Trying to get over him but can’t :(

So I was seeing this guy since December. We’re both 17 and I see him everyday at school. We literally chatted everyday and he was a big part of my life. For the first time in about a year I felt happy like all the time. I really liked him and he liked me back which isn’t something that happens for me much. I’m a quiet girl who doesn’t attract guys attention like ever. So this was special to me and I really liked him. He was the one that was leading the relationship and he was the one who told me how much he liked me and wanted to be with me all the time. About a week ago he was very busy and so we literally didn’t chat for a whole week. Since chatting again he was very distant and after 4 days of him being distant he’s effectively broken up with me :frown:

. He’s such a kind guy and he did it very sweetly with a basic explanation that he needs to sort him self out and can’t be dealing with a relationship with me. He said he wants to be close close friends still but that’s all. It stings so much like my heart is broken. I don’t understand how someone can just go from being so affectionate to calling it off. I’ve cried and cried and cried. I can’t hate him cause he’s been so nice about this but it’s also just so unfair why it doesn’t matter that I wanted to stay together :frown:

it just hurts so much and I can’t stop thinking about him ALL THE TIME. I want to feel happy but I just have him in my head all the time and feel like crying. I’m also feeling like slightly obsessive cause I’m constantly wondering whether he’s chatting to other girls, or hanging out with others and I shouldn’t be jealous cause we’re not together and he can do what he wants but I just feel so distressed about it all :frown:

please how can I get him off my mind, how can I just feel happy again? X

Reply 1

JIRAIYA-ERO-SENNIN

Simple answer: you're 17 you'll get over him pretty quickly actually...

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Ugh this is the worst like if you're gonna reject or break up with someone, at least be mean to make it easy to hate them. Otherwise its just so hard to move on, maybe arrange something with him like go out somewhere and do something? That way you’ll know he still cares and he’s still there, so in other words just get used to the type of friendship he wants. I often find after a breakup or rejection, asking her to a coffee fixes everything - either we have a good time and I know we can still talk or I get a fat rejection and know where I stand (luckily this hasnt happened… yet!)

It’s just awkward for you because you broke up but because he was so nice about it, you cant really process it… so you can either take away the blur of kindness or you can make use of his kindness and keep him as a good friend.

Reply 3

Libbymay

Original post by Anonymous

Thank you x yeah exactly I just wish I could hate him but he’s too kind which is annoying.

I’d like to stay friends cause he’s a lovely lovely guy but it’s so hard when I still have romantic feelings towards him but he doesn’t to me.

I’m hoping time will make them go away but idk

Reply 4

Libbymay

Original post by JIRAIYA-ERO-SENNIN

Simple answer: you're 17 you'll get over him pretty quickly actually...

Yeah I guess it hurts badly right now but yeah hopefully soon it’ll feel much better :frown:

Reply 5

Fasih123

LOL when I was 17 I had a crush too and it took few months to get over her

Reply 6

JIRAIYA-ERO-SENNIN

Original post by Libbymay

Yeah I guess it hurts badly right now but yeah hopefully soon it’ll feel much better :frown:

It hurts now but you'll laugh or at least smile about it in the future. Unrequited love happens to just about everybody, it can be embarrassing, wounding, and saddening but so long as you can keep your mind on other things or meet other people and aren't emotionally unstable, it'll be fine