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Debate: Would you dump your partner if he/she got fat?

My boyfriend told me that he'd leave me if I got fat. He claims that he isn't shallow because even though personality prevails, there has to be physical attraction in a relationship. Do you agree?

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Reply 1
The question is, would you leave him if he got fat?
Original post by euphonious
My boyfriend told me that he'd leave me if I got fat. He claims that he isn't shallow because even though personality prevails, there has to be physical attraction in a relationship. Do you agree?


In my opinion thats the thing about liking someone for their personality - if he does like your personality as he claims he does then he would still be attracted to you no matter your weight - i think attraction from personality just makes you find your partner more attracctive regardless of their appearance.
Reply 3
Original post by Ishax
The question is, would you leave him if he got fat?


No, I would not at all. I'd encourage him to diet, of course, simply because I wouldn't want his health to be at risk.
Reply 4
If he, out of the blue, said, "You're too fat, you're dumped." Then that would be abgn*

If he gives you some time to do something about it, "You're getting fat, if you don't do something about it, then I'll dump you." Then that, at least, would be fair. It would then be your choice whether you wanted to do something about that. Do you want to be with him? Someone who ranks your size over all of your other qualities?

*bang out of order.
Reply 5
Original post by BionicPinkyBear
In my opinion thats the thing about liking someone for their personality - if he does like your personality as he claims he does then he would still be attracted to you no matter your weight - i think attraction from personality just makes you find your partner more attracctive regardless of their appearance.


But according to him, he'd still leave me if I got fat regardless of my personality. So, what are you saying? He must not like my personality enough to stay with me if I did gain weight? Lmao.
Reply 6
Depends how fat and how much I value the relationship.
Reply 7
Original post by Pigster
If he, out of the blue, said, "You're too fat, you're dumped." Then that would be abgn*

If he gives you some time to do something about it, "You're getting fat, if you don't do something about it, then I'll dump you." Then that, at least, would be fair. It would then be your choice whether you wanted to do something about that. Do you want to be with him? Someone who ranks your size over all of your other qualities?

*bang out of order.


Just a bit of context: he didn't just say to me "oh, by the way, if you get fat I'm leaving you." I asked him if he would leave me if I gained weight, and he said yes. According to him "most guys would do the same thing", but I'm not so sure.
Original post by euphonious
But according to him, he'd still leave me if I got fat regardless of my personality. So, what are you saying? He must not like my personality enough to stay with me if I did gain weight? Lmao.


Atm yeah seems he doesnt like your personality enough if he can say tht but i mean he could change his mind if he was in that situation. But i mean everyone gains weight as they grow older so he isnt gonna be the same he will lose his looks too at some point. In general its a bit of a dickish thing to say tho to ur partner pretty much implies hes not gonna always stay with u
Reply 9
Original post by BionicPinkyBear
Atm yeah seems he doesnt like your personality enough if he can say tht but i mean he could change his mind if he was in that situation. But i mean everyone gains weight as they grow older so he isnt gonna be the same he will lose his looks too at some point. In general its a bit of a dickish thing to say tho to ur partner pretty much implies hes not gonna always stay with u


Well, if that's the case, I might as well leave him now then. Get in there first, haha.
Original post by Yaboi
Depends how fat and how much I value the relationship.


I see.
Original post by euphonious
Well, if that's the case, I might as well leave him now then. Get in there first, haha.


Well consider how much you like him first - perhaps its just a matter of growing up so if your willing to try and change his mind or wait for him to mature you dont have to end it - make him unable to leave you if you wish
Hunty, you can lose weight by dumping him. There are going to be so many people in this world who will find your body and your personality beautiful.
Original post by BionicPinkyBear
Well consider how much you like him first - perhaps its just a matter of growing up so if your willing to try and change his mind or wait for him to mature you dont have to end it - make him unable to leave you if you wish


Why would I want to waste my life trying to change his mind? He is 19 nearly 20, he isn't a child.
Original post by euphonious
According to him "most guys would do the same thing"


Your reply should be, "But you are not 'most guys'", He is hiding behind a stereotype that supports his comment. Judge and Executioner.

Again, I would ask you (to ask yourself), do you want to be with someone who would effectively force you to be a certain size rather than want to be with you, full stop?
Regardless of how much you liked her, you'd still choose to leave her?
i think being attracted to your partner is important but its not the MOST important thing, i personally woud never leave someone just cos they gained weight. I
I love him, he did get fat but he's still a great guy to me
Original post by Pigster
Your reply should be, "But you are not 'most guys'", He is hiding behind a stereotype that supports his comment. Judge and Executioner.

Again, I would ask you (to ask yourself), do you want to be with someone who would effectively force you to be a certain size rather than want to be with you, full stop?


I am so tempted to dump his ass, but I don't know if I'm just being pedantic.
Original post by euphonious
Why would I want to waste my life trying to change his mind? He is 19 nearly 20, he isn't a child.


Well the decision is down to how much you like him i guess

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