

Reply 9

Amina190

Everyone has different history and the fact that she's been with more people than you shouldn't really be an issue. You should probably just tell her, right now it seems like a small issue and I doubt it will change anything but later on who knows whether you'll regret not tellin her now.

Reply 10

avecmoi

At the end of the day it's just about honesty. It's not a big deal, if it was the other way round (you said you were a v but you had had multiple partners) that would be bad. But yeah, you just want to go forward into your future with no secrets. If anything, maybe it's something you can laugh about together :smile:

Reply 11

maxafin

Buddy, Hate to say it. but on a beach on holiday? She already knows. You'll be fine. I'd just let her know :smile:

Reply 12

DrawTheLine

It depends. On the one hand, she could not care about it and be fine with it either way because you two are serious. On the other hand, she could think if he lies to me about this, then what else has he or will he lie to me about in the future?

Reply 13

sboocky

doesn't really make much of a different tbh. Unless you feel guilty, in which case just come clean, pretty harmless lie in my opinion though. It probably makes you feel equal in a way no?

Reply 14

Kenneye_j

Original post by Anonymous

Honestly, these TSR relationship threads are just extremely pointless and dumb. Nobody will tell you the truth, so let me tell you: you are wasting your life chasing what people call a "relationship". Nothing you or your girlfriend ever do, while you are completely obsessing over if you should tell the other about dumb things like if you were once a virgin, will be anything meaningful, and more and more people like you are choosing to focus all their energy and time on a pointless arrangement for human contact that will lead you nowhere whatsoever. I don't care what people say in response to this fact, people will say "if we are both happy then we are not wasting our lives", but this just your weak human mind convincing you to stay trapped in a "relationship" for all your life and never accomplish anything - purely for biological reasons.

Point is, drop all this relationship BS, and do something meaningful with your life. When you and many others have a more broader perspective on life, then maybe you will change your life focus and start doing something constructive.

Do something to help many people, not just yourself or your family/friends. Add something new and exceptional to this world. Do something actually meaningful. Or just spend your life going back and forth between pointless arguments and dumb situations/decisions like this one, resulting in absolutely nothing. Within a 100 years you will die - and chances are, you will live to be an elderly person. You will look back over your life and look at what you have actually achieved. Are relationships all you can really afford to care about? Your choice.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

Original post by maxafin

Buddy, Hate to say it. but on a beach on holiday? She already knows. You'll be fine. I'd just let her know :smile:

To be fair, it's not far from the truth, I met a girl, ended up doing some stuff in the pool, which thinking back now was disgusting, and then one night we went to the beach together with the intention, but there was a security bloke kicking about with a torch so we didn't. An I also mentioned about with my ex, basically she has just assumed we got to it, when we didn't because my ex was also a virgin and she was too scared to do it, I wasn't gonna force her so we just did oral all the time.

Reply 16

The RAR

Just have sex with her man, virgin or not :biggrin:

Reply 17

Retired_Messiah

I can foresee telling her going three possible ways:

1) "OMG ur a liar you *******" - possibly break up worthy but probably not unless she's a madting

2) "Idc m8 whatevs y u lie tho u silly" -neutral and totally fine

3) "Wait you were that good when you were a virgin? omg noice wut" - again, decent outcome

I'd tell her, keeping up lies is annoying and it shouldn't really go tooo badly for you so long as you can give some vague explanation as to why you lied in the first.

Reply 18

Anonymous #1

Original post by The RAR

Just have sex with her man, virgin or not :biggrin:

Oh believe me I have been, mad amounts of sex and she's hot as hell it's a dream.
She also loves to dish out head and handjobs, I don't wanna blow this (excuse the pun)

Reply 19

The RAR

Original post by Anonymous

Oh believe me I have been, mad amounts of sex and she's hot as hell it's a dream.
She also loves to dish out head and handjobs, I don't wanna blow this (excuse the pun)