Scared of driving

Ok, pretty obvious from the title but I'll give some details of my background in driving.

I passed my test first time with 9 minors aged 19. My parents wanted me to get it out of the way before uni which made sense. However, due to not having the funds and saving for uni I didn't get a car for a while. Then in my first year at uni (aged 21) my parents bought me a car. This was around Christmas time and I couldn't take it to uni so I drove it in the holidays. However, apart from a couple trips to the supermarket and picking my mum up from work, I didn't drive on any unfamiliar roads and it was only when I really had to drive. Plus I didn't like having anyone else in the car because I felt embarrassed. After the summer 2015 I gave the car up as I wasn't really driving it and it had a few problems anyway. To be honest I was relieved.

In my second year at uni I got a work placement which meant a car would be useful. I had to take a friend on my first journey there to help me make decisions about the road. I remember having to pull over for an ambulance and I just freaked and let him do it. I made that journey once more by myself and hated it, nearly hit the car in front of me so from then on I got the train. I didn't drive that car so much that the battery ran dead and we eventually sold that too.

That was the last time I drove and I'm now 24. I've finished uni and not having a car is hampering my ability to get a job. If I can't get a bus, I can't have the job. My dream job has come up and I want to go for it but it requires driving. I am so embarrassed to ask about the driving aspect because I feel stupid about being scared of the roads. Other people just hop in the car and think nothing of it!

In feel like I don't have the decision making capacity, or the spatial awareness that is required to drive. I have literally cried at the wheel before because I am just that pathetic.

Anyone else felt like this? or overcome it?

Lack of confidence is something many new drivers have, and the best thing to combat it is to drive more often. You also need to practise on unfamiliar roads, as new routes/unexpected detours/diversions is a huge part of everyday driving. It might not seem appealing if you're already in the mindset that driving is horrendous, but as you have acknowledged that it will affect your future job prospects, it is surely worth pushing yourself.

Book some refresher lessons with a driving instructor, to boost your confidence and they will be able to identify which areas make you panic and what you can do to reduce the anxiety about these situations.

Can I ask why you took your friend with you to help you 'to make decisions about the road'? This is a bit concerning because if you passed your test, you must have demonstrated that you can make decisions independently i.e. when to pull out of a junction safely, how to drive on roundabouts correctly etc. Typical drivers don't need to rehearse a route to this extent past simply timing it/judging traffic levels. What makes you think you don't have the decision-making capacity or spatial awareness when you must have shown these skills to pass your test?