Keeping Calm and Cavying on at uni

01/11/17

What I'm grateful for today
my teddy bear he is comforting to hug when i cant sleep

A random act of kindness I've done
gave some really honest positive feedback to a guy in my tutorial cos his work was awesome

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
my friend from school has been really supportive of me and has been saying all the right non-judgemental things

Something I could improve on
getting to sleep, was so tired yesterday yet still couldn't sleep till 4:30am, tossed and turned all night. Then dreamed one of my pets was having a seizure and died and the other one was being hunted by sinn fein (wtf??? a level history stay deceased). Then some weird **** about docks and water and idk

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Got 98% on the work i gave in today the tutor kept me behind after and said they were really impressed, was the highest mark in my tutorial and just feel a bit proud

What I've done to look after my mental health
am seeing my newly appointed MH mentor on friday

Something I have to look forward to
eating my cheese sandwich and having a nap

98%????!! That's ****ing awesome! Well done Cavy!

Good luck with the MH mentor on Friday. Perhaps have a think if there's anything you particularly want to make sure to mention to him/her.

98% is incredible! Well done Cavy

01/11/17

What I'm grateful for today
my teddy bear he is comforting to hug when i cant sleep

A random act of kindness I've done
gave some really honest positive feedback to a guy in my tutorial cos his work was awesome

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
my friend from school has been really supportive of me and has been saying all the right non-judgemental things

Something I could improve on
getting to sleep, was so tired yesterday yet still couldn't sleep till 4:30am, tossed and turned all night. Then dreamed one of my pets was having a seizure and died and the other one was being hunted by sinn fein (wtf??? a level history stay deceased). Then some weird **** about docks and water and idk

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Got 98% on the work i gave in today the tutor kept me behind after and said they were really impressed, was the highest mark in my tutorial and just feel a bit proud

What I've done to look after my mental health
am seeing my newly appointed MH mentor on friday

Something I have to look forward to
eating my cheese sandwich and having a nap

Thank you saber
am just a bit worried that they wont want to help me because my work is on target and stuff but that's because im doing my work at the expense of stuff like eating and sleeping and cleaning myself and stuff cos i dont have enough mental energy to do all of those things will see what they say anyway

Thank you TLG, hope you are well today

01/11/17

What I'm grateful for today
my teddy bear he is comforting to hug when i cant sleep

A random act of kindness I've done
gave some really honest positive feedback to a guy in my tutorial cos his work was awesome

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
my friend from school has been really supportive of me and has been saying all the right non-judgemental things

Something I could improve on
getting to sleep, was so tired yesterday yet still couldn't sleep till 4:30am, tossed and turned all night. Then dreamed one of my pets was having a seizure and died and the other one was being hunted by sinn fein (wtf??? a level history stay deceased). Then some weird **** about docks and water and idk

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Got 98% on the work i gave in today the tutor kept me behind after and said they were really impressed, was the highest mark in my tutorial and just feel a bit proud

What I've done to look after my mental health
am seeing my newly appointed MH mentor on friday

Something I have to look forward to
eating my cheese sandwich and having a nap

98% is amazing.

I averaged high 2:1s/firsts for the most part at university (and graduated with a first when I was really ill) and my MH mentor was still amazing, so I have no doubt they'll want to help you as well. Grades don't equal amount of suffering/difficulty after all.

I am a great believer in the power of teddy bears. My eldest who is 21 and was diagnosed with clinical depression at the start of his 2nd year ( didn't tell us until he had to admit he wouldn't be graduating with everyone else cos his finals weren't until the end of August) still has his teddy for tough times. With a lot of support and bear hugging he sat his exams and got his dissertation in. He just missed a 2:1 but considering the state he was in at the end of 3rd year we are very proud. Now I am here cheering you on and sending you all the support I can. 98% is incredible, look what you are achieving. Enjoy that cheese sandwich and nap, you have earned it.

good on you for achieving that pathway and hopefully, just always had that perception even in school 'why are you stressed you get good marks' etc etc



congratulations to your son thank you for being so supportive of me on this thread


02/11/17

What I'm grateful for today
That i didnt have to wake up until 10am and that my lecture finished early, still have another one this afternoon but finishing early allowed me to go home

A random act of kindness I've done
dont know

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
my housemate hugged me (we get on like a house on fire, although hopefully not our house on fire) which is nice cos i needed a hug. A boy on the course asked me if i would like to sit with him and i like him so i said yes

Something I could improve on
sleeping again, had more nightmares. Other stuff too but not talking about it

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
being a swat in class, lecturer asked me if i understood what was going on in the break and i said yes cos i did it in a level history which is true. Don't normally like to blow my own trumpet like that but i feel like i need to impress this tutor somewhat as i only see them once a week and always look half dead and not interested even though i am interested

What I've done to look after my mental health
filled in this assessment form thing idk what it's called

Something I have to look forward to
the soldiers selling poppies, need to get my poppy. Love military history and love trying to spot all the regiments and ranks the soldiers are from when they come out to sell the poppies (ik some are cadets but still)

good on you for achieving that pathway and hopefully, just always had that perception even in school 'why are you stressed you get good marks' etc etc



congratulations to your son thank you for being so supportive of me on this thread


02/11/17

What I'm grateful for today
That i didnt have to wake up until 10am and that my lecture finished early, still have another one this afternoon but finishing early allowed me to go home

A random act of kindness I've done
dont know

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
my housemate hugged me (we get on like a house on fire, although hopefully not our house on fire) which is nice cos i needed a hug. A boy on the course asked me if i would like to sit with him and i like him so i said yes

Something I could improve on
sleeping again, had more nightmares. Other stuff too but not talking about it

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
being a swat in class, lecturer asked me if i understood what was going on in the break and i said yes cos i did it in a level history which is true. Don't normally like to blow my own trumpet like that but i feel like i need to impress this tutor somewhat as i only see them once a week and always look half dead and not interested even though i am interested

What I've done to look after my mental health
filled in this assessment form thing idk what it's called

Something I have to look forward to
the soldiers selling poppies, need to get my poppy. Love military history and love trying to spot all the regiments and ranks the soldiers are from when they come out to sell the poppies (ik some are cadets but still)

Sorry for not doing this for a while and not being overly talkative, just feel like absolute **** tbh, everything feels just really hard to do, idk whether to go back to the doctor but im seeing them in a week anyway. dont think that would achieve too much anyway as they seem to think im coping better than i am but then part of me thinks that if i say that they will think im just making excuses so i dont have to talk about the other stuff anymore and meh. In fact idk what anyone can really do because everyone seems to take 100 years to do anything 'keep an eye on your email', 'wait for the post'

30/10/17 (realised i have been writing 2018 for all of these.....

Something I could improve on
Everything, only ate cereal then ate a muffin and ruined it will eat pasta tonight because im aiming to only eat two things a day. Also not falling asleep when i'm meant to be doing work also working quicker and just functioning as a person in general

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Showered, tidied my room a little (still need to hoover it but ran out of mental energy) and cleaned my bin out. Have done loads of design drawings but it's still not enough, still need to do about 50 by wednesday

What I've done to look after my mental health
Nothing really, the more my MH has a go at me and makes me feel bad the less i want to look after it

hugs to @Matrix123, @Midnightmemories and @Pathway

03/11/17

What I'm grateful for today
That i have a 4 day weekend need it, have enough stuff to do

A random act of kindness I've done
have no idea, feel like the kindness i do is stuff i dont do. Today i just felt like being left alone and not talking to anyone but i made a lot of effort to interact with people

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
was working on my homework for wednesday's module in my break and my tutor for today (different one) came up to me and said the rendering on it was really good, given the fact that they are the one that teaches us rendering that made me pleased

Something I could improve on
Being nice. Feel like im not nice atm. Feel so angry and just irritated in general which isn't helpful. Can't sleep since i started the mental health pills. Gonna go out on a limb and say it's their fault since it only started happening like a week after i started them and i never used to have trouble falling asleep just with waking up in the night and having nightmares. Now i get in bed at like 1am and lie there staring into darkness until about 5am. Then have to wake up at 8am. Was just starting to fall asleep last night at 4 then my body like convulsed because i thought i was falling and was having one of those dream hallucination things so that jerked me awake 3 times.Then when i finally sleep i have great dreams of skinny wolf like creatures with weird eyes trying to rip my face off by the uni canal in the dark then crawling under the foundations of houses to get away from them, for instance.

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
kept up in the software lesson, i really dislike software because im not confident with it but managed to do it all

What I've done to look after my mental health
booked to see my head of pastoralness/tutor and seeing my mentor in a couple hours, dont know what that will be like

Something I have to look forward to
don't know am fed up

This is such a lovely idea! Need to do something like this, its good to stay mindful of all the little things that happen. I've been a bit pessimistic lately.
If you want check out my blog too (you can see how whiney ive been ahha

https://anonexeter.blogspot.co.uk/2017/11/chapter-11-dropping-out.html

(I'm a fresher at uni)

xoxox

Yeah, I mean obviously some people do get lower grades than expected because of health stuff (I did in GCSEs and A Levels), doesn't mean everyone will or that it'll always be like that. My best friend who died got an A in her English A Level despite being in hospital. Being able to do an exam and get a high grade doesn't mean you're not struggling. Don't let people mess with your head.

Remember, if you don't get on with your mentor you can ask for someone else too.

And thank you!

Sounds like lots to be proud of today. Must get my poppy too. Random act of kindness? - all the lovely things you say to your supporters on here each day. And by sitting next to the boy on your course you probably made him very happy. Pleased to hear you love military history, that is what my middle son is studying. Look forward each day to hearing how you are getting on.

I hope things have been improving, even if only by a small amount
Crying sometimes lets emotions out so from that point of view, maybe it's a good thing considering you don't normally cry too much? Here if you need to talk, as I'm sure you already know

Ofc you know what's best for you but I think it'll be healthier to eat at least 3 things... I know you're looking at saving money, but just make sure you're not undereating

Great achievements! Aww hopefully you managed to get lots of sketches done in time?

Dealing with MH is very hard but as long as you are doing something, then that's good It sounds like you've been getting on well with it though, based on your more recent posts

Well done on going to see your mentor, hope it goes well. Remember everyone feels angry and irritable if they are having trouble sleeping. Might be worth checking with GP whether your problems with sleep are a side effect of the medication as the GP might have an alternative. Still plenty of positive things in your post. Keep taking it day by day.

This is such a lovely idea! Need to do something like this, its good to stay mindful of all the little things that happen. I've been a bit pessimistic lately.
If you want check out my blog too (you can see how whiney ive been ahha

https://anonexeter.blogspot.co.uk/2017/11/chapter-11-dropping-out.html

(I'm a fresher at uni)

xoxox

Omg can't believe I'm just seeing this blog

Definitely subscribing.

Thank you for all these replies sorry for taking ages to get round to them just felt very tired of late and stuff thank you all for all your support i appreciate every word