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I've joined Uni 4 weeks late and it feels so awkward

So, I transferred from a different Uni to this one and I'm pretty happy as I much prefer the course and the city and I'm not worried that I'll catch up with everything soon. However, I'm pretty worried socially. I'm a social guy but I took a gap year and then had my year at Uni last year so i'm starting Uni already late. I don't know anyone at this uni and I moved here on Thursday. I've met all my flat mates now but they're not a group and they all have their own individual groups and they're nice but they're just not connected with each other. I was hoping that they would be cool so I could just join their group but they never will be as they're too different. I relate to two of them of the most and one of them is pretty cool but he hangs around with his pals from school that he's known for years and it just seems awkward especially as he looks and acts a fair bit younger than me. Another one of my flatmates is similar but it's just awkward sometimes having conversations and they don't seem to want a long conversation and eats + spends most of his time in his room when he's in the flat. The first guy has said that I can go out with his mates but we haven't talked about it since and I just have a feeling it will be awkward. The block i'm in, I was told there was a group chat but it's not active anymore. I added myself to the course groupchat and that isn't active too. It just feels like I've lost the chance to connect with most people especially people in my block and everyone's comfortable and I don't like being extra social.
I've met one person in my course and he seems cool but again he has all of his mates from school here and I'm not sure how that will go. It's just pretty strange as I've been here and I don't know anyone on a good level. Also, I got diagnosed with anxiety and depression last month and no one knows about it and I have been given anti depressants. I've not touched and I'm going to terms to accept them as I've just started to realise how much I overthink scenarios and how my mood has shifted so negatively the past few months..
Reply 1
Avatar for luq_ali
luq_ali
21
Please keep on working towards your studies, don't get discouraged, and allow yourself time to patiently yet steadily open up to others, try to improve day by day-set some goals, small at first, then work toward those day by day, and except the little improvement, slow and steady, is the way to greater progress. I pray you will the greater social access you want to have, and that you will be successful in managing and making it through some of the obstacles you face, and that you will be successful in your studies.

Original post by krs132
So, I transferred from a different Uni to this one and I'm pretty happy as I much prefer the course and the city and I'm not worried that I'll catch up with everything soon. However, I'm pretty worried socially. I'm a social guy but I took a gap year and then had my year at Uni last year so i'm starting Uni already late. I don't know anyone at this uni and I moved here on Thursday. I've met all my flat mates now but they're not a group and they all have their own individual groups and they're nice but they're just not connected with each other. I was hoping that they would be cool so I could just join their group but they never will be as they're too different. I relate to two of them of the most and one of them is pretty cool but he hangs around with his pals from school that he's known for years and it just seems awkward especially as he looks and acts a fair bit younger than me. Another one of my flatmates is similar but it's just awkward sometimes having conversations and they don't seem to want a long conversation and eats + spends most of his time in his room when he's in the flat. The first guy has said that I can go out with his mates but we haven't talked about it since and I just have a feeling it will be awkward. The block i'm in, I was told there was a group chat but it's not active anymore. I added myself to the course groupchat and that isn't active too. It just feels like I've lost the chance to connect with most people especially people in my block and everyone's comfortable and I don't like being extra social.
I've met one person in my course and he seems cool but again he has all of his mates from school here and I'm not sure how that will go. It's just pretty strange as I've been here and I don't know anyone on a good level. Also, I got diagnosed with anxiety and depression last month and no one knows about it and I have been given anti depressants. I've not touched and I'm going to terms to accept them as I've just started to realise how much I overthink scenarios and how my mood has shifted so negatively the past few months..
Reply 2
Avatar for Wimbs
Wimbs
9
I would take those antidepressants. Your choice ultimately but I have taken them in the past (and frankly wished Id tried them at uni, I was too scared to then) and they work. You just see the world in a more positive light and its like a more positive world shines back at you. They do take a few weeks to kick in though. If the thought of that or taking chemicals puts you off, buy 5-HTP from Holland and Barrett. Its a precursor to serotonin (the feel good chemical in the brain) and I am on it now - it actually works minutes after the first dose. It doesnt seem to work for everyone though and there are side effects eg. appetite reduction.

I know it sounds cheesy and is easier said than done but why restrict yourself to your floor/block even? Heard of stairs? Your new best friend(s) might be the guys 2 floors up/down. Its scary but uni is about giving this a go. Personally I think that they should go back to the old days, I lived in a hall of 32 on one floor! If you cant find people you get on with then deffo you not them! 6/8 people is a low enough number that statistically you get a group of people who just arent particularly compatible.
Have you tried looking at what societies they have that you are interested in?

Societies are generally a good place to meet people with the same interests.
Reply 4
Avatar for krs132
krs132
OP
3
but I don't know how to approach the floor/block. There's no group chat and just my mood and overthinking is stopping me from being extra social. Also, I'm a bit too worried about the side effects of the anti depressants
Reply 5
Avatar for krs132
krs132
OP
3
Original post by Zactopus
Have you tried looking at what societies they have that you are interested in?

Societies are generally a good place to meet people with the same interests.



I'm going to look at them but I was half in two of them and it was pretty sad as I didn't make one mate from it and walking 20minutes to the building and just having awkward situations was just too much so I stopped it. It just didn't seem like anyone in 1st year cared that much

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