The Student Room Group

Can't get over a guy I went on a few dates with

Basically a few weeks ago I met a guy on Tinder and after a week of speaking to each other we met up for a date. It went really well, we talked for hours and he was such a nice guy. We then went on a second date only a few days later, and basically long story short he then messaged me a few days after that to tell me that he can't give me what I want because we want different kinds of relationships and that he needs to deal with his problems first before getting involved with someone.

I really liked him, and although we only went on 2 dates, I can't stop thinking about how things could have been. I have a tiny shred of hope that eventually he'll want to meet up again but this is quite irrational.

How do I get over him?
focus on yourself
Find someone else on tinder to hookup with?
Reply 3
Original post by 8472
Find someone else on tinder to hookup with?


Yeah the thing is now I find it really tedious to spend hours talking to a lot of boring guys just to find 1 or 2 that I'd actually meet up with.
Yeah, focus on yourself, there really isn't an answer or how to, to get over someone. It was only two dates and maybe you became infatuated with him but it'll pass and you'll forget all about him. Distract yourself and go out and have fun and eventually you'll get over him. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah the thing is now I find it really tedious to spend hours talking to a lot of boring guys just to find 1 or 2 that I'd actually meet up with.

On one hand you're stuck up about getting in a relationship you're heartbroken a guy basically said no but on the other hand you don't want to put effort into it?.. Do you want a relationship for the sake of relationship or are you looking for a life partner?
Reply 6
Original post by 8472
On one hand you're stuck up about getting in a relationship you're heartbroken a guy basically said no but on the other hand you don't want to put effort into it?.. Do you want a relationship for the sake of relationship or are you looking for a life partner?


I wouldn't say that's a fair comparison to make. Of course I'm willing to put effort into people I find interesting (and I am talking to a few people), but why would I spend time talking to 20 random guys whose ultimate goals are probably to have sex? I'm only 18, so yeah maybe I'm just looking to get into a relationship for the sake of it but at the same time I'm not just looking for hookups.
Original post by Anonymous
I wouldn't say that's a fair comparison to make. Of course I'm willing to put effort into people I find interesting (and I am talking to a few people), but why would I spend time talking to 20 random guys whose ultimate goals are probably to have sex? I'm only 18, so yeah maybe I'm just looking to get into a relationship for the sake of it but at the same time I'm not just looking for hookups.

Then perhaps tinder isn't the right method for finding guys. Most are on the for hookups not a long term relationship.

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