Boyfriend wants to break up?

My boyfriend and I have had some issues lately, been a arguing a lot etc, now he's said for a few weeks he's unhappy, when I ask what I can do to make him happy, he says he doesn't know.
I thought he was happy (when we're not arguing) so this caught me off guard, today he said "I don't want to break up because I'm worried that I'll regret it".
What the hell am I meant to do/say?
I've told him I'll give him space and in around a week or so to try and figure out and let me know what he wants as opposed to rush him for an answer right now.
But this is killing me! He says something is desperately holding him back from breaking up, I feel for him but I'm hurting too ☹️
When I asked if he loved me he said if he did he probably wouldn't feel like this, however he said he's unsure because something is holding him back. I feel like he hates me and I love him so it's horrible!

What shall I do? Also, if come next week, he states he wants to be with me, can I be with someone like this?

Reply 1

bubbleygum

8

Oh honey☹️ how long have you been together? I was with my first boyfriend for over a year and thought he was “the one”. I used to be crying alllll the time and felt like **** because of him...but I still loved him. Now I’m with someone who treats me well, and I no longer worry about being left.

Does he treat you well? Even if he does, does he make you upset without him knowing? Sometimes people just aren’t meant to be. I’m so sorry that this has happened...I had this exact situation happen with me in my first relationship that I mentioned.

When me and him broke up it felt like my world was gone, but I promise you that there is always someone who will suit you better.

Only you know if he’s worth your time. If he’s unsure, why should you give him the control to break up with you? How is it fair that you should sit and wait for his decision. I’m sorry but he should know if he loves you.

All the best... if you need more help please ask

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

There’s a few ways that you can deal with this, you can either break up with him first or you can continue on this path. I hate to say it but if it’s getting to the point that you need breaks from each other chances are it’s not going to work out. What’s been causing these arguments? if you don’t mind me asking.
It can be hard when a relationship starts to breakdown, especially when it’s someone that you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with but you need to remember that you are young and there’s so much more that life has to offer you than a silly boy who doesn’t know what he wants.

Please just don’t wait around for him to decide what you’re doing, have a deep chat with yourself, make a pros and cons list for reasons to continue the relationship and the reasons that you love him and ask yourself if it’s really worth all this tears, stress and heartache.

Stay strong! x

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

I’ve seen all the posts you’ve put on here and you need to end this. It’s an incredibly toxic relationship, you two can’t communicate with each other at all and you’re both just stringing each other along at thus point. I know it’s scary to leave someone, especially someone you love but he’s no good for you and you’re no good for him. If he’s making you feel like a nuisance then his mind is probably somewhere else. With a situation like this you two are going to become more toxic with each other and it’s going to end in cheating. Stop it now before it gets worse.

Is he staying over? how often are you seeing each other?

Reply 4

denny1997

6

Seems like he’s trying to get U to end it because he’s too much of a P u s s y to do it himself.

Reply 5

20emma20

OP

4

Original post by Anonymous

There’s a few ways that you can deal with this, you can either break up with him first or you can continue on this path. I hate to say it but if it’s getting to the point that you need breaks from each other chances are it’s not going to work out. What’s been causing these arguments? if you don’t mind me asking.
It can be hard when a relationship starts to breakdown, especially when it’s someone that you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with but you need to remember that you are young and there’s so much more that life has to offer you than a silly boy who doesn’t know what he wants.

Please just don’t wait around for him to decide what you’re doing, have a deep chat with yourself, make a pros and cons list for reasons to continue the relationship and the reasons that you love him and ask yourself if it’s really worth all this tears, stress and heartache.

Stay strong! x

Thanks! They're not big arguments, little bickers, like over what to watch on the tv etc, if I call him selfish (This is the most recent one I can remember) it's ridiculous, I can handle things like this easy, however he can't. If we have a slight disagreement he makes out its the end of the world and end of relationship.

He's not a bad person, he has told me he doesn't want me to wait around thinking about this all, I told him I will go on with my life and try not to think too much. In my head we have broke up anyway.

I was happy before this however a few weeks prior I was complaining about being unhappy as we didn't see eachother a lot of he didn't show me much effection, but I learned to be happy, so I blame myself for telling him he made me unhappy all those times ☹️

Reply 6

20emma20

OP

4

Original post by bubbleygum

Oh honey☹️ how long have you been together? I was with my first boyfriend for over a year and thought he was “the one”. I used to be crying alllll the time and felt like **** because of him...but I still loved him. Now I’m with someone who treats me well, and I no longer worry about being left.

Does he treat you well? Even if he does, does he make you upset without him knowing? Sometimes people just aren’t meant to be. I’m so sorry that this has happened...I had this exact situation happen with me in my first relationship that I mentioned.

When me and him broke up it felt like my world was gone, but I promise you that there is always someone who will suit you better.

Only you know if he’s worth your time. If he’s unsure, why should you give him the control to break up with you? How is it fair that you should sit and wait for his decision. I’m sorry but he should know if he loves you.

All the best... if you need more help please ask

We have been together a year and 7 months! Thank you!

Tbh, I was upset quite a lot, because I felt he didn't care and didn't love me and didn't want to be with me. But now I can't help regret feeling like this! I think those times I told him I didn't think he loved me or cared, is it possible I put into his head that he didn't? (I felt like this because he only wanted to see me around once a week, despite not being really busy and sometimes not being very effectionate)
Either this, or I knew how he felt before he opened up to me.

And despite this all, he doesn't treat me bad. I feel for him, I know this is hard for him, he told me he hates to think of me sat here waiting for a decision. But in my head I'm not, in my head it's over. I just didn't want to push him for an answer right away.

I just blame myself and think if I didn't moan so much maybe he would of been happy ☹️

Thanks again!! Xx

Reply 7

doodle_333

19

If he can't find a reason which you guys can improve then you might ahve to accept it's over... even if he won't accept it. It's normal to have rough patches in a long term relationship but you have to talk about it and both just make an effort to make the other feel loved/accepted/important/whatever else. But you've got to be willing to identify the problem, talk about how you feel and make an effort or it won't improve.

Boyfriend wants to break up?

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