I'm going to approach this girl tomorrow at the bus stop, need some opinions/options.
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Original post by cykam812
Is it a wise to shake hands when introducing?
Some men shake my hand and others don't. It's just being polite but you don't really need to but it's your choice
Walk up to her before the bus arrives and have this little chat,
When’s it due?
I’m not pregnant
I meant the bus you fat ****.
Yes I fully expect this comment to be deleted.
When’s it due?
I’m not pregnant
I meant the bus you fat ****.
Yes I fully expect this comment to be deleted.
Original post by loveleest
Do it! The worst thing she will say is no and it will be a great learning experience. Confidence is so attractive
LOL, you would never approach or ask out any men first so that's a bit rich coming from you
Pot calling the Kettle black me thinks
Original post by Anonymous
LOL, you would never approach or ask out any men first so that's a bit rich coming from you
Pot calling the Kettle black me thinks
Pot calling the Kettle black me thinks
You anons are so weird....
Are you seriously pissed because i find confidence attractive?
Original post by cykam812
Thanks for the comments guys, although some of them have kinda put me off doing this now lol.
That's the thing, I can easily catch her while shes waiting for the bus as we both wait at the same place for it to arrive, but there is usually a lot of people around and i don't want to make a fool of myself with an audience watching, But i guess it is more creepy doing it after we get off the bus and walk home. Surprisingly that line is very similar to a line i was going to use as i heard good things about people using it. "Quick question, If you found someone attractive at *PLACE*, how would you approach them?" and then like you said walk around the corner and use whatever she said.
That's the thing, I can easily catch her while shes waiting for the bus as we both wait at the same place for it to arrive, but there is usually a lot of people around and i don't want to make a fool of myself with an audience watching, But i guess it is more creepy doing it after we get off the bus and walk home. Surprisingly that line is very similar to a line i was going to use as i heard good things about people using it. "Quick question, If you found someone attractive at *PLACE*, how would you approach them?" and then like you said walk around the corner and use whatever she said.
EG "My older brother wants to buy an unusual, cool, kick arse pet. What would you suggest?"
They'll probably suggest something lame like a dog. To which you reply "Oh! He was thinking of something along the lines of a peacock."
Then turn to the girl and say "What do you think would be better for him a (whatever the person suggested) or a peacock?"
She'll probably give a short answer To which you would ask "What would you suggest as an alternative to a ... or a peacock?"
Then you could go on to mention that you can sell the tail feathers when they drop off, and how they make a lot of noise, which is a good thing as your brother hates his neighbours. And how your brother's already shown you a website where you can buy peacocks online.
Original post by cykam812
Is it a wise to shake hands when introducing?
Don't forget to throw your cloak down over any puddles that she has to pass over as she steps off the bus.
Original post by cykam812
UPDATE 2: The day after, i ****ing did it. I used Judge Jules advice on approaching her as she did look familiar and it turns out we did go to the same junior school, unfortunately though she seemed eager to go home and by that i mean slight movements to the road she takes which i don't. I might have misinterpreted it but i wasn't sure and was fairly nervous so i left it at that without giving my number or anything, I guess we'll see if she picks it back up next week if not i'll get over it. BUT thank you to everyone that left comments i really appreciate it, it really did help and its a big weight off my shoulders having done this whether it was successful or not so im grateful for that, ill update what happens next week.
UPDATE 2: The day after, i ****ing did it. I used Judge Jules advice on approaching her as she did look familiar and it turns out we did go to the same junior school, unfortunately though she seemed eager to go home and by that i mean slight movements to the road she takes which i don't. I might have misinterpreted it but i wasn't sure and was fairly nervous so i left it at that without giving my number or anything, I guess we'll see if she picks it back up next week if not i'll get over it. BUT thank you to everyone that left comments i really appreciate it, it really did help and its a big weight off my shoulders having done this whether it was successful or not so im grateful for that, ill update what happens next week.
At this point she's either a "No" girl or a "maybe" girl.
Be prepared to play the long game if you hope to get her...........
Original post by cykam812
Updated, @everyone thank you again.
I didn't see any update, It was only because ANM775 replied to you that I saw it.
Anyway good job. It's better than doing nothing as you would always regret not trying but an even worse regret would be if you didn't try to speak to her and heard some other bloke had asked her out in exactly the same way. Now all you have to do is follow it through next time by asking for her number and if she doesn't want to give it give her yours. Maybe have your number already written down so your prepared that way if she said no a few days, weeks, months later she might change her mind and ring you.
Because I've done that so many times in the past where men have asked me out on the street and I said no then a few hours later or the next day I totally regretted it and was kicking myself for months, years afterwards wishing I had given my number or at least taken theirs.
Many Years ago a bloke I went on a date with told me a story about a woman he met on the street and she turned him down because she had a boyfriend but she took his number anyway then 6 months later she rang him up because she had split up with her boyfriend so even though he had to wait a long time for the call he would never have met her again if she had not taken his number. And it was a good idea because at least she was decent enough not to cheat on her boyfriend and she waited until she split up with him before ringing the new bloke.
But I kept making the same mistakes where I was sure I was not attracted to someone so did not take their number or give mine then I'd regret it later on everytime.
Many years ago a man asked me out and I had not even been on a first date with him yet then a few days later an even better looking man who was a ticket inspector at a train station asked me out but I said no but I didn't explain to him it's because someone else had asked me out because I don't believe in cheating but a week later I got dumped where the bloke just stopped ringing and never actually bothered to tell me so I've always regretted not giving the train guy my number or taking his number and doing what that other woman did where she waited until she had split up with her partner before ringing the new bloke.
So next time you see that girl you have to just ask her on a date and get the number or give yours or sometimes it's best to do both.
Or sometimes when I say no to going on a date men will say we can just be friends then. As sometimes when you become friends the girl might want more than that afterwards.
Some men don't ask by saying can I have your number ? but instead just say let me take your number.
It's a good trick because sometimes if they said can I have your number I find it easier to say no but when they didn't beg and said it the other way I just gave it. I don't know why that worked but it just did.
Original post by cykam812
Updated, @everyone thank you again.
Another thing I forgot to mention is that I hate it when men approach me just talk to then say bye without telling me what they actually wanted which is a date because I'm not going to embarrass myself by asking them out just incase they really did just approach just for a chat and not a date.
And it makes me nervous if a bloke just chats to me but doesn't say why he came over.
Maybe it was the same for that girl so she's not going to know what you want until you tell her and she's not going to embarrass herself by asking you out so she walked off.
I used to always think if a bloke asks a girl to go for a coffee with them that they were cheap and wouldn't make any effort so I would say no as I don't think that's an exciting date but now I don't think that anymore. But I do think it's easier just to approach anybody and say would you like to go for a coffee. Or can I take you for a coffee.
It's less embarrassing to ask that but when they give you the number then you have to tell them on the phone that it's a date so they are not confused as I have seen on TV where a man asked his work colleague if she'd like to go for coffee with him after work but he took her to a restaurant and ordered a bottle of wine so she was shocked as she didn't know it was a date until he ordered the wine.
She thought she was really just going out for coffee with him just as a friend because he didn't say it was a date. So it didn't go very well and she told him straight she's not interested in him in that way so he was embarrassed that he didn't make it clear to her before.
It was on a reality TV show called Vanderpump Rules. It was hillarious but the whole show is funny to watch these people messing up when they go on dates and in their relationships.
Choreograph a dance for her. Base it on the parrots mating ritual. 10% of the time it works 100% of the time. Hope this helps.
Original post by Judge Jules
I didn't see any update, It was only because ANM775 replied to you that I saw it.
Anyway good job. It's better than doing nothing as you would always regret not trying but an even worse regret would be if you didn't try to speak to her and heard some other bloke had asked her out in exactly the same way. Now all you have to do is follow it through next time by asking for her number and if she doesn't want to give it give her yours. Maybe have your number already written down so your prepared that way if she said no a few days, weeks, months later she might change her mind and ring you.
Because I've done that so many times in the past where men have asked me out on the street and I said no then a few hours later or the next day I totally regretted it and was kicking myself for months, years afterwards wishing I had given my number or at least taken theirs.
Many Years ago a bloke I went on a date with told me a story about a woman he met on the street and she turned him down because she had a boyfriend but she took his number anyway then 6 months later she rang him up because she had split up with her boyfriend so even though he had to wait a long time for the call he would never have met her again if she had not taken his number. And it was a good idea because at least she was decent enough not to cheat on her boyfriend and she waited until she split up with him before ringing the new bloke.
But I kept making the same mistakes where I was sure I was not attracted to someone so did not take their number or give mine then I'd regret it later on everytime.
Many years ago a man asked me out and I had not even been on a first date with him yet then a few days later an even better looking man who was a ticket inspector at a train station asked me out but I said no but I didn't explain to him it's because someone else had asked me out because I don't believe in cheating but a week later I got dumped where the bloke just stopped ringing and never actually bothered to tell me so I've always regretted not giving the train guy my number or taking his number and doing what that other woman did where she waited until she had split up with her partner before ringing the new bloke.
So next time you see that girl you have to just ask her on a date and get the number or give yours or sometimes it's best to do both.
Or sometimes when I say no to going on a date men will say we can just be friends then. As sometimes when you become friends the girl might want more than that afterwards.
Some men don't ask by saying can I have your number ? but instead just say let me take your number.
It's a good trick because sometimes if they said can I have your number I find it easier to say no but when they didn't beg and said it the other way I just gave it. I don't know why that worked but it just did.
Anyway good job. It's better than doing nothing as you would always regret not trying but an even worse regret would be if you didn't try to speak to her and heard some other bloke had asked her out in exactly the same way. Now all you have to do is follow it through next time by asking for her number and if she doesn't want to give it give her yours. Maybe have your number already written down so your prepared that way if she said no a few days, weeks, months later she might change her mind and ring you.
Because I've done that so many times in the past where men have asked me out on the street and I said no then a few hours later or the next day I totally regretted it and was kicking myself for months, years afterwards wishing I had given my number or at least taken theirs.
Many Years ago a bloke I went on a date with told me a story about a woman he met on the street and she turned him down because she had a boyfriend but she took his number anyway then 6 months later she rang him up because she had split up with her boyfriend so even though he had to wait a long time for the call he would never have met her again if she had not taken his number. And it was a good idea because at least she was decent enough not to cheat on her boyfriend and she waited until she split up with him before ringing the new bloke.
But I kept making the same mistakes where I was sure I was not attracted to someone so did not take their number or give mine then I'd regret it later on everytime.
Many years ago a man asked me out and I had not even been on a first date with him yet then a few days later an even better looking man who was a ticket inspector at a train station asked me out but I said no but I didn't explain to him it's because someone else had asked me out because I don't believe in cheating but a week later I got dumped where the bloke just stopped ringing and never actually bothered to tell me so I've always regretted not giving the train guy my number or taking his number and doing what that other woman did where she waited until she had split up with her partner before ringing the new bloke.
So next time you see that girl you have to just ask her on a date and get the number or give yours or sometimes it's best to do both.
Or sometimes when I say no to going on a date men will say we can just be friends then. As sometimes when you become friends the girl might want more than that afterwards.
Some men don't ask by saying can I have your number ? but instead just say let me take your number.
It's a good trick because sometimes if they said can I have your number I find it easier to say no but when they didn't beg and said it the other way I just gave it. I don't know why that worked but it just did.
Holy **** these posts are great and the stories were more than enjoyable to read! Before reading your two posts i was almost certain to myself that i wasn't going to approach her again, but after reading them i decided making another move would most likely be the best option, as stated in your post i don't think i showed my true intentions and it could be misleading if anything was to happen although i'm in doubt. Anyway i think i'll approach her straight away at the bus stop when i see her this week and take her number, if not give her my number using the advice you said. Although i think i might skip upon asking her out on a date straight there and ring her on one of the following nights if i was to get it, I have a couple of questions though.
1. Should i talk to her straight away i see whether its waiting at the bus stop or after we get of the bus?
2. If i do manage to take her number, should i also give her mine?
3. After taking her number should i leave her be?
4. More of a in general question, but what else would be a plus for me to do apart from the advice, small things if any.
Original post by cat_mac
Can anyone else not see update 3? 
It's blank, just there as a reminder for when i update later this week hopefully.
Original post by cykam812
Holy **** these posts are great and the stories were more than enjoyable to read! Before reading your two posts i was almost certain to myself that i wasn't going to approach her again, but after reading them i decided making another move would most likely be the best option, as stated in your post i don't think i showed my true intentions and it could be misleading if anything was to happen although i'm in doubt. Anyway i think i'll approach her straight away at the bus stop when i see her this week and take her number, if not give her my number using the advice you said. Although i think i might skip upon asking her out on a date straight there and ring her on one of the following nights if i was to get it, I have a couple of questions though.
1. Should i talk to her straight away i see whether its waiting at the bus stop or after we get of the bus?
2. If i do manage to take her number, should i also give her mine?
3. After taking her number should i leave her be?
4. More of a in general question, but what else would be a plus for me to do apart from the advice, small things if any.
1. Should i talk to her straight away i see whether its waiting at the bus stop or after we get of the bus?
2. If i do manage to take her number, should i also give her mine?
3. After taking her number should i leave her be?
4. More of a in general question, but what else would be a plus for me to do apart from the advice, small things if any.
I had typed quite a few things which was another story about a man who asked me out on the street and i went on a date with him then the page just switched off so everything I wrote dissappeard so it's too annoying for me for me to try to do it all again so I'll have try to write lots of shorter posts incase that happens again.
1. Talk to her straight away and ask her for number instead of waiting til she gets off because something could happen where someone she knows gets on halfway through the journey then you won't be able to ask. (last year while waiting at a bus stop a bloke said I look familiar and asked if I lived in the area then he asked for my number before the bus came but i did say no because he was too young, although age isn't important and if I did really fancy him I would've said yes)
2) If she gives her number always give yours too
3) sit next to her on the bus
4) I have to think more about not but ask about what her favourite band is, favourite film, favourite food as you might have those things in common
I wasn't expecting these questions so I'm not really sure so i'll call on @ANM775 to help you in what he's done before and you can use all those or anything he says or both advice
Original post by cykam812
Holy **** these posts are great and the stories were more than enjoyable to read! Before reading your two posts i was almost certain to myself that i wasn't going to approach her again, but after reading them i decided making another move would most likely be the best option, as stated in your post i don't think i showed my true intentions and it could be misleading if anything was to happen although i'm in doubt. Anyway i think i'll approach her straight away at the bus stop when i see her this week and take her number, if not give her my number using the advice you said. Although i think i might skip upon asking her out on a date straight there and ring her on one of the following nights if i was to get it, I have a couple of questions though.
1. Should i talk to her straight away i see whether its waiting at the bus stop or after we get of the bus?
2. If i do manage to take her number, should i also give her mine?
3. After taking her number should i leave her be?
4. More of a in general question, but what else would be a plus for me to do apart from the advice, small things if any.
1. Should i talk to her straight away i see whether its waiting at the bus stop or after we get of the bus?
2. If i do manage to take her number, should i also give her mine?
3. After taking her number should i leave her be?
4. More of a in general question, but what else would be a plus for me to do apart from the advice, small things if any.
On question 4 I meant I'm not sure what to write for no4 but that autocorrect changed it to not.
Most men think they should only take advice from other men and not women but what they don't realise is that some of the advice I give is what men have used on me that worked. And anything that didn't work on me will or has worked on some other women because every woman is different and will react in different ways.
Original post by Judge Jules
I had typed quite a few things which was another story about a man who asked me out on the street and i went on a date with him then the page just switched off so everything I wrote dissappeard so it's too annoying for me for me to try to do it all again so I'll have try to write lots of shorter posts incase that happens again.
1. Talk to her straight away and ask her for number instead of waiting til she gets off because something could happen where someone she knows gets on halfway through the journey then you won't be able to ask. (last year while waiting at a bus stop a bloke said I look familiar and asked if I lived in the area then he asked for my number before the bus came but i did say no because he was too young, although age isn't important and if I did really fancy him I would've said yes)
2) If she gives her number always give yours too
3) sit next to her on the bus
4) I have to think more about not but ask about what her favourite band is, favourite film, favourite food as you might have those things in common
I wasn't expecting these questions so I'm not really sure so i'll call on @ANM775 to help you in what he's done before and you can use all those or anything he says or both advice
1. Talk to her straight away and ask her for number instead of waiting til she gets off because something could happen where someone she knows gets on halfway through the journey then you won't be able to ask. (last year while waiting at a bus stop a bloke said I look familiar and asked if I lived in the area then he asked for my number before the bus came but i did say no because he was too young, although age isn't important and if I did really fancy him I would've said yes)
2) If she gives her number always give yours too
3) sit next to her on the bus
4) I have to think more about not but ask about what her favourite band is, favourite film, favourite food as you might have those things in common
I wasn't expecting these questions so I'm not really sure so i'll call on @ANM775 to help you in what he's done before and you can use all those or anything he says or both advice
I actually don't think he should go steaming in there and asking for numbers.
I don't don't it anymore [mainly because it's low probability] but I have approached quite a few women in public. Although being direct and revealing your hand straight away is quicker and tbh less anxiety on the part of the guy [as sometimes when you start of being indirect you end up chickening out of transitioning to direct] ...it is more effective to chat to her a bit first and not appear like getting her number/going on a date was your primary intention to talk to her.
A significant amount of girls will class guys overtly approaching them on the street as players/f**kboys/upto no good. It is not all that socially acceptable in this country to just walk upto a girl in public and start hitting on her.
The girl doesn't know OP, for all she knows he could be a f**kboy cruising for his latest victim.
success is at least getting a kiss [at some point].
phone number is not success. I know guys with phone books full of phone numbers and that's all.
the less well a girl knows you the lower your probability for success
the less socially acceptable your approach is the lower probability of success.
If I [a stranger] asked you to borrow a fiver how likely would you be to lend me it?
If your friend at school/work asked you for a fiver would you be more or less likely to lend it to him than me?
why?
same thing goes for hitting on women..............
Imo OP should speak to the girl for a combined total of at least 20 minutes first before making a proper move [trying to set up date/asking for phone number] ...and tbh you shouldn't even be asking for phone numbers, all the young people these days are asking for snapchats and stuff, and girls are less protective over their snapchats than phone numbers so i can see why this is happening.
really OP should be using the chance that he see's her every day to get to know her better thus improving his chances of success.
From what he mentioned the first time he spoke to her she was either a no girl or a maybe girl. A maybe girl might give out her number sometimes ...but she will rarely turn up on dates. Unless this girl is showing signs of being a yes girl do not ask her out on a date. For the most part only yes girls show up on dates....
A girl with options isn't going to spend 2 hours getting ready, and come out in the blistering cold to meet some random guy for a date she spoke to for 2 minutes who she's only half sure about .....and that's the god damn truth...
His best bet would be to stagger out his approach, talking to her a bit each day [whilst dropping hints] and then hopes she comes round [she starts showing signs of being a yes girl]
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