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Feel like going to university was the worst decision I ever made

Genuinely, the worst. In my 30 years of life, I have never felt so isolated. In the almost three years I have been here I have made no friends what so ever, I tried joining societies and clubs and talking to whoever was on my course whenever I could, but the whole experience of university has made me incredibly depressed. I was looking forward to doing my end of year project; my dissertation, it was what was keeping me going. Getting to do something that I had an interest in and getting to talk to someone about it. But my supervisor has shown up at least 40 minutes late to every meeting we have scheduled and my two separate 30-minute slots have both become 5 minutes of unhelpful talking time. I don't know what I'm doing nor do I think I ever will. Honestly, if my supervisor said "look I have more important things to do and I dont have the time to help you" I would be okay with that, but he offers this help, has me coming in and then I end up waiting 50 minutes for him and then sees me for 5 minutes which is barely enough time for a good hello let alone actually raising questions that I have. I come home most days (every day actually) and feel this horrible feeling of not knowing if I even want to wake up in the mornings to do it all again. I know this is dramatic, but 2.5 years of solitude despite my efforts to make friends and now not even the faculty has time for me...university really has been the worst experience of my life and I've had some pretty bad experiences...I feel like I've spent almost three years complaining about how rubbish everything has been, and in small irregular doses I could handle it, I'd just crack on with it and get through it without complaining but this has just been so f-ing sustained.

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Original post by VirgoStrain

You need to complain about the fact that he turns up to meetings late. You’ve scheduled them, how does he think it’s acceptable to come in multiple times almost an hour late?

I agree with you although I am concerned that complaining about him will impact my dissertation mark seen as he is the one who will mark it. I know things aren't supposed to work like that but in the real world I'm aware that it could impact his objectivity. I have complained about something else before, I saw a student being verbally abused by a different lecturer on my course and I spoke out about it, lodging a formal complaint only to be told "that's how he (the lecturer) is" and the whole complaint was swept under the rug and I was effectively told to go away...still, maybe I should say something.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by VirgoStrain

Well it’s either you get help from him and improve your performance or risk the opposite and come out with poor results...your work is probably moderated externally so if you are under-marked then examiners will pick up on that. What kind of course are you doing?

Yeah you're probably right. I just have zero faith in this system because of stuff like that and my experience of university so far has led me to be rather negative about everything, although I'm aware of that issue and do try to combat it...it SOMETIMES works. I'm doing international relations so, part of the politics department and I'm an undergrad. They are externally moderated but I don't think all of them are, but again, yes I could complain and then have my dissertation externally marked.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by VirgoStrain

I would definitely request external marking if you’re worried about how you might be marked. Get that weight lifted off your shoulder. Then you can nag your teacher for help without fear of reprisal.

You've actually been really helpful, thank you for that.

Reply 4

SirMilkSheikh

You wasted three years of your life and got in to debt for it. What are your plans?

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Original post by SirMilkSheikh

You wasted three years of your life and got in to debt for it. What are your plans?

Teaching. I didn't waste my time in terms of I could have been doing something else to be a teacher. I had to go to University. I feel that you haven't quite understood this post mate.