Why are older single women viewed in a negative way?

People seem to have a thing against single older women (say in their 30's, 40's maybe 50's) who dont have kids and dont wish to marry. They call them crazy, cat women and view their lives as sad yet with men they dont seem to. Even my dad said that he viewed this type of woman as a burden to society but if she stays in shape, is a decent person and has a job/career, supports herself how is this any different from a man who doesnt wish to marry..

Reply 1

Harold Saxon

16

Trust me, every woman I know above 30 without a man in their lives (or woman I'm not gonna discriminate) is miserable.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Harold Saxon

Trust me, every woman I know above 30 without a man in their lives (or woman I'm not gonna discriminate) is miserable.

I could say the same about men I know they seem to have low self esteem, appear sad and kind of accepted their single status but im not talking about peoples personal feelings, more the way society views them in a negative light.

Reply 3

Kseniya MilkCHoc

7

They are not weird and not crazy but most of them feel miserable maybe not always but surely sometimes they do as it is the law of nature that people should have family so this instinct (desire to have a partner and children e g family ) is irresistible

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Kseniya MilkCHoc

They are not weird and not crazy but most of them feel miserable maybe not always but surely sometimes they do as it is the law of nature that people should have family so this instinct (desire to have a partner and children e g family ) is irresistible

What about single older men then

Reply 5

Kseniya MilkCHoc

7

Really I can pity them but I have never judged them. On the contrary nowadays people are starting to postpone their personal life to 30 s concentrating on career and so on

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Kseniya MilkCHoc

Really I can pity them but I have never judged them. On the contrary nowadays people are starting to postpone their personal life to 30 s concentrating on career and so on

so why not pity single older men too

Reply 7

Kambu

7

Original post by Anonymous

so why not pity single older men too

I don't think it's as 'bad' for men to postpone their personal life as it is for women. Mainly because female fertility generally starts to decline when a woman is in her early 30s whereas male fertility generally starts to decline around age 40–45 years.

This could be why people may "pity" single middle aged women more than single men of the same age. :/

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Kambu

I don't think it's as 'bad' for men to postpone their personal life as it is for women. Mainly because female fertility generally starts to decline when a woman is in her early 30s whereas male fertility generally starts to decline around age 40–45 years.

This could be why people may "pity" single middle aged women more than single men of the same age. :/

Many women arnt bothered about having kids, some married women dont have kids do people pity these women too

Reply 9

bones-mccoy

19

Surely it's much better to not have kids than to have kids just so society doesn't judge you or to feel accepted etc? You shouldn't bring children into the world unless you do actually want them. Same with marriage, why would you force yourself to maintain a long-term relationship if it makes you miserable? We've just got to accept that not everyone's the same, and that although humans are sociable creatures, some of us are quite content in our own company. It's sad that women are judged so much more harshly for being middle aged and single compared with men.

Reply 10

fairangel

9

Why is it only women viewed for being single? What about the men?

Besides 30 isn't exactly old to be a single lady

Reply 11

TaintedLight

20

Original post by fairangel

Why is it only women viewed for being single? What about the men?

Besides 30 isn't exactly old to be a single lady

Statistically, a mother is more likely to give birth to a not-so-health kid post 30s than, say, a 25 year old

Reply 12

fairangel

9

Original post by TaintedLight

Statistically, a mother is more likely to give birth to a not-so-health kid post 30s than, say, a 25 year old

30-35 is healthy to have kids. Men's sperm gets lower when they reach a certain age.

Reply 13

mojojojo101

17

Because the socially accepted norm is that women exist almost solely to have and look after children.

A single women in her 40s or 50s is a subversion and/or rejection of that expectation and hence she must be vilified.