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Hate uni, advice on what to do?

Hi guys, here's a little background on my story.

I joined uni in September (just before I turned 18, because living in India allowed me to finish a year early). I see now that it seems to be a mistake, because it's been extremely difficult making friends and the ones I have aren't like me at all - extremely introvertish, not too social, don't go to each others rooms to hang out etc. Not only that, the people I've come across in my lectures and tutorials don't speak to me. Once in a tutorial, 4 girls walked in, saw I had 4 empty chairs next to me, and went over to the other side. These same girls could barely even said Hi to me when I said Hi. This is one such incident of many in the past month and a half. I feel constantly judged, my self-esteem is at an all time low and it's been terrible. Making friends of the opposite sex has been a literal **** show, they all look through me. Moreover, I felt like if the course was good, it would be fine, but I'm bored to death. I'm just doing the exact thing I've done before, with no practicality or skills being taught as it should in a management course. The contact hours are minimal and I figured it would be fine if I had friends, but I don't. It's horrible and not at all what I'm used to. Everyone else (all my friends from school) that are at uni, are having the time of their lives. Constantly busy, and I crave that. I'm really thinking of dropping out and reapplying for next year in a uni that has something that I need. Does anyone know how to go about this or have any advice on how I should cope with this?

Reply 1

Crumpet1

Try some clubs and societies to widen your circle. Sticking with your current university and just working on meeting new people through different routes sounds like a better plan than starting again somewhere else. There are thousands of people at university, you just haven't met the right ones yet.

Reply 2

Sachi K

Original post by Crumpet1

I've tried clubs and societies! And the same thing has happened there too, which is why I'm feeling incredibly discouraged. Honestly, it's not just about friends, as I stated. It's about my course as well.

Reply 3

Crumpet1

Original post by Sachi K

If you've studied business before, then you're going to find the first few weeks repetitive no matter where you study. They need to get everybody up to speed with each other, and that means making sure that everyone has the basics.

I find it a little difficult to believe that you have already exhausted all your friendship options at your accommodation, course and clubs & socs, only 3 to 4 weeks after you started? These things take time, you're not going to have friends like you had at school, in a matter of only weeks. Are you really sure that you have given it enough of a try?

Reply 4

Sachi K

Original post by Crumpet1

It's not just about the basics. It's a very academic course and I'm not enjoying it. I'm not learning any business skills. I don't have the option of a placement and it's just making me feel really bored of it.

As for friends, perhaps it's hard to believe but it's been literal hell for me and I'm living it. All the clubs and societies I've gone to have had people treat me the way I got treated during the tutorial stated above. It's taking a toll on my mental health, and I don't know if sticking it out is worth it if I'm going to get depressed, which has happened before.

Reply 5

Crumpet1

Original post by Sachi K

It would be sensible to give it at least until Christmas. You can't start university elsewhere anyhow until next year. Try different clubs & societies, and hopefully you'll find nicer people and things will get better.

Reply 6

Sachi K

Original post by Crumpet1

I really hope so, and yeah, I'll give it till Christmas. Thank you so much!

Reply 7

thatsprettyrad

Damn that sucks, what uni do you go to? Is it in a city with good student life, if not maybe you’re better reapplying somewhere next year in a place and course more suited to you. Realistically if you don’t like the course and are unhappy there, you are unlikely to do well but it’s still early days. I’d say, wait it out for a couple months, on weekends go and visit your other friends who are “living it up” (when you have the time and funds to do so) and continue trying to socialise where possible, if you still hate it though maybe just drop out and reapply next year somewhere better suited to you :smile: