My Lecturers are harassing me
This is a serious issue and i will try and be anonymous as i can if the university clocks who i am.
The title says what it is. Basically i do not attend lectures due to my Social Anxiety and severe depression and the fact i have no friends in these lectures. I believe a student who attends lectures are there to join with their friends/squad.
For the past two years I've struggled attending lectures, last year i never attended one module yet i got an ok grade. This encouraged me to try and do this with all my modules this year, But a few of my modules include compulsory group work and i don't socialise with these people hence these people see me as wack, which is fine, i have given up trying to make friends and i'm likely to be recluse after graduating in 2 years time.
3 weeks into uni and these lecturers have been on my case like never before. One Lecturer after the lecture basically threatened me and said to my face 'you have to attend and not come late otherwise there will be consequences'. Another Lecturer i emailed because i have never attend a module so far replied back to me writing 'I'm afraid, were going to have to withdraw you from the module' like wtf????
. And to make things worse i get this feeling that my uni wants to get rid of me as fast as they can or make me suspend my studies and do it again next year just because i don't want to ****ing attend a lecture, it's so annoying. I even received a patronising email from the Course Leader tagging 3 of my module leaders on how to ****ing attend a lecture, it's embarrassing.
Truth is i want to drop out but due to African reasons, it's hard so i have to stay and Fight. I don't want to attend these lectures due to not having no friends so what i can do. How can i tell my lecturers to stay the **** back and let me do things my way? i do very well with my assignments and i don't care if i graduate with a third class honours or a 2:2 because i'm gonna be a recluse after uni.
The title says what it is. Basically i do not attend lectures due to my Social Anxiety and severe depression and the fact i have no friends in these lectures. I believe a student who attends lectures are there to join with their friends/squad.
For the past two years I've struggled attending lectures, last year i never attended one module yet i got an ok grade. This encouraged me to try and do this with all my modules this year, But a few of my modules include compulsory group work and i don't socialise with these people hence these people see me as wack, which is fine, i have given up trying to make friends and i'm likely to be recluse after graduating in 2 years time.
3 weeks into uni and these lecturers have been on my case like never before. One Lecturer after the lecture basically threatened me and said to my face 'you have to attend and not come late otherwise there will be consequences'. Another Lecturer i emailed because i have never attend a module so far replied back to me writing 'I'm afraid, were going to have to withdraw you from the module' like wtf????
. And to make things worse i get this feeling that my uni wants to get rid of me as fast as they can or make me suspend my studies and do it again next year just because i don't want to ****ing attend a lecture, it's so annoying. I even received a patronising email from the Course Leader tagging 3 of my module leaders on how to ****ing attend a lecture, it's embarrassing.Truth is i want to drop out but due to African reasons, it's hard so i have to stay and Fight. I don't want to attend these lectures due to not having no friends so what i can do. How can i tell my lecturers to stay the **** back and let me do things my way? i do very well with my assignments and i don't care if i graduate with a third class honours or a 2:2 because i'm gonna be a recluse after uni.
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change your mind,change your life?
People at uni do not bite
People at uni do not bite
Attending lectures has nothing to do with friendships. No-one is harassing you. Stop being angry and just go to the lectures.
Original post by Anonymous
This is a serious issue and i will try and be anonymous as i can if the university clocks who i am.
The title says what it is. Basically i do not attend lectures due to my Social Anxiety and severe depression and the fact i have no friends in these lectures. I believe a student who attends lectures are there to join with their friends/squad.
For the past two years I've struggled attending lectures, last year i never attended one module yet i got an ok grade. This encouraged me to try and do this with all my modules this year, But a few of my modules include compulsory group work and i don't socialise with these people hence these people see me as wack, which is fine, i have given up trying to make friends and i'm likely to be recluse after graduating in 2 years time.
3 weeks into uni and these lecturers have been on my case like never before. One Lecturer after the lecture basically threatened me and said to my face 'you have to attend and not come late otherwise there will be consequences'. Another Lecturer i emailed because i have never attend a module so far replied back to me writing 'I'm afraid, were going to have to withdraw you from the module' like wtf????. And to make things worse i get this feeling that my uni wants to get rid of me as fast as they can or make me suspend my studies and do it again next year just because i don't want to ****ing attend a lecture, it's so annoying. I even received a patronising email from the Course Leader tagging 3 of my module leaders on how to ****ing attend a lecture, it's embarrassing.
Truth is i want to drop out but due to African reasons, it's hard so i have to stay and Fight. I don't want to attend these lectures due to not having no friends so what i can do. How can i tell my lecturers to stay the **** back and let me do things my way? i do very well with my assignments and i don't care if i graduate with a third class honours or a 2:2 because i'm gonna be a recluse after uni.
The title says what it is. Basically i do not attend lectures due to my Social Anxiety and severe depression and the fact i have no friends in these lectures. I believe a student who attends lectures are there to join with their friends/squad.
For the past two years I've struggled attending lectures, last year i never attended one module yet i got an ok grade. This encouraged me to try and do this with all my modules this year, But a few of my modules include compulsory group work and i don't socialise with these people hence these people see me as wack, which is fine, i have given up trying to make friends and i'm likely to be recluse after graduating in 2 years time.
3 weeks into uni and these lecturers have been on my case like never before. One Lecturer after the lecture basically threatened me and said to my face 'you have to attend and not come late otherwise there will be consequences'. Another Lecturer i emailed because i have never attend a module so far replied back to me writing 'I'm afraid, were going to have to withdraw you from the module' like wtf????
. And to make things worse i get this feeling that my uni wants to get rid of me as fast as they can or make me suspend my studies and do it again next year just because i don't want to ****ing attend a lecture, it's so annoying. I even received a patronising email from the Course Leader tagging 3 of my module leaders on how to ****ing attend a lecture, it's embarrassing. Truth is i want to drop out but due to African reasons, it's hard so i have to stay and Fight. I don't want to attend these lectures due to not having no friends so what i can do. How can i tell my lecturers to stay the **** back and let me do things my way? i do very well with my assignments and i don't care if i graduate with a third class honours or a 2:2 because i'm gonna be a recluse after uni.
Your University will have an attendance policy, and you are undoubtedly in breach of it. Attend your lectures.
Original post by Blackstarr
change your mind,change your life?
People at uni do not bite
People at uni do not bite
I'm an introvert and sadly my course is a mixture of academic and practical lessons which i didn't think before even applying. I only chose this for a career i no longer want to do due to my depression.
I changed my life: I've accepted i'm a loner. It is too late in Second Year to make friends and it even worse for me as i should really be a third year but i'm not due to course changes.
I thought uni would change my poor social skills, instead it has made it worse.
I fear you are using your depression and social anxiety issues as an excuse, unfortunately.
Has your uni been made aware of your issues? Are you formally diagnosed? If so, then you should be able to get help.
Not all students go to uni lectures to catch up with their friends; they go to learn. Especially in their final years. It's not all about the social life. Plus, you don't need to be friends with people in order to do group work with them.
Please, go see your doctor and get the help you need.
Has your uni been made aware of your issues? Are you formally diagnosed? If so, then you should be able to get help.
Not all students go to uni lectures to catch up with their friends; they go to learn. Especially in their final years. It's not all about the social life. Plus, you don't need to be friends with people in order to do group work with them.
Please, go see your doctor and get the help you need.
Original post by Maker
I support your lecturers. Uni is for learning, if you want to make friends, join a club.
Then you don't care for people with mental health.
Universities need to understand that students that suffer from mental health and/or don't have friends will be really hard for them to attend lectures.
Luckily my mental health doesn't affect my assignments, i can do them, even when i'm drunk.
No one is harassing you. In life, you have to step out of your comfort zone to reach what you want.
People have depression and anxiety and still attend lectures. Not attending isn’t doing any good to you, it makes matters even worse.
I’m an African as well, and I get where you’re coming from. But in this situation your lecturers are right.
People have depression and anxiety and still attend lectures. Not attending isn’t doing any good to you, it makes matters even worse.
I’m an African as well, and I get where you’re coming from. But in this situation your lecturers are right.
So you havent been attending lectures that require group work? Sorry but you have to suck it up and deal with it. You can't run from your problems.
Ignore all the hate comments because they clearly don't understand your situation. Lectures shouldn't be compulsory anyway - well not for my uni. So how are you doing in your seminars then because they must be more intense right?.
I think it's worth contacting your disability department and you can probably have a mental health advocate or worker.
Inbox me if you want to talk.
I think it's worth contacting your disability department and you can probably have a mental health advocate or worker.
Inbox me if you want to talk.
Original post by Airmed
I fear you are using your depression and social anxiety issues as an excuse, unfortunately.
Has your uni been made aware of your issues? Are you formally diagnosed? If so, then you should be able to get help.
Not all students go to uni lectures to catch up with their friends; they go to learn. Especially in their final years. It's not all about the social life. Plus, you don't need to be friends with people in order to do group work with them.
Please, go see your doctor and get the help you need.
Has your uni been made aware of your issues? Are you formally diagnosed? If so, then you should be able to get help.
Not all students go to uni lectures to catch up with their friends; they go to learn. Especially in their final years. It's not all about the social life. Plus, you don't need to be friends with people in order to do group work with them.
Please, go see your doctor and get the help you need.
I am diagnosed. i have had two different types of help from my uni but non has worked so far. I have researched different types of help and it involves private doctors which the nhs doesn't cover.
I understand what you mean. But i can't keep sitting alone in the lectures. That's something that is acceptable in first year but if second/third year your still doing that, people would question in their minds. I have overheard conversations (not about me) on how people perceive people sitting alone or being a loner in uni. So it i'm anxious on how people would perceive me as.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm an introvert and sadly my course is a mixture of academic and practical lessons which i didn't think before even applying. I only chose this for a career i no longer want to do due to my depression.
I changed my life: I've accepted i'm a loner. It is too late in Second Year to make friends and it even worse for me as i should really be a third year but i'm not due to course changes.
I thought uni would change my poor social skills, instead it has made it worse.
I changed my life: I've accepted i'm a loner. It is too late in Second Year to make friends and it even worse for me as i should really be a third year but i'm not due to course changes.
I thought uni would change my poor social skills, instead it has made it worse.
Have you seen a counselor or a mental health professional
about this?
I know how you feel because i have been there and even now sometimes feel like that when i am in social situations.
Perhaps seeing someone you trust(there must be someone to say the least)
I do not think it is ever to late to make friends because life is what you make of it.
Sure, there can be circumstances which are out of your control but at the end of the day, you can choose to dwell on them or move on.
Being an introvert does not mean you cannot make long lasting friendships.
Try and attend those lectures because if you don't you are only making the situation worse for yourself.
With group work, try to stick it out and approach people if they do not mind working with you.
I know everything is easier said than done but at the end of the day your life is in your hands.
You can do it
Original post by Seamus123
Grow up.
You don't get it.
Original post by Anonymous
Then you don't care for people with mental health.
Universities need to understand that students that suffer from mental health and/or don't have friends will be really hard for them to attend lectures.
Luckily my mental health doesn't affect my assignments, i can do them, even when i'm drunk.
Universities need to understand that students that suffer from mental health and/or don't have friends will be really hard for them to attend lectures.
Luckily my mental health doesn't affect my assignments, i can do them, even when i'm drunk.
[QUOTE="Anonymous;74183360"]
Everyone has mental health. What has having friends to do with attending lectures? IF you don't attend lecturers, how would you make friends in the lecturers? Are you a bit dense?
Original post by Anonymous
Then you don't care for people with mental health.
Universities need to understand that students that suffer from mental health and/or don't have friends will be really hard for them to attend lectures.
Luckily my mental health doesn't affect my assignments, i can do them, even when i'm drunk.
Universities need to understand that students that suffer from mental health and/or don't have friends will be really hard for them to attend lectures.
Luckily my mental health doesn't affect my assignments, i can do them, even when i'm drunk.
Grow up and stop using this sort of thing as a false pretence. You came on here thinking people were going to buy it but no-one did, everyone here is telling you the proper way you should approach it...if you don't want to listen then get out
Original post by Anonymous
I am diagnosed. i have had two different types of help from my uni but non has worked so far. I have researched different types of help and it involves private doctors which the nhs doesn't cover.
I understand what you mean. But i can't keep sitting alone in the lectures. That's something that is acceptable in first year but if second/third year your still doing that, people would question in their minds. I have overheard conversations (not about me) on how people perceive people sitting alone or being a loner in uni. So it i'm anxious on how people would perceive me as.
I understand what you mean. But i can't keep sitting alone in the lectures. That's something that is acceptable in first year but if second/third year your still doing that, people would question in their minds. I have overheard conversations (not about me) on how people perceive people sitting alone or being a loner in uni. So it i'm anxious on how people would perceive me as.
Then, unfortunately, it is a matter of forcing yourself to not give a damn what others think of you. Who cares if you have overheard conversations? People are judgemental arses, that's just how the world is. It doesn't matter if you are going to be a recluse, you still need to learn how to deal with people and social situations. Otherwise, your degree will be a waste of money.
I am anxious about how people perceive me too. As someone who will have life-long mental health conditions, I know the struggle. But you shouldn't let your mental health affect your degree (to the best of your abilities).
Please, go back to your uni mental health team and discuss your options. They may be able to explain your situation to your lecturers. Return to your GP and see about even simple CBT or medication. CBT could be beneficial, as you seem to have a problem with perception.
I wish you all the best.
Original post by Anonymous
This is a serious issue and i will try and be anonymous as i can if the university clocks who i am.
The title says what it is. Basically i do not attend lectures due to my Social Anxiety and severe depression and the fact i have no friends in these lectures. I believe a student who attends lectures are there to join with their friends/squad.
For the past two years I've struggled attending lectures, last year i never attended one module yet i got an ok grade. This encouraged me to try and do this with all my modules this year, But a few of my modules include compulsory group work and i don't socialise with these people hence these people see me as wack, which is fine, i have given up trying to make friends and i'm likely to be recluse after graduating in 2 years time.
3 weeks into uni and these lecturers have been on my case like never before. One Lecturer after the lecture basically threatened me and said to my face 'you have to attend and not come late otherwise there will be consequences'. Another Lecturer i emailed because i have never attend a module so far replied back to me writing 'I'm afraid, were going to have to withdraw you from the module' like wtf????. And to make things worse i get this feeling that my uni wants to get rid of me as fast as they can or make me suspend my studies and do it again next year just because i don't want to ****ing attend a lecture, it's so annoying. I even received a patronising email from the Course Leader tagging 3 of my module leaders on how to ****ing attend a lecture, it's embarrassing.
Truth is i want to drop out but due to African reasons, it's hard so i have to stay and Fight. I don't want to attend these lectures due to not having no friends so what i can do. How can i tell my lecturers to stay the **** back and let me do things my way? i do very well with my assignments and i don't care if i graduate with a third class honours or a 2:2 because i'm gonna be a recluse after uni.
The title says what it is. Basically i do not attend lectures due to my Social Anxiety and severe depression and the fact i have no friends in these lectures. I believe a student who attends lectures are there to join with their friends/squad.
For the past two years I've struggled attending lectures, last year i never attended one module yet i got an ok grade. This encouraged me to try and do this with all my modules this year, But a few of my modules include compulsory group work and i don't socialise with these people hence these people see me as wack, which is fine, i have given up trying to make friends and i'm likely to be recluse after graduating in 2 years time.
3 weeks into uni and these lecturers have been on my case like never before. One Lecturer after the lecture basically threatened me and said to my face 'you have to attend and not come late otherwise there will be consequences'. Another Lecturer i emailed because i have never attend a module so far replied back to me writing 'I'm afraid, were going to have to withdraw you from the module' like wtf????
. And to make things worse i get this feeling that my uni wants to get rid of me as fast as they can or make me suspend my studies and do it again next year just because i don't want to ****ing attend a lecture, it's so annoying. I even received a patronising email from the Course Leader tagging 3 of my module leaders on how to ****ing attend a lecture, it's embarrassing.Truth is i want to drop out but due to African reasons, it's hard so i have to stay and Fight. I don't want to attend these lectures due to not having no friends so what i can do. How can i tell my lecturers to stay the **** back and let me do things my way? i do very well with my assignments and i don't care if i graduate with a third class honours or a 2:2 because i'm gonna be a recluse after uni.
When you join university you agree to abide by their rules, that means the uni generally and that of your department.
In normal circumstances they do not care if you attend lectures or not, but they do expect you to turn up to practicals, tutorials and participate in group work. If you are unable to do this, then you have to question whether its the degree course for you?
Try talking to welfare or the disabilities section to see if they can assist. IT seems a little silly to pay all that money and not attend. If you are determined not to make an effort, then the Uni it seems will withdraw you and I can see why. It is likely you will be asked to leave.
My tip is to go and see the GP and get medical confirmation that its due to anxiety an depression, this could prove very important in the future. You could suspend your studies. After you leave then do not go back until you have it under control or consider transferring to a degree by distance learning or the OU where you dont have to meet anyone. If you are going to become a recluse then thats not going to help you. Your life, your choice, but that doesnt mean they wont withdraw you.
PS Even if depressed it has to be the anxiety, because its not normal to refuse to go to lectures because you dont have friends. lectures are there for the lecture not to be with friends. I dont have your mental issues, but simply not caring and focusing on the lecturer is enough, thats what everyone else should be doing. Same for group work. You dont have to like them you just have to get the work done.
PPS Not sure if its harassment, but they have a right to be concerned as its their course.
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by mrsoliviacross
Ignore all the hate comments because they clearly don't understand your situation. Lectures shouldn't be compulsory anyway - well not for my uni. So how are you doing in your seminars then because they must be more intense right?.
I think it's worth contacting your disability department and you can probably have a mental health advocate or worker.
Inbox me if you want to talk.
I think it's worth contacting your disability department and you can probably have a mental health advocate or worker.
Inbox me if you want to talk.
Exactly..
Even one lecturer last year when i did a resit presentation told me that 'attendance is not important' yet this year it seems every lecturer must have heard about me last year and seem to put immense pressure on me to attend.
I've tried mental health services twice and the two types of sessions i had didn't help me. I've accepted this is my life. I've accepted i can't socialise and i don't care about the future because i'm forever alone.
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