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Should i decline my offer from Cambridge?

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Go to Cambridge
Only go to Edinburgh if you prefer the course not because of your girlfriend

Forget about the money

As relationships don’t tend to last
If you sacrificed Cambridge just for your girlfriend you will regret it

Lets assume that i want to go to Cambridge, how would i tell my girlfriend, she wasted a year for me and if i ditch her now, i will be massive c**t infront of her and my friends. If i break up with her now, the rest of my time i spent in Glasgow and my school will literally hell.

Also in any future relationship how can any girl trust me, if i was such a c**t to my previous girlfirend.

Reply 81

161BMW

Original post by scottsmith

Tbh it was stupid decision of u telling your gf to take a gap year and your gf to take a gap year for u.

Your gf when she starts uni next year with or without u will be fine. She has only taken a gap year and presumably has done some work or travel so has something to write on the CV.

Tbh you shouldn’t have promised to go to the same uni as her.

With future relationships don’t worry about that you be fine.

Reply 82

161BMW

In saying that I don’t think job opportunities wise there is a massive advantage going to Cambridge over Edinburgh but never the less. Edinburgh is a great respectable uni. However Cambridge supposed to have a better course I would think.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 83

username2391309

Original post by scottsmith

I been offered a place to study a 4 year Maths in Cambridge. However i just found out that the Masters i want to do you have to apply again after 3 years of the current course.

So i am planning on going to Edinburgh Uni, do my bachelors then apply for master's in Cambridge. Thereby saving more than £36,000. Is that a responsible choice.

If you are Scottish so your first degree is free. Then it is off course the best idea to go to Edinburgh University.

Reply 84

ebony_xx

Original post by scottsmith

personally i believe that you should not worry about the money but about what will make you happies, if that is going to canbridge then go there but if you want to go to edinburgh then you sould apply there. either school would be a great oppurtunity and you should do what make you happiest xx

Original post by scottsmith

With respect, if she has more than 2 brain cells she would understand and support your decision to study at Cambridge. It is literally a once in a lifetime opportunity.

If you promised her that if she gap yeared then you would join her, then that's a bit of a different story. You'd need to sit down and have a long chat with her, I'd imagine, but again she should understand. If she's the one, it shouldn't mean the end of your relationship at all.

All the best

Reply 87

stellamaris333

I almost had the same problem as you. I was actually dreading hearing from Oxford as had already decided after being down there for interviews that I didn't actually want to go there after all! I preferred to stay in Scotland. Fortunately, I didn't get accepted so the decision was made for me, which was wonderful. However, if I had got an offer, then I would have felt obligated to accept it, even though I knew I wouldn't have been so happy down there on my own. Everyone would have been pressurising me to accept it, because of the prestige and reputation etc. also the achievement to actually get in! Well done to you, by the way. I'm not sure I would have wanted to accept it though for me but only to pacify everyone else - and it would have meant an extra £40000 for tuition, so a lot of money not to enjoy my experience there. You need to do what's best for you. Where did you like best? Where did you feel you fit in the most? I knew for certain I wouldn't have fitted in at Oxford and maybe, that came across at interviews. I don't envy your decision. It's a difficult one to make.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 88

Rohan77642

Original post by 161BMW

Really?
I am no expert on this, but surely Cambridge for maths especially, must give a huge advantage over edinburgh for maths in terms of job oppurtunities.
I am not saying that the uni you go to is what decides your job oppurtunities, but surely maths at cambridge must have a big advantage over other universities. I mean if we were to compare a university like imperial or warwick with Cambridge for the job prospects after completing a maths degree, I still would be under the impression that Cambridge is still a big advantage. Compare that to Edinburgh, whose maths department is not at the same level as Warwick/imperial the gap seems quite big to me.

Reply 89

auburnstar

Original post by Rohan77642

Spoiler

Not according to this graph at least :wink:

(Degree subject, professional experience and specific skills are far more important)

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 90

Rohan77642

Original post by auburnstar

Not according to this graph at least :wink:

(Degree subject, professional experience and specific skills are far more important)

I stand corrected. Thank you

Reply 91

auburnstar

Original post by Rohan77642

I stand corrected. Thank you

No worries! :smile:

it's a common misconception and pretty understandable tbh

Reply 92

Someone123123

Original post by auburnstar

No worries! :smile:

it's a common misconception and pretty understandable tbh

Yes but all the other criteria are influenced by the university you graduated from

Reply 93

Parliament

Original post by scottsmith

Hey guys, thanks for all your advice. I am going to decline my offer from Cambridge, the main reason (even tho many people would think its stupid), is because i made the promise to the girl that we would go to Edinburgh together. If i go to Cambridge i am 100% sure i will have that guilty consciousness of betraying her for the rest of my life. Even if i don't get into Cambridge for the masters i will be happy knowing that i wasn't c**t and didnt hurt anyone.

I don't tend to be this blunt very often on TSR (I try to steer clear and be supportive), but imo this is a catastrophic mistake. In my (admittedly limited) experience, it's a poor idea to have one's life revolve around anything, whatever it may be. Usually on TSR you have people placing academia on a pedestal and subordinating the rest of their lives to getting that A* or that uni offer - it's rare that you see someone subordinating almost everything in their life (academia, future career prospects, future academic prospects, etc) to a relationship.

I caution against this in the same way I caution against any other type of total subordination, and for the same reasons: it constitutes a complete loss of perspective, and stakes everything on the one privileged element in your life (in your case, your girlfriend; in other cases, academia/work/job/hobby/etc). This means that: everything else suffers in order to benefit the privileged element; the privileged element is given too high a status in your life (which unbalances everything and prevents you from making clear decisions with fair perspective); and if - hopefully not, but let's be grown-ups here - something goes wrong to the privileged element, you're left up sh-t creek with nothing to show for it.

What you've done over the course of this thread is create a false dichotomy where your only options are 'Cambridge' and 'girlfriend'. These two things do not have to be mutually exclusive. Since you've spent some time here looking for exceptional people who've done their maths undergrad at Edinburgh and gone onto Part III at Cambridge (be in no doubt: this is the exception rather than the rule), allow me to do likewise and cite the - far, far more common - exceptions to the rule that 'uni kills all relationships'. This is untrue. Plenty of people maintain an intimate, long-distance relationship at uni no problem. The ones that fail are the ones that weren't meant to be; imo, this won't be a problem for you because you two clearly care about each other. My proposition would therefore be to, well, have both. Take Cambridge, and your relationship. It's possible, and a darn sight easier than this crazy notion of privileging the relationship over everything else, self-sabotaging an unbelievable academic/career opportunity, and then attempting to go to Cambridge for Part III in x years' time.

Just my two cents :smile:

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 94

161BMW

Original post by Rohan77642

Going to a decent uni gets you to a short list or an interview just like anyone who went to Cambridge, Oxford, Imperial, LSE, UCL etc. Then the rest depends on the person. This is my opinion.

Going to a fancy uni doesn’t dictate that person life will be a “success” and vice versa.

Reply 95

auburnstar

Original post by Someone123123

Yes but all the other criteria are influenced by the university you graduated from

That is true, but only to an extent. They are the product of hard work and in particular an environment that encourages hard work.

You could go to Edinburgh and work very hard and do very well in terms of getting a good job. In fact, it's entirely possible to not go to university at all and do well in terms of employment (politicians, business managers, jobs w/o these requirements etc).

If someone is dedicated enough to work hard and put in the effort, there's no reason to think where they graduated should hold them back (and we are talking about Edinburgh, not a "lower" ranking uni), especially when it's not the top priority for most employers.

But employment prospects are also the wrong reason to choose one uni over the other anyway - the right reason is whether the course is 'right for you'. There is an influencing factor for sure, I definitely agree, but these traits can be developed independently or at other unis (in particular, the work experience element which is the product of previous employment (something which usually happens on a serious level after university)).

Reply 96

claudiorafael

If I was in your shoes I’d go to Cambridge and wouldn’t give it a minutes thought.. you are giving up on an unique opportunity

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 97

Someone123123

I hope the following reply doesn't come across as harsh, it's not my intention.

Original post by auburnstar

That is true, but only to an extent. They are the product of hard work and in particular an environment that encourages hard work.

I.e. Cambridge in this instance. That is irrefutable.

You could go to Edinburgh and work very hard and do very well in terms of getting a good job.

Possible, but OP has a better chance of doing that at Cambridge, which is in his hands. Why throw it away?

In fact, it's entirely possible to not go to university at all and do well in terms of employment (politicians, business managers, jobs w/o these requirements etc).

The exception rather than the rule.

If someone is dedicated enough to work hard and put in the effort, there's no reason to think where they graduated should hold them back (and we are talking about Edinburgh, not a "lower" ranking uni), especially when it's not the top priority for most employers.

Yes, but as above, he has a better option on his hands.

But employment prospects are also the wrong reason to choose one uni over the other anyway - the right reason is whether the course is 'right for you'.

With respect, I think this is naive. At the end of the day OP will be competing in the job market. What does 'right for you' mean anyway? Fairy talk.

There is an influencing factor for sure, I definitely agree, but these traits can be developed independently or at other unis (in particular

Yes, but it's harder. Why choose the harder route?

Again, I don't mean to sound harsh over this post. :smile:

Reply 98

Doones

Original post by Someone123123

I hope the following reply doesn't come across as harsh, it's not my intention.

I.e. Cambridge in this instance. That is irrefutable.

Possible, but OP has a better chance of doing that at Cambridge, which is in his hands. Why throw it away?

The exception rather than the rule.

Yes, but as above, he has a better option on his hands.

With respect, I think this is naive. At the end of the day OP will be competing in the job market. What does 'right for you' mean anyway? Fairy talk.

Yes, but it's harder. Why choose the harder route?

Again, I don't mean to sound harsh over this post. :smile:

There will be no routes closed (or made in any way less accessible) by choosing to do Maths at Edinburgh instead of Cambridge. Except the route of ultimately going for Part III/MASt but that's an academic target, not an employability issue.

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